theslut: (what.)
ivan | oglaf ([personal profile] theslut) wrote in [community profile] dear_mun2012-01-25 11:04 pm
Entry tags:

canon is oglaf. it's not safe for work.

Magical coma is pretty much the same thing as dead, and you should leave the dead alone.
themistress: (what.)

AJSLAKSJAJS I HAVE BEEN SEARCHING FOR YOU, APPRENTICE :D

[personal profile] themistress 2012-01-26 07:34 am (UTC)(link)
Oh no, do wake up. No job should be left unfinished.
themistress: (ivan's about to die.)

/NEVER LETS YOU GO

[personal profile] themistress 2012-01-26 06:40 pm (UTC)(link)
Whether we replaced you isn't the point. You were supposed to die, and you somehow managed to weasel your way out of it. I'm sure you know my feelings regarding your failure to complete tasks.
themistress: (bad falcon! lazy!)

/EAGERLY AWAITS YOUR RETURN

[personal profile] themistress 2012-01-26 06:50 pm (UTC)(link)
Of course I don't expect you to do all of the work in your murder, Ivan. I simply expected you to do the dying part. "Falling into a magical sleep" isn't the same thing at all, and I don't find it acceptable.
themistress: (thinking.)

/handcuffs you to the radiator

[personal profile] themistress 2012-01-27 06:05 am (UTC)(link)
I haven't quite decided yet, honestly. There'd be something satisfying in killing you, I admit. Then again, I might just have you dissected -- alive -- to see how you managed to stay alive at all.
themistress: (crown.)

[personal profile] themistress 2012-01-27 06:12 am (UTC)(link)
Mmn, but you've taken so little away from my lessons.
themistress: (well?)

[personal profile] themistress 2012-01-27 06:17 am (UTC)(link)
How can I teach you magic when you don't even know better than not to kill people with magic arrows?
themistress: (boring.)

[personal profile] themistress 2012-01-27 06:22 am (UTC)(link)
So you want the construction team to make special cases for rubbish tributes, rather than you just learning to not touch things unless you know what they do?
themistress: (bad falcon! lazy!)

[personal profile] themistress 2012-01-27 06:26 am (UTC)(link)
Or... we could just tie you to a pole and let the construction team give you their opinion on that idea.
themistress: (peeking.)

[personal profile] themistress 2012-01-27 06:42 am (UTC)(link)
Hmmn, I suppose you have a point. I'll have to set them to making boxes, just to keep them busy. [That was what she got out his bullshitting. That the construction team needs to stay busy.]

Besides, I imagine that it's really the guards who'd want first crack at you anyway, dear Apprentice.
sandoval: (pic#2157933)

Ah, Apprentice, I have crossed oceans of wank to be with you~... literally and metaphorically

[personal profile] sandoval 2012-01-26 06:10 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, no no no, it is most certainly not the same thing, my dulcet Apprentice. If you were truly dead, I would still be wearing that marvelous little number I concocted before.
sandoval: (Allow me to seduce you)

alskjdflkj sorry it didn't notify my e-mail for some reason... I WOULD HAVE POSTED EARLIER

[personal profile] sandoval 2012-01-27 03:34 am (UTC)(link)
Oh, I'm so glad you agree with me, crumpet. It really was a shame you had to miss it. Perhaps I can model it for you some other time... your next near-death experience, perhaps...?
sandoval: (Poor baby...)

[personal profile] sandoval 2012-01-27 01:44 pm (UTC)(link)
No offense taken. If anything, I'd much prefer to model, ah... how should I say this... "au naturel"...?

Oh, but it's been so hard without you. I do hope you'll wake up soon. And please, call me Sandoval.

[personal profile] little_miss_snarker 2012-01-26 06:14 pm (UTC)(link)
How does someone wind up in a magical coma?

[personal profile] angustifolium 2012-01-26 10:05 pm (UTC)(link)
You have my apologies. Nothing is ever really left alone around here.

[personal profile] angustifolium 2012-01-27 06:14 am (UTC)(link)
I'm sorry. ...For both, I mean. My mun is familiar with your canon, so I kind of am, secondhand? And... honestly, I'm surprised that you... put up with things like you did.

[personal profile] angustifolium 2012-01-27 06:36 am (UTC)(link)
I'm a behavioural analyst, so I can tell you that that is a very manipulative and unhealthy relationship. You might have been ransomed, but that doesn't mean that you owe life or allegiance on the off chance that something good might happen.