Voice Testing

[collateraldamage]

H-Hey now, lets not be so hasty.

It's only natural to be drawn to someone with such natural raw charisma and charm as me, but you should think a bit more before sending me to a town I can't get out of... What if they've seen the posters of me or heard of the reward? It doesn't even bear thinking about! I'd be trapped and with everybody wanting an extra sixty billion double dollars, they probably wouldn't even notice the horrible things that happened all the--

[Wait a second! Vash pauses in the middle of working himself up towards a full-blown tearful plea for his life. Horrible things? Danger? Fair maidens in danger?]

...

Maybe you're right! I am definitely the man for the job. When I think about all those poor defenceless beautiful women in need of someone manly and heroic to swoop in and save them... DON'T WORRY LADIES, I'M ON MY WAY!!

Comments

[materia_medica]

There's nothing to talk about.

Quite frankly your overzealous demeanor does not imply you are capable of monogamy. But I am making assumptions. Perhaps you already have wives and wish to add me to the list.

[collateraldamage]

I don't have any wives, miss, you'd be the only one for me. I can feel it already that our future is being mapped out as one, can't you?

[materia_medica]

No actually, I can't.

How exactly does blindly picking the first life form to come into contact with you constitute me as an adequate mate?

[collateraldamage]

I would never do that!

[SO SHOCKED!]

You're not just any life form, miss, you're a beautiful and pure one too.

[materia_medica]

Again, how do you know this?

[You are kind of stupidly entertaining. She was bored anyway so she will play along]

How do you know any of this?

[collateraldamage]

The elusive mayfly of love has guided us together, how could I not know?

[materia_medica]

You are... strange. Or delusional. [or just stupid. She is betting her money on stupid]

Were you expecting a mate to present herself just now?

[If he was superstitious and waiting for something then that might explain it. Still stupid but a little more respectable than just being a ditz]

[collateraldamage]

[Giving an awkward sort of chuckle now.]

We seem to have got off on the wrong foot, miss, is there anything I can do to correct this false bad impression of me?

[materia_medica]

[Huh, he had manners now? Very interesting...]

You could introduce yourself for one. It's a sad idea to insinuate marriage with me and not even tell me your name.

[she'd make a quip about 'didn't they teach you that in finishing school?' but she had a feeling he would look at her dumbly and ask what that was]

1/3

[collateraldamage]

My name...?

[collateraldamage]

O-Oh right! My name, how silly of me, ahahaha!

[collateraldamage]

[Drawing himself up and striking a pose, muscles flexed.]

I am Valentinez Alkalinella Xifax Sicidabohertz Gombigobilla Blue Stradivari Talentrent Pierre Andri Charton-Haymoss Ivanovici Baldeus George Doitzel Kaiser III.

[materia_medica]

[Oh damn. She thought he was on to something there. Still a stupid frat boy type who joked around. She stopped listening around 'Blue']

Those names are all from different nationalities. And Blue? Really?

And I was taking you seriously for a second there.

[collateraldamage]

[He deflates as though she's pricked him, shoulders slumping.]

I was being serious.

[materia_medica]

You can't possibly have a need for all those names.

You have to be compensating for something.

[collateraldamage]

A man as great and manly as I am, cannot be contained by only one name!

[materia_medica]

It's a bit overwhelming.

[...oh wait. She hadn't thought of something]

Do you change your name often? To cover up past offenses? [genuinely curious, she asks without a hint of shame at possibly humiliating him or making him feel awkward]

[collateraldamage]

Offences?!

[Did that come out in a squeak? He'll just cover it up with a not at all conspicuous laugh.]

AHAHAHAHAHA!

[materia_medica]

Oh so I was right!

[collateraldamage]

...I'm just a wanderer in pursuit of the elusive mayfly of love!

[materia_medica]

[She pouted]

We were getting somewhere there!

[So this guy was probably a serial murderer. He was playing stupid, right?]

[collateraldamage]

Hey... it's not very nice to assume I'm lying, you know! I really am a wanderer in pursuit of love and peace.

[materia_medica]

I never said you were lying, just that we were getting somewhere more telling when we discussed your names.

[She was still trying to figure him out and determine how much danger she was likely in at the moment... she did have a medical scalpel in her bag if she needed to defend herself but so far this guy just seemed kinda airheaded rather than dangerous.]

[collateraldamage]

Why worry about where we're getting to, when the journey is so much fun with good company?

[materia_medica]

...You confuse me.

[And she still didn't even know what to call him. What was his deal?]