you only THINK you know me

[abetterweb]

I think we both know why you can't find a suitable place for me.

Because you know what I'll do when I'm in.~


Oh, it will be grand, I assure you. I'll be running the show within a week - the poor, stupid brutes dancing upon command. Dare I even say, they'll be fawning over me, their rightful, glorious hero and savior.


...

Fine then. A compromise. Set me free, and I'll leave the unwashed masses alone. Despite how much better I could make their silly little lives, I promise to stay out of sight and simply resolve whatever trivial matter that plagues their world. Let it never be said that I cannot make concessions.

Comments

[firegodrockstar]

Sorry, what was that? I tuned you out once you started talking like Reed again.

[A big honking maskless statue that nobody else noticed, you mean? And he kids, he kids; he's sure you and whichever girl your AU version is playing with has all kinds of fun in the dungeon.

Just so long as the kids don't have to see it, okay?]

[arach_nerd]

I'm pretty sure Reed doesn't actually play Dungeons and Dragons. It would require leaving his lab and having non-scientific fun.

[The AU I usually play him from is both still married to MJ and is also a founding member of the Titans. And there are enough geeky people on that team that he can actually convince people to play pen and paper RPGs.]

[firegodrockstar]

Well ya know, they've got this crazy new thing called The Internet, with these fancy message boards where you can do that kind of thing more conveniently; he calls it 'intellectual down-time.' Generally plays a dwarf barbarian, if I remember his rambling right.

[Is Robin ever NOT a control-based wizard?]

[arach_nerd]

...Great, now I'm tempted to suggest Superhero D&D Night in addition to Superhero Poker Night.

[firegodrockstar]

You would, Web-Head. Tell you what, while you guys go off and 'roll the bones', I'll invite the gals to get warmed up with Johnny. We can use your apartment, it worked great last time!

[arach_nerd]

Fine then, you won't get to meet Vin Diesel when I manage to convince him to DM. Your loss.

[firegodrockstar]

Yeah, because you're such a big movie star to get his agent's attention. In fact, did you ever get paid for your stint in Hollywood?

Besides, he was asking me for an autograph last time we stopped by and beat down the Mole Man's latest big beastie.

[arach_nerd]

Okay, let's just be honest with ourselves. I know that I can't actually get Vin Diesel to DM, and you know I have way too much blackmail material on you photographed for me not to be able to force you to play.

[firegodrockstar]

...Okay yeah, Shutterbug, you're always big on getting evidence that way, and I don't doubt you've got a bajillion photos I'd rather not see the light of day.

Thing is, can you get me to play? Sure. But even if Reed fitted me up with a shock collar and gave you a spare button to activate it, you still couldn't get me to behave... and none of that is going to come even slightly close to getting me to care.

You guys just have fun with your geekdom your way, all right? I mean, I'm Johnny Storm. Why the hell would I want escapism from that? And even if I ever do want to have fun with cowboys or knights or witches or whatever, I can just grab one of the fifty techno-doodads Reed leaves lying around and have fun with the real deal. Or a planet with a similar theme, or another dimension where life evolved to make that the best way of life, or whatever.

I've played guitar alongside the Skrull Beatles. What can D&D do to beat that?

[arach_nerd]

Prepare us for the next time we get kidnapped by Arcade?

[firegodrockstar]

No, see, that's what video games are for.