dear_mun | Karkat made a new friend

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canon: ms paint adventures

Karkat made a new friend

OH MY GOD!
I SWEAR EACH SUCCESSIVE MUSE THAT ENTERS YOUR HEAD IS A BIGGER ASSHOLE THAN THE LAST.
I DIDN'T THINK IT WAS POSSIBLE FOR ANYONE TO BE MORE OF A DOUCHEBAG THAN DAVE
BUT SOMEHOW STRIDER NUMBER TWO PULLS IT OFF.
DIRK ACTS LIKE HE'S THE HOTTEST SHIT EVEN THOUGH HE LITERALLY BLOWS CHUNKS ALL THE WAY OUT THE PROTEIN CHUTE.
WHO DOES HE THINK HE IS TO TELL ME WHO I CAN AND CAN'T HAVE A CRUSH ON?
I AM THE EXPERT ON ROMANCE.
ME, NOT HIM.
AND THE LAST THING I NEED IS SOME INSUFFERABLE PRICK TELLING ME WHO I CAN'T DATE.
SERIOUSLY, GET THIS SMUG, NOOK SNIFFING BASTARD OUT OF HERE.
DIRK IS SUCH A DICK.
HE IS SUCH A DICK THAT DICK IS GOING TO BE HIS NAME FROM NOW ON.
WHENEVER I SAY THE WORD DICK IN THE FUTURE PLEASE ASSUME I'M TALKING ABOUT DIRK.
ALSO, DICK IS COMPLETELY DISRESPECTFUL OF MY PERSONAL SPACE.
I GUESS IT RUNS IN THE STRIDER FAMILY.
IF HE FLICKS MY HORNS WITH HIS FINGERS ONE MORE TIME I AM GOING TO SHIT SO MUCH RAGE SNAKE THAT THIS ENTIRE THINK PAN WILL BE FULL OF IT.
NOT THAT IT ALREADY ISN'T, BECAUSE WE BOTH KNOW YOU'RE FULL OF SHIT.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

ur pretty shy huh
cute

half joking
some data charts can be hella interesting
grass data charts
probably not so much
but like i said
i could get really fucking bored

awwww almost got my hopes up there a min
id <3 to watch romcoms with u
and to get to know you

I'M NOT SHY.
I JUST HAVE A LITTLE SOMETHING CALLED A FUCKING SENSE OF DECENCY.
WHICH *APPARENTLY* IS MORE THAN MOST PEOPLE HAVE.

I DON'T SEE HOW A DATA CHART COULD BE INTERESTING
BUT THEN I'M NOT INTO ALL THAT SCIENCEY STUFF.
IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE TO ME.
I DON'T HAVE THE PATIENCE FOR IT.
BUT I KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE BORED
AND IT SUCKS.

WELL, I GUESS I'M NOT RULING IT OUT.
THE DATE THING, I MEAN.
BUT IT SEEMED LIKE AN AWKWARD THING TO ASK SOMEONE YOU JUST MET.
SO MAYBE WE CAN START AS FRIENDS FIRST
IF THAT'S ALL RIGHT WITH YOU?

guess so!
hell if i know how many people have decency
only know teenagers myself

yeah its p much an interest in science thing
not really sure how to explain it
just
kind of cool to see how stuff changes and relates and what is all means
learning about what makes up the world

lol
yea thats legit
good to know its not off the table tho~ *wonk*
not that i would have minded if u did
friends is good tho
i will never say no to a new friend
so long as theyre not some psycho
we can be friends and watch all the romcoms

YOU CAN BE A TEENAGER AND STILL HAVE DECENCY.
I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD IT IS A THING THAT CAN HAPPEN
EVEN THOUGH THERE ARE APPARENTLY VERY FEW PEOPLE WHO CAN PULL IT OFF.

I GUESS I CAN UNDERSTAND THAT
BUT I DON'T HAVE MUCH EXPERIENCE WITH SCIENCE
BESIDES THE FROG BREEDING, WHICH WAS BORING AS HELL.
I DON'T CARE ABOUT ALL THAT ECTOBIOLOGICAL BULLSHIT.
ON THE OTHER HAND, I PROBABLY SHOULD HAVE PAID MORE ATTENTION
BECAUSE I KIND OF FUCKED UP THE FROG.

