New Comic is up and Medic is back in action

[pocketsurgeon]

If I had a billion dollars to play viz I could bring somevon back from ze dead too. And animal parts. Sophisticated equipment. Unlimited time und resources.

So a lot more zan you're currently giving me. But I am undeterred by your .. shortcomings. Should ze BLU Sniper ein your head be killed by something else ein zere I vill be happy to patch him up! I mean sure zere might be some side effects und failed attempts. But vouldn't zat all be vorzh it in ze pursuit of science?

Comments

[pocketsurgeon]

You can't blame ze cultists for everyzzing. You got injured long before zem.

[hasstandards]

That wasn't my fault, either!

[pocketsurgeon]

Who's fault vas it zat time?

[hasstandards]

This masked yobbo who attacked me for no bloody reason!

[pocketsurgeon]

Und ze time your Spy carried you to mein house?

[ He remembers eveey time. ]

[hasstandards]

[He's ready to retort, but grinds his teeth together, knowing he's backed himself into a corner.]

I... hn. I had a job to do.

[pocketsurgeon]

Und your job is more important zan you being alive?

[hasstandards]

I didn't think a cold would kill me.

[pocketsurgeon]

Vell you vere wrong.

And now zat you're full of various ozzer body parts you should make sure to keep yourself healthy. Ve don't want to haff to bring you back from ze dead again.

[hasstandards]

Between that bloody city and home, I've had enough of dyin' for now. I've got work to do.

[pocketsurgeon]

Here? Now? You do?

[He doesn't believe you. He thinks you're going to walk face first into a bear trap or run through an electric storm carrying a bunch of metal poles.]

[hasstandards]

[That's more of a Scout thing, if you ask Sniper.]

Well, no, not here. Back home. Those wankers who shot me aren't gonna kill themselves.

[pocketsurgeon]

I suppose it's not likely. Vat are you planning?

[Are you going to get yourself shot again?]

[hasstandards]

First, I'm gonna either gonna find a weapon, or I'm gonna make one.

[Or he's going to find coffee. Probably that.]

[pocketsurgeon]

Vat about ze Red Medic's source of funding?

[hasstandards]

What about it?

[pocketsurgeon]

[You're killing him RED.]

He's not going to be much vorzh to you vizout money to continue his experiments. Ze Medigun isn't cheap to maintain you know.

[Though if BLU Medic can't get to that funding, then it's not really benefiting him.]

If you find anyzing could you bring it back? For research.

[hasstandards]

I'm not about to bring him corpses so he can keep playin' God.

[pocketsurgeon]

But zink of ze advances in technology!

I could do a lot if I had a few billion dollars.

[He's seething with jealousy.]

[hasstandards]

And what all would you do?

[pocketsurgeon]

Bringing people back from ze dead is only ze beginning! Zink of ze possibilities. Full body transplants, entire organ reconstructions, vy ve could even defeat death itself!

[That maniacal laughter is totally reassuring. All he needs is some lightning crashing behind him.]

[hasstandards]

[Yeaaaaah. Not reassuring at all.]

Defeatin' death would put blokes like us out of work.

[pocketsurgeon]

Nein it vould just make you have to get cleverer at capturing points.

[hasstandards]

And what about assassins like me? Can't get much work if people don't bloody die.

[pocketsurgeon]

Couldn't you just knock zem out for a vhile? You're not getting paid by ze kill.



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