On certain castmate reserve~

[2cool4guardian]

Do you have to look so happy? It's just a reserve. Maybe the Vogons won't let him in. Ever thought that aliens could be allergic to rabbit fur, mmh?

[By now, Jack, they've become allergic to snow.]

Also, for the record? I'm absolutely not "tsun-ing". ...whatever that is.

[Translation: the idiot is as happy as his mun.]

Comments

[myownhand]

[Oh you want to play dirty. She'll screw with you back--]

No, I'd just rather not know what happens after older Jamie [Yes your Jamie] does when he shoves girls up against walls and kisses em' t'shut em' up.


[This is a true conversation that happened. and you probably don't want to know how it got to that point.


Besides the fact that she may have shoved one of the very many one of you up against a wall and kissed you to shut you up.

Don't worry. You aren't in danger of that.





Yet. ಠ_ಠ]

[2cool4guardian]

[Blink, blink.]

Err, yeah? He's a boy. That's what boys do. They grow up, kiss girls (or other boys) and lose their virginity in the backseat of their cars.

[See, Mer, people and sex don't bother Jack. He's lived for too long and seen too many kids growing up so damn fast. No, what it bothers Jack is his fellow Guardians and sex. Because... eww.]

But why would you--?

[Wait. Squinting his eyes. Then he starts laughing.]

That's my boy!

[He does, actually. Spill the deets. And stay away from him you crazy redhead]

[myownhand]

He didn't lay a finger on me. [Really.] Asked me how old I was and after that one of you intervened.

[ಠ_ಠ And now this look. Actually it's always been this look. Let's be real.]

And I'm not interested anyway. Met him when he was 8 first. It's just weird after that.

[Also he heard she was 16 and was like N O P E.

So wait... how did that topic come up....]

[2cool4guardian]

[Merida used Mean Look! ...It's not very effective.]

How is that weird? You didn't watch him grow up. Lots of childhood friends end up married - want me tell you about my headmate?

[Jack, no, she's embarrassed enough without your intervention.]

Jamie likes fables and myths. I bet a bear princess would be perfect for him.

[Actually he isn't sure Merida's temper is one to go for Jamie but he can't let go of the teasing now.]

1/3

[myownhand]

I know he does, but he seems t'be a bit too enamored with you t'pay me any notice.

[myownhand]

[...]

Also he asked Pitch out on a date.

[myownhand]

[......]

And he also thinks Pitch has a crush on me.

[Can you tell how traumatizing these past few days have been for mer? :,D]

1/3 back at ya

[2cool4guardian]

He isn't enamored, I'm his hero! No girl won't take away that.

[2cool4guardian]

He-- what?

[Congratulations, you finally managed to broke his brain.

It takes a moment for the information to register, and when it does he frowns and tightens the hold on his staff.

Does he have to kick some boogeyman ass again?]

[2cool4guardian]

[...maybe not.]

I wish the two of you all the happiness and a prosper family life together.

[Keep away that asshole from Jamie. He's counting on you girl!]

[myownhand]

[W O W THANKS JACK.]

Pretty sure Pitch is only interested in me because I'm friends with you.

[WHICH MEANS THIS IS YOOOOUUURRR FAUUUUULLLTTTT.]

And he doesn't like me. Why does everyone try t'tell me who I like, who likes me, and who I should date?

[This is ridiculous, okay?]

[2cool4guardian]

[YOU'RE WELCOME! 8D]

Because you keep making all these funny faces and they're too good to let pass.

[Jack is always in for some easy entertainment.]

Maybe you should start your own version of "The Bachelorette". Your hair alone would get high ratings.

[myownhand]

[After some consultation with the mun on what "The Bachelorette" is--]

I already had that, remember?

[DID YOU WATCH HER MOVIE]

And I ended up choosin' myself.

[Cue innuendo about her username]

[2cool4guardian]

Well, obviously it wasn't enough if now you're starting your own harem here.

[Certain song by Divinyls comes to mind but let's not go there.]

Not that I can blame you for wanting so much of me.

[myownhand]

[S C R E A M I N G]

Th'Jackapocalypse-- [yeah we are calling it that.] --is not my fault.

All of you just like t'get t'gether and chat your cold heads off.

[2cool4guardian]

The "Jackapocalypse"?

[... ...]

I like it. The world needs more Jack Frost. [Because obviously two hundred of them aren't enough1]

[myownhand]

Yes, there was a post on here... there were about five of you? Maybe more?

[She dies a little just thinking about it]

It was a nightmare.