NO ONE IS OFF THE TABLE.
ALL OF THE PEOPLE ARE ON THE TABLE.
IT'S SORT OF CONFUSING ACTUALLY.
WHAT ARE THEY ALL DOING THERE IN THE FIRST PLACE AND WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH THEM?
I DON'T KNOW.
I'M NOT EVEN SURE WHAT WE'RE TALKING ABOUT ANYMORE.

i would not kno
all i know are dorks
and im probably indecent enough to make up for any decency they do have if a convo goes that way
yeah jane is probs all right with decency
hard to tell with jake for all i know some of the stuff he says could be racy as fuck in his head

ectobiology is haaaaard
only just got the time paradox idea as soon as i realized i might be my own mom
i was better with the mutation and breeding part myself
the legit clones was already beyond me and that was probably why
wasn't thinking that way
...
wait
what frog
why do frogs keep coming up
why are frogs a thing in relation to this game

ooooo rly now
i think u just said youd be willing to date everyone
give em a shot at least

YOU DON'T SEEM INDECENT.
I'VE BEEN TALKING TO YOU FOR AWHILE NOW AND YOU HAVEN'T SAID ANYTHING EVEN REMOTELY OFFENSIVE.
AS OPPOSED TO DIRK, WHO SAYS OFFENSIVE THINGS ALL THE TIME.
I DON'T THINK HE CAN HOLD A CONVERSATION WITHOUT MAKING VAGUELY SUGGESTIVE COMMENTS
OR IN SOME CASES OBVIOUS SEXUAL REFERENCES.
FOR THAT MATTER HE HAS THE INFURIATING ABILITY TO MAKE EVEN THE SIMPLEST THINGS SOUND OBSCENE.

AND YES, FROGS ARE A THING IN RELATION TO THE GAME
OR AT LEAST THEY'RE SUPPOSED TO BE.
I'M NOT SURE HOW YOUR SESSION WORKS
SO I CAN'T SAY.

NO, NOT EVERYONE.
WELL, OKAY.
I'D PROBABLY GIVE MOST PEOPLE A CHANCE AS LONG AS THEY AREN'T AWFUL.
IT'S JUST THAT SEEING MULTIPLE VERSIONS OF YOURSELF IN RELATIONSHIPS WITH ALL KINDS OF PEOPLE, SOME OF WHOM YOU'D NEVER EVEN CONSIDER, IS KIND OF CONFUSING.
I'M PRETTY SURE ALL OF THE MULTIVERSE IS CONFUSING THOUGH.

maybe i will next time ;)
but nah its like
at least have a few conversations before you make it obvious youre a huge pervert
or something
like thats manners and being polite
sort of thing
at least i assume people arent usually massive perverts the first meeting
thats a thing right
and yeah he does that
he likes to rile ppl a bit
or hes hitting on you

all i know if calliope said our universe was being torn apart by the red miles
because some asshole was attacking our universe frog
we dont got any ectobiology going on in our session tho
i have no seen a link of an ectobio lab
didnt even come with my house

yeah it pretty much is
like i have been in all these memes
and i have now dated like
equius nepeta rose human!vriska and a guy named hnaef from another universe
then the one night stand dealies which is a whole bunch more
so its just
kind of
welp
i guess these are pairings that are happening
not that i mind really
they were nice

YEAH, I GET IT.
YOU DON'T WANT TO IMMEDIATELY CLUE EVERYONE IN ON YOUR CRAZY.
I COULD TAKE POINTERS ON THAT.
SOME PEOPLE HAVE NO RESTRAINT THOUGH
OR MAYBE THEY JUST CAN'T BE ASSED TO USE WHAT RESTRAINT THEY HAVE.
LIKE DIRK FOR INSTANCE.
I DON'T KNOW IF HE CAN'T CONTROL HIMSELF OR IF HE JUST LIKES FUCKING WITH PEOPLE
BUT I SUSPECT THE LATTER.
I REALLY DON'T THINK HE'S HITTING ON ME THOUGH.
IF HE WERE HE PROBABLY WOULD HAVE MADE HIS MOVE ALREADY.
I'VE SEEN HOW HE IS WITH ENGLISH.

YEAH, THE RED MILES ARE A THING.
A THING YOU APPARENTLY CAN'T ESCAPE.
AND I WAS THE FIRST ONE WHO USED ECTOBIOLOGICAL LAB IN MY SESSION.
I'M NOT SURE HOW I MADE IT WORK, BUT I DID.
YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MANY WIGGLERS I MADE.
I WAS BURIED UP TO MY HORNS IN THEM.
IT WAS INSANE.

