Oh Meet The Pyro. Bringing out all the fun castmates...

[not_onyourside]

NON! I do not want to sit here and chat with all zhe new Pyros.

Eet will not be Character Development or whatever nonsense word you are zhrowing around. Eet ees virtual suicide and I will have no part een eet.

Comments

[hasstandards]

I don't even know where that is.

[not_onyourside]

Brazil.

Souzh America.

[Wait. This is Sniper. Better get even more specific. He points in a vaguely southern direction.]

A few zhousand miles zhat way.

[hasstandards]

By the time we got down there, we'd end up havin' to come back. I don't think measures are that drastic.

[not_onyourside]

You are not zhe one zhey enjoy setting on fire.

[hasstandards]

Alright, so maybe they are that drastic. At least there aren't a lot of BLU ones around here.

[Not that the RED ones are any saner at times.]

[not_onyourside]

Even one ees too many.

[hasstandards]

That one isn't so bad, honestly. So long as you behave.

[not_onyourside]

Eet tried to keep me as a pet. I'd prefer to avoid zhat experience.

[And probably would have force fed him cupcakes or something if she hadn't wandered off.]

[hasstandards]

[He's trying to wipe that smirk off his face.]

And least she would've kept you warm.

[not_onyourside]

Zhat ees not funny.

[hasstandards]

And I'll bet the two of you could talk about masks. You've got that much in common.

[not_onyourside]

...

You are not my favorite person right now.

[hasstandards]

Oh, come on. I'll bet we could glue a horn to your head and you could be the pony from the film.

[And now he's laughing.]

[not_onyourside]

[Oh how he hates you.]

I do not want to match your dog eared jacket.

[hasstandards]

I don't blame ya there, but don't worry. I'll bet you'll warm up to the idea pretty quick when you see what good care you're gonna receive from your new best mate.

[Such a good friend.]

[not_onyourside]

Eef by care you mean being tied to a bench, and new best mate you mean someone who mumbles while trying to feed me cookies.

I like zhe plan where I go to Rio much better.

[hasstandards]

Fine. Go to Rio. You've got enough money for a ticket.

[not_onyourside]

Maybe I will. I will send you a postcard of all zhe fun I am having.

[Or maybe not. You know what's really difficult to get when you're technically dead? A passport.]

[hasstandards]

I'm sure every other line will be you whingin' about 'ow lonely you are.

[not_onyourside]

Eet will not be. I am confident I can find someone to entertain me.

[hasstandards]

I don't want to know what you mean by that, do I?

[not_onyourside]

I will send you pictures.

[hasstandards]

No. I don't want to know what you mean by that, then.

[not_onyourside]

You cannot stand to see me happy can you?

[hasstandards]

S'not that. I'm just not interested in how you occupy your time when you're on a holiday.