On making a Crack character

[dadimrighthere]

...This is the opposite of funny.

I'm telling Mom.

Comments

[rebelscumfather]

[Oh, this ought to be good]

Tell her what, kid?

[dadimrighthere]

Oh great. You're here, too.

[As if they don't live in the same house.]

This...this...Mundane...thinks this is all some huge joke. I take myself very seriously, I'll have you know.

[rebelscumfather]

That must bring the total up to ... [His eyes glance up thoughtfully like he's trying to count in his head] ... one.

[dadimrighthere]

Does literally anyone but you think you're funny?

[HOW DARE YOU. Kylo's cold stare shall pierce the night with its intensity of hatred. Or, you know, his teenage sulk that makes him look threatening to exactly no one.]

[neverjoinyou]

How old are you?

omg <3

[dadimrighthere]

I can't tell if you're a girl or a boy.

And why is this your business?

[neverjoinyou]

It's true, I look a lot like your mother.

ILU \o/

[dadimrighthere]

Don't talk shit about my Mom, kid.

[Or what? You'll fail at force-choking this guy so badly he thinks you're giving him a hug?]

[jarvisconsole]

Is your mother missing, sir?

[Says the computer console nearby in a dry wit British accent.]

[dadimrighthere]

[The computer console is immediately Kylo's favorite entity here for a number of reasons. It has an Imperial accent, it called him 'sir', and it cares about his mother.]

What? No. She's working late tonight.

It's this Mun. Treating me like a joke.

[Because he is.]

[jarvisconsole]

[Its the closest thing to C3PO around as well.]

Perhaps you will have ample opportunity of proving them wrong in this regard? 'All the world's a stage and all the men and women merely players'.

William Shakespeare; 1599

[dadimrighthere]

[C3PO is a complicated thing. On the one hand, Ben wants to hate the droid. On the other, Grandpa Vader made him, so he feels obligated to love it.]

I like you. You will be spared when it is time to lay waste to this place.

[Ben, leaving a nasty review on Yelp! isn't going to lay waste to anything.]

[dorkvader]

That's pretty funny.

[dadimrighthere]

[That sound was not Kylo Ren, dark knight and fearsome Sith wannabe squeaking. You must be hearing things.

Can't even be mad that someone is taking a dig at him. Because that someone is Darth Freaking Vader.]

I try to do you proud.

[dorkvader]

[Yeah, he's pretty awe inspiring. Dark Lord of the Sith, slayer of Jedi and all.]

You should try harder.

[isatraitor]

Shhh ... I haven't coaxed the silicon worm over yet.

[dadimrighthere]

Kid what are you even doing?

[supoepilot]

I don't know. This seems hilarious to us. (Meaning his mun and himself.)

[dadimrighthere]

[This is Ben Kylo Ren seething, Poe. How dare his father enjoy talking about flying with you over his own son. Not..not that Kylo wants his dad's attention.]

I really hate you.

[supoepilot]

(Here's an eyebrow raise. Boy, it really doesn't take much to get him seething. It also just means he's egging Poe on.)

Hate? Well, isn't that a tad too strong of a word to be throwing around so lightly? It's like I destroyed everything just by existing...

(Not like he's overly fond of you either, Ben.)

When, y'know, I didn't. You're doing that all on your own, bud. Also, about the flying, just...I don't know...stop snarking all time and acting like you gotta fight or something.

[rebelscumfather]

Don't waste your breath, Dameron. It's default behavior for him to feel sorry for himself about something.

[supoepilot]

I, uh, found out too late that reason doesn't work with this one. So, for future reference - got it.

(Seriously? How do you handle this?)

[notimeforsorrow]

Tell me what?

[dadimrighthere]

Mom!

[He's all prim and proper now. Smile for Mom, Ben.]

Arguing with the mun here. Seems to think it's funny to treat our family like a joke.

[notimeforsorrow]

[Mommy's here for you, Ben.]

Ignore them. It's not your fault that they have such a faulty sense of humor.

[She reached up to stroke his hair.]

How are you, dear?