THAT SOUNDS LIKE A LOT.
I HAVEN'T DATED EVEN HALF THAT MANY AND I'M NOT SURE I'D WANT TO.
I GUESS I JUST WANT SOMETHING A LITTLE MORE MEANINGFUL THAN A BUNCH OF RANDOM ENCOUNTERS.
I WANT TO SPEND TIME WITH SOMEONE AND GET TO KNOW THEM.
WHAT'S THE FUN IN DATING IF NO ONE EVER STICKS AROUND?

precisely!
gotta get them in too deep to pull out
already in roxy lalondes web of friendship
too late to turn back just cuz shes got a gutterbrain
dirk likes fucking with ppl
if anything hes got too MUCH control of himself
hes gotta plan all his shit out
test the waters
run all the scenarios virtually
compare and contrast all the results
and then hell make a move
took forever before he made a real overt move on jake
see he just got exposed to u
itll probs be at least six months before u can say for sure if hes hitting on u or not
with intentions to actually go somewhere with it
hes all obtuse like that
but he might just hit on u cuz you have amusing reactions

apparently not
fucking thing came out of nowhere and shanked me in the gut
not fun
i can imagine
sometimes u make one thing and ohshit theres suddenly things all over
wigglers
mutant cats
its real hard to lose control when you get going
it is a fine art tho
even i only got mutations and breeding
never been able to make a legit clone
i think im missing some of the theory
whatever makes it make sense im my own mom
genetically speaking

well some does continue
like equius happened over the period of several threads because we kept ending up on the same meme
it was cute
the other stuff we kind of make up a backstory on the fly
which is kind of a trip
oh hello history suddenly existing
tho that usually happens for anytime i talk to a troll if it doesnt make sense to be a first meeting
but hey if i thread with those people again
then it might be 'sticking around'
and thats pretty fun
a story that somehow exists across the metaverse
almost romantic that way

GREAT, THAT'S JUST WHAT I NEED
A FULL SIX MONTHS OF WONDERING WHAT THE FUCK DIRK WANTS FROM ME.
ARE ALL STRIDERS LIKE THIS?
OH WAIT, OF COURSE THEY ARE.
I NEVER COULD TELL IF DAVE WAS SERIOUS ABOUT TEREZI EITHER.
HE WAS SUCH AN ALOOF ASSHOLE THE ENTIRE TIME
IT MUST BE A STRIDER THING.
YOU CAN'T EVER TELL WHAT THEY'RE UP TO
SO DON'T EVEN BOTHER TRYING.
IT'LL ONLY END IN MISERY AND FRUSTRATION.
AND OCCASIONALLY A SUPLEX OR TWO.
WELL DIRK CAN DO WHATEVER HE WANTS
IT WON'T CHANGE MY MIND.
I DON'T LIKE HIM LIKE THAT.

WHEN I GOT TO THE LAB IT WAS ALREADY SET UP.
ALL I HAD TO DO WAS PUSH BUTTONS.
IT WAS SO EASY EVEN A WIGGLER COULD DO IT.
SO I DON'T KNOW THAT IT SAYS MUCH FOR MY "PROWESS" IN ECTOBIOLOGY THAT I WAS ABLE TO MAKE IT WORK.
I NEVER EVEN UNDERSTOOD AT THE TIME THAT SOME OF THE GRUBS I MADE WERE MY OWN ANCESTORS.
IT WAS JUST A THING THAT HAPPENED
AND AFTERWARD I WAS LIKE, WHAT THE BULGE MUNCHING FUCK WAS THAT?

