On being chipped

[deadpoet]

Hello, I've got a idea. Rather than wait all those episodes for those government bastards to play around with my head, how about you go and leave me unchipped. You get the big bad me, I get to do whatever I like without a bloody killer migraine whenever I find myself feeling a little peckish. Everybody wins. Maybe not the blokes that get killed, but I can't say I really give a damn about them.

Better yet, let's go a bit before that where I still have that nice shiny ring. That way when you send me into that personal hell with two slayers, I don't find myself filling a Hoover within a week.

Comments

[herotypical]

Luceti? Your personal hell?

It's actually only a little bit hellish. But...possibly a little too personal.

[ some day, the penny will drop. the canon point shaped penny. ]

[deadpoet]

Right. Personal hell would be asking too much, wouldn't it? I'd rather not have to share it with you.

[herotypical]

It is a little greedy. Over-reaching. Ambit--

Wait. What? You wouldn't? Huh?

[ colour her confused. i mean, sure...not having hell wished upon her is cool and all but she's not sure how she feels about this sudden indifference. ]

[deadpoet]

Fancy that, not wanting to get myself staked. Tell you what, there's two of you there now. So if one of you gets bored, you can have at each other. Throw in a bit of mud and rain and you could sell tickets.

[herotypical]

I'm not going to st--

Oh, that is a crossed line too far.

[deadpoet]

Is it? Here I thought I'd managed that when I tried to kill your precious boyfriend. Or all your other little friends.

1/2

[herotypical]

I think we can all be very relieved when I say that's well beh--

2/3 i lied

[herotypical]

[ wait a tic. ]

3/3

[herotypical]

That's...not so well behind us, is it? Not actually?

Not for you?

[ and that, my friends, is the sound of the aforementioned penny dropping an awfully long way.

awh, crap. ]

[touchofrogue]

First mistake: Askin' your mun ta be nice to you.

[Her mun knows this guy. No way, Spike. There's just no way.]

[deadpoet]

Well I bloody well know there's not point lodging threats. I've seen enough of these dumb bastards try that already.

[touchofrogue]

But not enough to realize that ya really can't change their minds.

[deadpoet]

Can't blame a bloke for trying. Besides, invincible vampire with a ring. It's a sure win.

[touchofrogue]

[... invincible vampire. Great. Her mun has her talk to the nicest people.]

...reckon he didn't mention the power cap, huh?

[deadpoet]

Oh, I heard all about that. Real nice too. Slayer at half strength sounds lovely, save that I'll be punching like a sissy too. Seems the only ones who do good by that are the average joes. A real pain in the backside, if you ask me.

[touchofrogue]

So ya also know there's no point in askin' ta be "invincible."

[hismasterpiece]

Spike! It will only be the best of hells with you here, sweet nothing. And your poor Dru has energies that need to be spent.

[deadpoet]

[Hello then, what's this. Dru giving him the time of day? This is a new development.]

Well, you know I'm all about spending energy, Dru. The mun didn't bother to mention you'd be there.

[abidinglaw]

Well don't you sound like a ray of sunshine.

[deadpoet]

I wouldn't know. Haven't seen too many of those around lately.

[abidinglaw]

Been skulking about in the dark then, have we? I am shocked.

Truly.

You see? This is the face of a man who has been shocked.

[deadpoet]

Seems to me it looks more like the face of a man with his breeches done up a bit too tight.

[abidinglaw]

And as we have previously established, your eyes are not to be relied upon.

[deadpoet]

So is that it, then? Fancied you'd come and give a review of my personality while I'm stuck being all bark?

[abidinglaw]

Oh, so this is your bark is it? This? This is it? All of it?

Good grief.