boredddd

[open_door]

Is it really that much to ask that a beautiful princess - or prince! I would never discriminate! - be available in the memes? My dearest mun, I'm sure you know I'm not just hanging around these places for my health!

Maybe we should start a list of all my good qualities! There are so many, I don't know where to begin.

Comments

[intotheopenair]

How about wi' a 'no'?

[open_door]

How about what now? [it's so hard to tell if she's a princess given the amount of hair on her person, but he has his hopes up]

[intotheopenair]

This Princess wants nothin' tae do wi' you.

[open_door]

[She said the magic word!!]

My dear Princess!

[Low, handsome bow. Look at him. Really. Isn't he just the Most Handsome Prince You've Ever Seen (TM)?]

I wasn't aware I was in the presence of royalty.

[intotheopenair]

[...]

What are ye doin'?

[open_door]

[Aaand here, have the good prince reaching for the fair princess's hand to kiss it.]

My mun hadn't informed me that I would be meeting someone so beautiful today. I'm so sorry that my introduction has to be like this. It makes me seem desperate or something. Really, I'm just searching for The One.

[Kisssss to her hand.]

My name is Prince Hans of the Southern Isles. May I have the honor of your name?

[intotheopenair]

[Okay that hand is getting yanked out of the way because NO NO NO.]

The one what? One tae lock ye where ye belong?

[Seriously! What is with the hand-kissing?]

Merida. First born of Clan DunBroch.

[open_door]

To lock me where now?

[A hesitant laugh. Has his 'fame' preceded him?]

Princess Merida. What a pleasure.

[He thinks. Really, he can't be sure yet.]

[intotheopenair]

In jail, or whatever ye've got that counts fer that. That's how they deal wi' scunners like you, isn't it?

[Eyes narrow]

Can't say the same.

[open_door]

Sc-scunners? Scunners? I'm...not familiar with the term...

[intotheopenair]

Ejits? Numpties? Devils? What names could I give someone who tries tae trick a lass intae marryin' him.

[She crosses her arms, giving a hard look]

Willnae work wi' me.

[open_door]

A-ah, well, you must be mistaken. [She isn't.] I would never trick anyone into anything. [He would. And did.] You wound me with such an accusation, Princess.

[intotheopenair]

Oh aye, is that so?

[She's almost amused by the way he's playing this]

That why ye were askin' yer mun to only introduce you to more princesses then?

[open_door]

Oh, well...

[No. No, he won't let her best him in this!]

...That's only because my family would disapprove of me marrying anyone who wasn't royalty, you see.

[intotheopenair]

An' are ye lookin' to be wed right now?

[She's giving him a look of not really believing you]

[sellsthneeds]

Let me know if that works on the ladies, man.

[open_door]

[.....guy doesn't look like royalty, but Hans has seen some shit in these places, so benefit of the doubt.]

I'm certainly open to better solutions...

[sellsthneeds]

*Not royalty, just an inventor and salesman. Once was old school Southern thanks to his mother. Very old school.*

You compliment her, introduce yourself----you are supposed to talk about her and not you.

[open_door]

To be honest, talking about her would be preferable.

[Because lies are hard to keep track of sometimes.]

You're very wise about women. Are you involved?

[sellsthneeds]

I listen to my mother.

*Terrifying words, for those who knew her.*


Yeah, no, having to take a break right now until the whole Thneed business takes off. Then there'll be time to do the whole family thing.

*Once had his heart set on the whole white picket fence, Leave it to Beaver life.*

[lighttoyourlair]

Wow, I can't believe you aren't having to fight them off!

[cursedtosleep]

And, what would you do with a princess or prince, your highness?

[onebadapple]

Oh! I'm sure you have many good qualities! [Snow- Snow no.]

[open_door]

[yes Snow. YES.]

That's very sweet of you to say. [He takes her hand, bowing, and kisses it.] Coming from such a beautiful lady, it means that much more to me.

[open_door]

Always looking, I'm afraid. [Melodramatic sigh.]