YES, SOME THINGS CONTINUE
BUT SOME DON'T
EVEN THE ONES THAT DO AREN'T ENOUGH FOR ME.
I WANT A HOME
BUT I DON'T WANT TO GO TO THE SAME AWFUL PLACE THE MUN IS SENDING KANKRI TO
OR ANYWHERE ELSE LIKE IT FOR THAT MATTER.
I JUST HAVE TO KEEP LOOKING I GUESS.
MAYBE I'LL FIND SOMETHING EVENTUALLY.

well on the bright side
if you WERE interested and straight up asked dirk about it
hed probs give u a straight answer
if youre all in limbo he can plan all he wants
but hes not really dickish enough to lead you on
course youd have to be interested its that whole not wanting to cause inner torment
beyond the usual just fucking with you
which is more annoying then self esteem shattering
never seen dave with terezi so i couldnt tell you
but he probably wouldnt do the lead on thing either
hes got a gooey center of sweetness
actually that is pretty much a strider thing
i like you a whole lot
i would do anything to protect you even the most crazy fucked up things
shank a bitch
and take a bullet
but nah im just gonna be over here and be 'sup'
do not give a shit even tho i give all the shits
dirk dave davesprite
all been like that

my lab was like that too
but then i got curious and found stuff
lots of digging in networks and what the carapacians knew
and then i made cats that werent dead
so i guess your prowess was better than mind because at least they were living wigglers
which is probably a good thing
the alternative seems nightmare inducing

id like that too
just waiting on chance to tag them or be tagged back
the mun is hopeful ill be accepted to the amnesia fairy tale land this week
then its just waiting for a spot to open
(the mun would try to enable except other you was there and is player locked because amnesia memory regain makes for complications in replacement player apps)
but im sure youll find something
whats so bad about the place kankri is going to

THAT DOESN'T HELP BECAUSE I'M NOT INTERESTED.
IF I'M NOT INTERESTED AND HE IS THEN I DON'T THINK HE'LL GIVE ME A STRAIGHT ANSWER.
EITHER WAY HE SWEARS HE ISN'T
AND I WOULD BELIEVE HIM IF IT WEREN'T FOR OTHER PEOPLE WHO KEEP SAYING HE IS.
SO I DON'T KNOW.
MAYBE IT'S TRUE, BUT HE'S STILL REALLY ANTAGONIZING.
YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW NERVE-WRACKING HIS BEHAVIOR CAN BE.
AND I'M SURE HE'S DOING IT ON PURPOSE
JUST TO PISS ME OFF.
OKAY, MAYBE HE ISN'T A BAD PERSON.
I KNOW HE CARES ABOUT HIS FRIENDS.
AND MAYBE UNDERNEATH ALL THE NAGGING AND TEASING HE'S ACTUALLY TRYING TO HELP.
BUT SOMETIMES EVERY LITTLE THING HE DOES IS AGGRAVATING.
IF HE COULD JUST TONE IT DOWN A BIT I WOULD REALLY APPRECIATE THAT.

I NEVER DID ANY DIGGING.
NEVER LEARNED ANYTHING ABOUT NETWORKS.
JUST PUSHED SOME BUTTONS.
ANYONE COULD HAVE DONE IT.
I NEVER MADE ANY CATS EITHER.
WHY CATS?

GOOD LUCK GETTING INTO THAT GAME.
IT SOUNDS LIKE FUN.
KANKRI IS GOING INTO A SEX GAME.
I DON'T KNOW IF YOU KNOW HIM OR ANYTHING ABOUT HIM
BUT THAT'S THE WORST PLACE YOU COULD PUT A GUY LIKE HIM.
HE MADE A VOW OF CHASTITY AND THE MUN IS GOING TO FORCE HIM TO BREAK IT.
HE IS THE WORST MUN.

sounds like he already gave you a straight answer
it was a straight answer swear right
not obtuse or vague?
because if it was straight up then yeah
being legit
obtuse means he could be interested or just trying to rile you by being obtuse
its always a hard call second hand
yeah hes got some tone problems
have you told him that
srsly tell him that
pull back mr strider
if you want to help thats cool
but dont over do it
dirk really does want to help ppl but extents are a tricky business
when it too much and such
kind of got an idea of how nerve wracking
seen him go too far before
...
huh hes actually only really avoided going too far with me
that probably says something
not sure what

because cats are fucking awesome and because i may have stolen my moms cat
and thought why the hell not
all i had was carapacians fish and the occasional bird
cats were novel
like the tree

ooooo yeah sex games
always a bundle of fridge horror
poor kankri
hopefully you avoid that

