boredddd

[open_door]

Is it really that much to ask that a beautiful princess - or prince! I would never discriminate! - be available in the memes? My dearest mun, I'm sure you know I'm not just hanging around these places for my health!

Maybe we should start a list of all my good qualities! There are so many, I don't know where to begin.

Comments

[intotheopenair]

How about wi' a 'no'?

[open_door]

How about what now? [it's so hard to tell if she's a princess given the amount of hair on her person, but he has his hopes up]

[intotheopenair]

This Princess wants nothin' tae do wi' you.

[open_door]

[She said the magic word!!]

My dear Princess!

[Low, handsome bow. Look at him. Really. Isn't he just the Most Handsome Prince You've Ever Seen (TM)?]

I wasn't aware I was in the presence of royalty.

[sellsthneeds]

Let me know if that works on the ladies, man.

[open_door]

[.....guy doesn't look like royalty, but Hans has seen some shit in these places, so benefit of the doubt.]

I'm certainly open to better solutions...

[sellsthneeds]

*Not royalty, just an inventor and salesman. Once was old school Southern thanks to his mother. Very old school.*

You compliment her, introduce yourself----you are supposed to talk about her and not you.

[lighttoyourlair]

Wow, I can't believe you aren't having to fight them off!

[open_door]

Hah, well, I don't think fighting royals off has ever been on my bucket list, to be honest.

[cursedtosleep]

And, what would you do with a princess or prince, your highness?

[open_door]

I am merely a man, looking for love. [in all the wrong plaaaaces~]

[cursedtosleep]

Well I wish you the very best luck in your endeavors, your highness. I take it, you can only marry a princess. [Or a prince, as well, it would seem.]

[onebadapple]

Oh! I'm sure you have many good qualities! [Snow- Snow no.]

[open_door]

[yes Snow. YES.]

That's very sweet of you to say. [He takes her hand, bowing, and kisses it.] Coming from such a beautiful lady, it means that much more to me.

[onebadapple]

[She giggles.] Oh you're just so sweet. But what someone looks like shouldn't change what they say. [Says the fairest of them all... still she has a point.]

[heartwarmth]

How about you never had any to begin with?

[open_door]

!!! [oh shit] Oh, ah, hello, Anna! It's so good to see you! [sweat, sweat, sweat]

[heartwarmth]

[It'sssss Johnny! Anna!]

Yeah, not sure if I believe that. [She crosses her arms, fixing a steely gaze at the prince.] If anything, now's the perfect time to be completely honest with me, Hans.

[shoulda_toined]

(You are so lucky Bugs is already doing the "crossdressing to mess with a womanizer" schitck elsewhere.)

Eh, don't call us, we'll call you.

Stupid Sexy Sociopath Shenanigans? :3

[shhhhh_secret]

(Makes a show of checking Hans out. While Spy does play for both teams in that sense of the phrase, he's mostly just being a dick.)

Pass. Not enteresting enough of an accent.

sorry for the wait!

[open_door]

Not---what? Are you even a prince? [i.e. are you even worth my time rn]

no worries

[shhhhh_secret]

Whezer I have royal blood in my family line ez irrelevant to my line of work. Et ez more important to be well connected.

(He makes the "well connected" sound like a euphemism for sex--making anything sound like a euphemism for sex is one of Spy's many talents.)

I'll pretend I wasn't late for this...>>

[ingratiating]

...A princess? Or a prince?

[ Look at that face of digust, tiny Hans is giving it, while also wary of how much this guy looked strikingly like he could be a relative of his. ]

haha I'll pretend I wasn't late for your late!

[open_door]

[Now this is interesting!! Hans would never forget how adorable he looked as a child! Why, even he wanted to pinch his own cheeks.]

Yes. Royalty and kingdoms. That's what it boils down to. Why should I limit myself to just one gender?

[ingratiating]

I didn't mean that you should, but...can that actually happen? Princes being together like that? What about having the next heir to the throne? The family line doesn't last long if there aren't any.