birthday boy wants presents ~

[dealwith_them]

STFU, don't try pull out numbers on me.

You know what they say, doll. Men ripen like alcohol. The older, the better the fucking. Experience and all that shit.

So. Best present this year? A high class hooker. And she better look a-fucking-lot like this. With straw and coke and all. Fucking yum. Don't you just want to fucking eat that? Beats a cake.

Better start working on that, like right now. I'm so horny I'm gonna fucking die.

LOL, I'd rather die fucking.

Comments

[dealwith_them]

Just a shitty envelope, pretty boy. Would make my day.

[centeroftheweb]

Well. I don't thing the birthday fairy will be granting your wishes this year.

1/2

[dealwith_them]

Boo.

[dealwith_them]

I'd have picked you the man to be able to get me a hooker that looks like Jovovich, though. Itsy Bitsy Spidey.

[centeroftheweb]

Could and would are different things, puppy. I'm friends with too many whores to turn them over to your gentle mercies.

[dealwith_them]

Friends with fucking benefits, right? I know girls like that.

[centeroftheweb]

Friends first. Benefits second.

[dealwith_them]

Wouldn't be friends without the benefits, how the world works and all that shit.

[centeroftheweb]

You have an amazing ability to both have and miss the point in a single sentence.

[dealwith_them]

My way with words, take it or leave it. We can't all be fucking brainies like JL's high class whore.

[centeroftheweb]

If he's not paying her, she's not a whore, now is she?

[dealwith_them]

Oh. He's paying her alright.

[centeroftheweb]

Mmm. I suppose so.

[dealwith_them]

Spoiled little rich girl. Real fucking spoiled.

[centeroftheweb]

I would go with entitled, not spoiled.