I GUESS SO.
HE WASN'T OBTUSE ABOUT IT.
BUT THEN THIS OTHER DIRK CAME ALONG AND SAID HE WAS DEFINTELY HITTING ON ME.
AND YOU SAID HE MIGHT BE AS WELL.
SO I'M JUST A LITTLE CONFUSED HERE.
I DON'T KNOW DIRK WELL ENOUGH TO KNOW IF HE'S TELLING THE TRUTH
OR IF HE'D LIE ABOUT THIS SORT OF THING.
YOU KNOW HIM BETTER THAN ME
SO IF YOU THINK HE'S BEING HONEST I'LL TAKE YOUR WORD FOR IT.
IT'S NOT LIKE I'M OUT TO GET HIM.
I DON'T HATE HIM OR ANYTHING
AND I GUESS HE'S KIND OF ATTRACTIVE IN HIS OWN DOUCHEY WAY.
BUT I DON'T HAVE ANY ROMANTIC FEELINGS FOR HIM.
I DON'T THINK HE DOES FOR ME EITHER.
I MEAN, IT WOULDN'T SURPRISE ME IF HE WANTED TO GET INTO MY PANTS
BECAUSE HE SEEMS LIKE THE KIND OF GUY WHO'D DO THAT WITH PRETTY MUCH ANYONE
OR AT LEAST ANYONE WHO ISN'T A GIRL.
BUT IT ISN'T AN EMOTIONAL THING.

I'LL BE FINE.
THE MUN DOESN'T HAVE ANY PLANS FOR ME
BESIDES SOME WEIRD FOURTH WALL THING.
I THINK I CAN HANDLE THAT.

my bet is on other dirk was trying to mess with u
when it comes to romance if dirk is being straight up
its legit
but dirk splinters will troll main dirk so i would not be surprised if other dirks were trying to troll him
dirk has zero interest in the female persuasion
at least on a physical lvl
soft curves dont do jack for him
i cant say his thoughts on casual tho
we literally knew two other boys
and callies bro is a major douche
and apparently his species turns into giant snakes when they have sex and dont do red feelings
so that wouldnt work
all i got for dirk and relationships for sure is jake
hes certainly casual enough TALKING about it though
its like this question of
okay
can dirk be casual for the sake of being able to actually explore his sexuality
and being a teenager
or will his nature of being the most protective mother fucker
and getting super attached
make it so he cant do casual
ergo
i have no idea if he wants in ur pants casual like
or if hes inclined to act on it if he is

fourth walls are super awesome
a lot of fun
get to see people
and meet others
learn all about these crazy games
been in a few myself

HE WASN'T A SPLINTER THOUGH
OR AT LEAST I DON'T THINK HE WAS.
HE WAS ANOTHER DIRK IN THE SAME WAY THERE ARE OTHER KARKATS THAT ARE JUST LIKE ME.
IT WASN'T THE AR, OR A BRAIN GHOST DIRK AS FAR AS I KNOW.
AND I'VE NOTICED THAT HE HASN'T SHOWN ANY INTEREST IN GIRLS.
HE ONLY TALKS ABOUT GUYS
ALL THE TIME.
I THINK IT'S WEIRD, BUT WHAT DO I KNOW ABOUT HUMANS AND YOUR STRANGE MATING RITUALS?
NOT THAT MUCH, OBVIOUSLY.
ALL I KNOW IS THAT RIGHT NOW HE'S MAKING OUT WITH JAKE
AND HOOKING UP WITH SOME RANDOM DUDE WHO HE'S APPARENTLY GOING TO PAIL WITH IN EXCHANGE FOR HUMAN MONEY.
I DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW THAT WORKS AND I DON'T WANT TO.

I'VE NEVER BEEN IN A FOURTH WALL EVENT BEFORE
BUT IT SOUNDS LIKE FUN.
ANYTHING HAS TO BE BETTER THAN SITTING AROUND IN THIS HEADSPACE.
MAYBE IF I LIKE IT WELL ENOUGH I'LL ASK MY MUN TO LET ME STAY IN THE GAME.
I HEAR THAT'S A THING YOU CAN DO.

yeah it was probs another dirk
they pop up
just sayin dirk would totes troll himself
splinter or not
the thing is you got human teenager
like the teens years is ultra high lvls of perversion
its the hormones man
they just wreck our thinkpans
and human sexuality is a whole mess
could go on forever about all the nuances of it
at least what was nuances
we learned troll standards before human standards so its a bit weird
but biology will not be denied and gotta accept the orientation human system is a thing
even if dirk hates the labels
unless trolls can be gay and its just not obvious for whatever reason
or its like a kink or something
short story is dirk only wants dicks cuz biology
so trolls never had prostitution huh
or do you mean the crazy metaspace timelines

fourth walls are the BEST for enabling
get cr that will come
and see if you can work with the setting
all sorts of fun stuff you can figure out without having to go through the whole app process

