On the D word. Also, Bacon.

[notintehkitchen]

Good luck with that, but I won't be joining you unless they make diet bacon that tastes as good as the real thing. Don't even start talking to me about turkey bacon, I accidentally bought it in Paradise one time and thought I was eating a tire. Why does turkey bacon even exist? It doesn't get crispy right like the real bacon does.

Comments

[sentryslinger]

While I can't imagine bacon made from a bird tastin' the same as good old pork, I can't knock it until I've tried it at least once. Is it really that bad?

[notintehkitchen]

It's not good if it doesn't get crispy like the real thing. Birds should be left for meals like fried chicken.

[sentryslinger]

Roast turkey ain't bad. Like for Thanksgiving?

[notintehkitchen]

I did end up making Thanksgiving food like turkey without burning down the whole entire base. I think it turned out alright.

[sentryslinger]

I'll bet it was a mighty fine meal, Pyro. I'll have to try your cookin' one of these days.

[notintehkitchen]

Oh, um. Yes! Please do, I would like that a lot.

[sentryslinger]

I will, then.

How are things for you at that city of yours, Py? You takin' care of things there?

[notintehkitchen]

Yes, I'm making sure Mr. Hawk gets plenty to eat and watching after all the little cute ones. Speaking of which, there have been tons of new children entering Paradise as of late! I guess that means I'll have more people to play with at the toy store!

[sentryslinger]

Someone's gotta take care of the children. It's a wonder why mundanes put them through these games sometimes.

[notintehkitchen]

Don't worry! I'll protect them and adopt them all!

[Pyro is a very motherly woman.]

[sentryslinger]

[He can tell.]

And the rest of the REDs are going to help you with that?

[notintehkitchen]

I don't know if the rest of them like children.

[sentryslinger]

Have you asked them?

[notintehkitchen]

No, I'm afraid what their answer would be.

[sentryslinger]

Why's that?

[notintehkitchen]

It's Sniper and Scout. I doubt either of them wants to be associated with children. Mr. Hawk will probably just grumble at me if I brought the topic up and Scout would be offended because he's a child too.

[sentryslinger]

I guess that does put you in a tight spot, doesn't it? Still, if you really like children, you oughtta look after 'em. Someone needs to.

As for Sniper and Scout, it's not like they can avoid kids forever. I reckon they're going to have to learn to handle them sometime.

[notintehkitchen]

[She nods her head.]

Yes, there is this one girl I'm particularly worried about. She thinks she's about five-hundred years old but looks more like five.

[sentryslinger]

I don't suppose I'll ask how she got that way, though if she's survived five-hundred years, she'll probably be just fine with anything one of these games can throw at her.

Now that I think about it, maybe it's your teammates you need to be keeping a close eye on. Scout can be a lot to handle, and Sniper may get along just fine by himself, but I get the feeling city life ain't for him.

[notintehkitchen]

I figured that out when I realized he didn't know how to cook anything that wasn't some dead critter he sniped at. As a bushman his hygiene is also...lacking.

[sentryslinger]

I'm guessin' he's used to bein' on his own out in the woods somewhere. Probably don't see a lot of showers out there. It takes a while to break old habits, but I'll bet he'd change if he had the right motivation.

[Grin.]

[notintehkitchen]

[Noooo, don't grin at her like that Engie. It's a weakness!]

I've given him hints but he's a stubborn one.

[sentryslinger]

Have you tried just telling him? Some men got thicker skulls than others.

[notintehkitchen]

I might hurt his feelings if I do it that way.

[sentryslinger]

[Laughing.]

He's a big boy, Pyro. I'm sure he can take it.