Seen the new update, couldn't resist a post.

[prpl_assistant]

I know we're probably past words at this point, but...

Good luck mundane. You're going to need it.



...and no, I won't be taking any questions from Scouts.

Comments

[bring_the_beatdown]

Yo! I got a ..... aw man. Jeez.

[prpl_assistant]

There's not much variation in your daily schedule Scout. Just that instead of shooting the RED team, now you get to shoot robots.

[bring_the_beatdown]

Do we get robots too? Shit, what about Engie's hand? Is it gonna like.. get a mind of its own and attack us?

Maybe we should chain it up.

[prpl_assistant]

[Sighs.]

Just this once.

No, we don't get robots. And no, the Engineer's hand will be fine. It was made by the man himself. I'd be surprised if anyone could hack into the Gunslinger.

No more questions.

[bring_the_beatdown]

But I gotta knooooooooooooooooow!

[prpl_assistant]

You'll find out more once the robots are here.

No. Further. Questions.

[bring_the_beatdown]

Why not?

[prpl_assistant]

I'm afraid I can't answer you; that's a question in itself.

[bring_the_beatdown]

Aw man. I thought that was gonna work. Why you gotta be so smart?

So uh.... It's cool if I have Engie make my bat shoot lasers then?

[prpl_assistant]

[Does she look amused Scout?]

Scout.

[Please get the warning in her voice.]

[bring_the_beatdown]

Yeah yeah. No more questions. You're no fun.

[DRAMATIC SIGH ]

Guess I'll just... you know... wait for robots to attack or whatever.

[prpl_assistant]

You don't have to wait long. ETA is this Wednesday.

I wish you all the best, Scout.

[bring_the_beatdown]

No you don't. Bet you don't even care if the robots kill us all.

Not that they will. Because we can so handle this. With our eyes closed. Anyday.

[Someone is a bit scared of death robots. But not him. Nope. Someone he once heard of. Yeah. Total loser that guy is.]

Wednesday? Jeez that's soon.

[prpl_assistant]

It was a rather sudden attack. There was barely enough time to let the teams know about the robots.

[bring_the_beatdown]

Well you don't have nothin' to worry about because man do we got this shit. 'Cept we gotta work with the REDs which freakin' sucks.

I bet I smash way more robots than that RED loser calling himself a Scout.

[prpl_assistant]

Well, a little competition is healthy, but try not to get yourself blown up by the REDs or the robots. BLU doesn't cover you for insurance.

[bring_the_beatdown]

They couldn't hit me if they tried. I'm a freakin' blur man.

[You better hope he doesn't die, or you're gonna face the wrath of his Ma.]

[prpl_assistant]

Right.

[Trying to be neutral but...why does she not believe you? Oh yeah, the footage from Meet the Pyro.]

[bring_the_beatdown]

[ Surprisingly he actually has a brain in that tiny head of his. Granted it's still processing what was said 3 minutes ago, but it's still there.]

Wait. What're ya saying about insurance? Is the respawn not working?

[prpl_assistant]

[Respawn is working, but maybe if it gets Scout to take this seriously...]

We don't know. It might be best for you to be extra vigilant and to put aside your grievances with the RED team for now.

[bring_the_beatdown]

What? WHAT?!?!?!?!?

YOU MEAN I MIGHT ACTUALLY DIE? LIKE FOR REALS??


Not..... not that that would happen. I mean.... it wouldn't happen. Nah man. I'm too awesome for that. Yeah. _Yeah.

[prpl_assistant]

If I may offer a word of advice?

Your ability to work well in a team would contribute significantly to your rate of survival.

Feel free to punch him in his dumb face.

[bring_the_beatdown]

I work awesome in a team.

A team of one.

Though uh.. if you're looking for someone to keep you safe during this invasion I can be a team of two if you know what I'm saying.

[Suggestive leer is go!]

[notintehkitchen]

[Just this icon.]

[prpl_assistant]

Any further questions, Pyro?

[notintehkitchen]

[She wasn't even paying attention. She was looking outside the window at a butterfly.]

Mrrrppphhh!

[prpl_assistant]

[Just. Sighing. And leaving now.]

[bye_to_yer_head]

That's probably a good policy t' 'ave. Yesterday he asked me if th' sky was blue because it was th' reflection of our shirts.

[prpl_assistant]

Oh. Well. He should probably ask the Engineer then.

Do you have any other questions Sniper?

[bye_to_yer_head]

Nah. Won't know till I see 'em I guess. Or start shootin' 'em.

[prpl_assistant]

I'm confident in your abilities, as well as your team mate's and the REDs.

[bye_to_yer_head]

Thanks fer that.

An' where are you gonna be during all this?

*Not that he's concerned or anything.*

[prpl_assistant]

Where the Administrator wants me to be.

[bye_to_yer_head]

Somewhere far away from th' robots I take it?

*He hopes.*

[not_onyourside]

Oh, but I am sure zhe poor boy had so much to ask you.

[prpl_assistant]

I'm sure his team mates can answer his questions.

[not_onyourside]

I almost feel bad for zhem. Almost.

And what do you zhink of our current predicament?