WHY WOULD HE TROLL HIMSELF?
THAT SOUNDS SO STUPID.
SURE, IF IT WERE ME, THEN I WOULD PROBABLY DO MY BEST TO MAKE MY OTHER SELF'S LIFE A LIVING HELL.
BUT IT'S PRETTY OBVIOUS THAT I HATE MY PAST AND FUTURE SELVES.
ON THE OTHER HAND, DIRK SEEMS TO LIKE HIMSELF.
HE'S PRETTY FULL OF HIMSELF IN FACT.
ALL INSUFFERABLE PRICKS ARE.
EVEN IF THERE WERE TWO OF HIM HE'D PROBABLY JUST STAND AROUND AND TALK ABOUT HOW AWESOME HE IS
THAT'S ALL HE EVER DOES.
ARE YOU SERIOUSLY TELLING ME THAT ANOTHER HIM WOULD TRY TO MESS THINGS UP FOR HIM?

I DON'T KNOW IF SEXUALITY IS A THING FOR TROLLS.
WE OBVIOUSLY DON'T HAVE A WORD FOR IT, BUT LATELY I'VE BEEN WONDERING IF SOME TROLLS HAVE PREFERENCES.
VRISKA FOR INSTANCE, I'VE NEVER SEEN HER WITH A GIRL.
BUT THAT COULD BE BECAUSE NONE OF THE GIRLS WE KNOW ARE HER TYPE.
SHE'S INTO PEOPLE SHE CAN EASILY MANIPULATE
AND THAT RULES OUT ALL THE GIRLS I KNOW.
ONLY THE GUYS ARE THAT PATHETIC.
SO I DON'T KNOW IF IT'S AN ORIENTATION SO MUCH AS THE FACT THAT SHE PERFERS A CERTAIN TYPE OF PERSON, AND IT JUST HAPPENS THAT THERE AREN'T ANY GIRLS NEARBY WHO ARE HER TYPE.
LIKE, MAYBE IF WE KNEW SOME TROLL GIRLS WHO COULD BE MANIPULATED EASILY SHE'D GO FOR THEM?
I DON'T KNOW.

NO, I MEANT THE PAYING FOR SEX THING.
IS THAT WHAT PROSTITUTION IS?
I'VE NEVER HEARD OF IT BEFORE.

I MEANT TO GO IN AS SOON AS IT STARTED, BUT THEN THINGS HAPPENED.
THE MUN IS USUALLY BUSY ON WEEKENDS SO HE SHOULD HAVE REALIZED IT WOULD BE A PROBLEM.
I'M GOING IN NOW THOUGH.

haha
yeah
he certainly gives off that kind of air
trust me
chances are high hed mess with himself
i mean he might not go for living hell
but some trolling
defs

shed be pretty hard pressed to find a girl like that
at least none of the girls i met seem easy to manipulate
closest would be me
and tahts less manipulating
and more me not giving a shit most of the time
like i need a reason not to do a thing sometimes
if the thing sounds like it might be fun then why the hell not
kanaya seems to have a preference tho
i mean
never seen her admire a guy
but shell admire girls
not just rose we talked about babe standards for a while

yeah thats what prostitution is
called the worlds oldest profession on earth
ppl always willing to pay for sex
easier than seducing someone i guess

cursed schedules really do cut into the play time
and kind of leads to horrible meta space thought processes
have fun~

OKAY, IF YOU SAY SO.

YOU MAY HAVE A POINT ABOUT THAT.
I NEVER HEARD HER ADMIRE ANY GUYS EITHER.
THEN AGAIN, SHE WAS NEVER VERY VOCAL ABOUT ANY OF HER CRUSHES.
I DON'T THINK MOST OF OUR FRIENDS EVER KNEW SHE HAD A THING FOR VRISKA
AND IF WE HADN'T MET ROSE THEY MIGHT NOT HAVE NOTICED THAT EITHER.
IT'S HARD TO TELL WITH HER.

