Unhappy Spy is a dangerous Spy.

[not_onyourside]

I do not like zhis place anymore. Take me back to zhe ozzer one. Zhat was better. Everyone here ees cranky and irritable.

And zhey keep secrets from me. No one keeps secrets from me.

No one.

Comments

[hasstandards]

I know a little about that. Not much, though. Guess I could ask Truckie.

[He leans forward and sets his head atop his hat.]

I guess it's good I've got people here who know what they're doin'. I'd muck this up on my own.

[not_onyourside]

[He reaches over and pats Sniper's shoulder.]

You would do fine, eet would just take longer. You just need to learn to stop hiding everyzzing you are feeling.

[hasstandards]

I don't hide everything. Just feelings. They've got no place with a professional like me.

[not_onyourside]

So you hide everyzzing zhen.

You cannot hide zhem forever. One day you will explode.

[hasstandards]

[He smirks, something about the idea of exploding with feelings striking some oddly funny chord in him at that moment.]

I'm not gonna explode. Go on. Ask me anything. I'll show ya I don't hide everything.

[not_onyourside]

Anyzzing? Hmm.

[He's thinking hard, better not waste that opportunity.]

Why do you and Pyro not share living quarters?

[hasstandards]

S'not proper of us, mate. Besides that, the whole team'd know about us if we shared the same room.

[not_onyourside]

Ah, zhere ees a better question. Why do you not want zhe rest of zhe team to know? And do not tell me eets not professional or eet ees not proper. What ees zhe real reason?

[hasstandards]

[He actually looks like he thinks about this one. Or maybe he's fighting off a headache. They kind of look the same.]

I think about what Medic might do. A girl he liked with a bloke like me rather than him- s'like salt on a wound every time someone mentions it. There's only so much a' that a man can take.

And even if that weren't the case, she's, um. [He runs a hand through his hair, scratching his head.] Well, I'm kind of old for her. I'm not old, but for her, yeah.

[not_onyourside]

Ah. Zhat -- ees more zhoughtful zhan I expected.

[He hadn't considered Medic at all when encouraging RED towards Pyro, it was a delicate situation all around. He'd have to think about that some more.]

You are not zhat old for her. Eef she does not zhink so anyway.

Hmm. I suppose zhat ees two questions. Do I owe you one now?

[hasstandards]

Oh. I guess.

[He thinks, trying to formulate a question in his mind.]

Are you ever unhappy, mate? With bein' here.

[not_onyourside]

All zhe time. Believe what you may, but I do not enjoy killing people, and I do not like being lonely.

But since my options were come here wez zhe hope eet would not be so bad, or waste away een prison, chipping away at my life sentence, I zhink I picked zhe better option.

[hasstandards]

Ah.

[He looks like he regrets asking that question now.]

[not_onyourside]

[He smiles and puts an arm around Sniper's shoulder.]

Do not look so downcast. I am glad to be here.

[He gets up to go check on his cooking, taking the lid off and stirring it. Smell that Sniper? That's the smell of deliciousness.]

[hasstandards]

[It does smell good, but he still looks downtrodden.]

Would ya change things if you could?

[not_onyourside]

Change zhings now? Non. I like where I am now. Wez zhe exception of Medic I enjoy my team here. Zhe laborer ees civil, Scout can be entertaining, and you let me cook for you and drag you on adventures. Eet ees far better zhan I ever expected.

[hasstandards]

But they're still not good enough. Not as good as they could be.

[not_onyourside]

Our teammates? What would you razzer zhem do?

[hasstandards]

I meant things. All this.

[He fiddles with his hat, struggling to piece together exactly what he means.]

I mean that if ya could just take back the mistakes you made, would you?

[not_onyourside]

[He replaces the lid of the pan, leaning against the counter with his arms crossed and staring intently at the floor.

Would he change all his mistakes? He almost responded immediately with a resounding yes, but the more he thought about it the less sure he was. What would have happened had things transpired differently, would they have been better or incredibly, incredibly worse.]

Non. I do not zhink I would. I would like to zhink I learned from my mistakes and eet has made me better. Especially having met zhe ozzer Spies zhat work for zhis company; egotistical, cold, calculating, wezzout any substance or morals. I can see myself from a long time ago een zhem. I was heading zhat way before --- well before I was caught. And I am glad zhat I did not become like zhat.

Een fact zhe reason I was caught at all was my own arrogance. Oui I would have done anyzzing to avoid prison, but eef zhat was what was needed, zhen -- Zhen zhat was what needed to happen.

[hasstandards]

[Sniper watches him, trying to understand through the veil of intoxication. He's always been one who believed experiences shaped a person, made them who they were, and that was for the best. Had he not taken that first shot, or had his dog not been killed, he wouldn't be where he was, neither with RED nor having that conversation. It showed him his path in life: what he was best at, and what he was meant to do.

And still, while he wouldn't take any of it back, he can't help but wonder sometimes how things could have been if he'd not pulled the trigger that day, whether they would have been better or worse.

He tears his eyes from Spy and fidgets with his hat again, unsure of what to say.]

[not_onyourside]

You are razzer introspective when you have been drinking.

[The buzzer of the oven sounds, signaling a welcome lull in the conversation. He smiles softly, still lost in his own thoughts as he grabs two plates and dishes the food up.]

And what would you care to drink wez dinner?

[hasstandards]

I don't suppose beer is the right answer, is it?

[not_onyourside]

Non. Try again.

[hasstandards]

Hn. Water, then.