dear_mun | On the D word. Also, Bacon.

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On the D word. Also, Bacon.

Good luck with that, but I won't be joining you unless they make diet bacon that tastes as good as the real thing. Don't even start talking to me about turkey bacon, I accidentally bought it in Paradise one time and thought I was eating a tire. Why does turkey bacon even exist? It doesn't get crispy right like the real bacon does.

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[strum]

♪ h, now this is different turf
Let me try the dialect - mrph mrph mrph mrph ♪

Oh, you're a musician?

[She laughs.]

Me too.

Because there are those that do not like pig? [Have a guy who likes to wear a gasmask.]

They are cute, but I suppose the cuteness adds to the deliciousness.

Only if you're not a vegitarian I guess.

I'm not.

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Do they even make diet bacon?

Yeah, the turkey kind is supposed to be diet... I think.

Right. I'll be sure not to get any of that, since you don't like it.

[Not that he will ever be the one doing the grocery shopping for RED base in Paradise.]

Wait, do you even go grocery shopping yourself for anything but decaf coffee?

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Turkey bacon ees an abomination.

[Hey, something they can agree on!]

You got that right.

[SPY AND PYRO AGREEING ON SOMETHING? WHAT IS THIS?]

[World implosion in 3... 2... 1.. ]

Eets not even bacon, just turkey pressed eento strips. I would actually zhink eets worse for you since eets made out of zhe leftovers of zhe turkey.

[Leftovers? What the?]

What do you mean leftover parts? What parts of a turkey would be leftover?

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I read somewhere that it's better for the heart; probably in some [finger quotes!] "medical journal" written by a "professional".

Feh. Can you believe it?

Sensei, I think they are lying in that professional stuff. Bacon is the best for you. It'll make you get big and strong just like me!

[Or maybe just big like her.]

As if I need to be any bigger and stronger. Heavy might get jealous and blame you for putting the idea in my head.

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Vell, perhaps you should occasionally eat zings ozzer zan bacon. You can't subsist on protein alone.

But proteins are so delicious!

You vill make yourself sick eating nozing but bacon. At ze very least, eat bacon viz somezing else.

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While I can't imagine bacon made from a bird tastin' the same as good old pork, I can't knock it until I've tried it at least once. Is it really that bad?

It's not good if it doesn't get crispy like the real thing. Birds should be left for meals like fried chicken.

Roast turkey ain't bad. Like for Thanksgiving?

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[Grumbles.] DIET and BACON are NOT words that go together.

I completely agree with you.

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