SPEAKING OF VRISKA, I'VE BEEN TALKING TO HER A LOT LATELY.
SHE WAS THE ONE WHO TOLD ME ABOUT THE EVENT, AND NOW THAT I'M THERE WE HAVE A FEW THREADS TOGETHER.
APPARENTLY THERE AREN'T A LOT OF PEOPLE FROM HOME THERE
JUST HER, KANAYA, ROSE, AND JOHN.
SO I'M HANGING OUT WITH VRISKA AND JOHN RIGHT NOW.
I HAVEN'T SEEN KANAYA OR ROSE YET.

DIRK SAID YOU DON'T PAY THEM FOR THE SEX
YOU PAY THEM SO YOU CAN LEAVE AFTERWARD.
I DON'T THINK IT MAKES ANY SENSE THOUGH.
THAT GUY WOULDN'T PAIL WITH HIM IF DIRK WEREN'T PAYING HIM.
AND THEN DIRK SAID SOMETHING ABOUT HOW CRUEL IT WOULD BE TO HAVE A ONE NIGHT STAND WITH SOMEONE
BECAUSE THEY'D ONLY GET TO HAVE the Strider experience ONCE, AND THEN NEVER AGAIN.
THAT IS SUCH A COLOSSAL LOAD OF SHIT, AND I TOLD HIM SO.
BUT AS FAR AS I CAN TELL WHAT IT BOILS DOWN TO IS THAT HE'S PAYING SOMEONE SPECIFICALLY BECAUSE HE DOESN'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP.
BUT I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY YOU WOULD WANT TO PAIL WITH SOMEONE YOU DON'T HAVE FEELINGS FOR IN THE FIRST PLACE.

trust me
at this point in time dirk isnt interested in anything serious
with the prostitution he might be in for the casual
seems like he can do that!

she is a very composed lady
at least until you get her gushing a bit
shes absolutely adorbs then
told her all about human weddings and it was just so cute
i swear im gonna make that girl part of the lalonde family
i want to see her and rosie being classy ladies in wedding dresses
but yeah i kind of had to prompt it

oooo yeah!
the mun wanted to throw me into that too
nothing like hanging with peeps
gonna get her to go check it out now

thats one way to look at it
and yeah hes kind of bsing there
hormones are kind of a bitch
esp when u grew up in the future without any options
all outlets r literally u
and no one else
for anything physical
i guess it may just be a human thing
some humans would only do that sort of thing with someone theyre in a relationship with
but if the movies are to be believed
and jane says they are
there are people who want to get off
so its not just like dirk and i want to compensate for all the years of nothing
just a human thing
i mean it feels really nice
its enjoyable
and it can be pretty safe as long as ppl arent dumbasses

I KNOW HE ISN'T INTERESTED IN ANYTHING SERIOUS.
THAT MUCH IS OBVIOUS.
I'M PRETTY SURE HE'S STILL TRYING TO WORK THINGS OUT WITH JAKE.
HE NEVER SAYS ANYTHING ABOUT IT
BUT YOU CAN TELL BECAUSE OF THE WAY HE ACTS.
SO I GET THAT HE DOESN'T WANT TO GET ROMANTICALLY INVOLVED WITH ANYONE ELSE
BUT THEN WHY GET INVOLVED WITH THEM PHYSICALLY?
IT SEEMS COUNTER-PRODUCTIVE TO ME.
OR AT THE VERY LEAST, MEANINGLESS.
OKAY, I CAN'T SAY THAT IT WOULD INTERFERE WITH HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH JAKE
BUT WHAT PURPOSE WOULD IT SERVE?

MAYBE I JUST DON'T GET IT BECAUSE IT'S SOMETHING I WOULD NEVER DO.
THE VERY IDEA OF PAILING WITH A STRANGER MAKES ME UNCOMFORTABLE.
I'D NEED TO HAVE FEELINGS FOR SOMEONE BEFORE I'D EVEN CONSIDER THAT.
I GUESS, BECAUSE OF MY BLOOD, I'VE ALWAYS BEEN CAUTIOUS ABOUT WHO I GET CLOSE TO.
IT DOESN'T REALLY MATTER THAT I'M A MUTANT HERE
BUT I'D STILL FEEL BETTER KNOWING I WAS WITH SOMEONE THAT I CARED FOR AND KNEW I COULD TRUST.
SO I'LL PROBABLY NEVER DO THE PAILING WITH STRANGERS THING.

AND I'M NOT TRYING TO BE JUDGEMENTAL
OR TO TELL HIM WHAT TO DO WITH HIS LIFE.
I JUST DON'T GET IT.
THAT SORT OF CONCUPISCENT ACTIVITY ISN'T AT ALL APPEALING TO ME.

AND I GUESS I'LL SEE YOU AT THE FOURTH WALL THING?
SORRY IT TOOK ME AWHILE TO GET BACK TO YOU.
THE MUN HAS A LOT ON HIS HANDS AT THE MOMENT.

ur getting good at readin dirk
congrats!
hes got a lot always goin in his head
i dont think he could talk about it all even if he was inclined to
very careful and stoick sort
as for why dirk would do it personally
instead of just being a human thing
couldnt say for sure but i can make a guess
dirk didnt get contact until he was in the game
at least i had carapacians
who for all their alienness
are still sentient beings
dirk had a super tiny horse, seagulls, and fish if he was gonna touch anything living
there doesnt need to be a purpose to want human touch
to feel warmth and life and proof ur not alone
and hell for all the kinds of human touches there are
sex would get a lot of touch but not making it obvious thats what someone wants
cuddling touching hugging
a lot of that is 'please let me have this warmth'
but sex you can get it and funny enough you dont have to be as vulnerable

nothing wrong with having that preference
lots of humans arent all for jumping on the sex train either
its a personal choice
ur body
ur decisions
even if the mutant thing is a sad reason ):
still wanting the trust and care is pretty legit tho
very sweet and romantic

thats also legit
understanding why people are certain ways can be hard anyway

its cool!
we can hang out in backtag land
not like our muns havent proven they can backtag into infinity
man ive been talking to dirk for like a month and a half
its great

I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THAT.
I USUALLY CAN'T TELL WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON WITH HIM.
I AM AN EXPERT AT ROMANCE THOUGH
AND HE'S BEEN PRETTY OBVIOUS ABOUT IT.
MAYBE IF HE HADN'T TRIED TO TELL ME NOT TO DATE JOHN I WOULDN'T HAVE FIGURED IT OUT
BUT HE PRETTY MUCH OUTED HIMSELF BY COMPARING JOHN TO JAKE.
SURE, THEY'RE BOTH A COUPLE OF FLAKES, BUT THEY'RE TWO DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
JUST BECAUSE HE HAD SOME RELATIONSHIP PROBLEMS WITH JAKE DOESN'T MEAN JOHN IS GOING TO DUMP ME.
I MEAN, I GET WHY HE WOULD THINK THAT, BECAUSE I TOLD HIM THAT JOHN SAID HE WASN'T A HOMOSEXUAL
AND I KNOW THAT'S A BIG HANGUP FOR DIRK
THE HOMOSEXUAL THING.
BUT JOHN SAID THAT YEARS AGO
HE BARELY EVEN KNEW ME AT THE TIME AND HE DIDN'T UNDERSTAND MY CULTURE.
I'M NOT TRYING TO SAY THAT ALL PEOPLE CAN CHANGE THEIR MINDS ABOUT IT
BUT MAYBE SOME CAN?

AND I GUESS IT'S PRETTY SAD THAT HE DIDN'T HAVE ANYONE AROUND.
I NEVER HAD A WHOLE LOT OF FRIENDS EITHER
NOT IN PERSON ANYWAY, NOT UNTIL WE ENTERED THE GAME.
BEFORE THAT I JUST MESSAGED THEM THROUGH TROLLIAN.
BUT THERE WAS ALWAYS MY LUSUS.
SO I WAS NEVER REALLY ALONE.
YOU KEEP SAYING human touch, BUT I'M PRETTY SURE THAT'S A THING FOR TROLLS TOO.
WE'RE NOT THE MOST FRIENDLY RACE, BUT WE STILL NEED TO TOUCH PEOPLE.
AND THERE ARE SOME TROLLS WHO ARE PROMISCUOUS TOO
SO I DON'T THINK IT'S JUST A HUMAN THING.
I PROBABLY NEED IT AS BADLY AS HE DOES
I JUST HAVE DIFFERENT STANDARDS.

I KNOW.
IT'S WEIRD, BUT DIRK SEEMS A LOT CALMER AFTER HE'S BEEN TALKING TO YOU.
SO GOOD JOB.
YOU'RE ALREADY SHAPING UP TO BE A PRETTY DECENT MOIRAIL.

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