Mun's wanting to...

[easy_a]

Ahahahaha, no.

Wot makes you think I want to go to a game? Because whatever train of thought you're trying to reason that with is retarded. You don't even have a place in mind and you're still wanting to stick me somewhere.

Okay, I get it. You think it'll be fun. Look. Maybe you're okay with the whole, "Oh, let's mess around with everybody's heads and see wot happens, uuuegh," thing, but I'm not. Wot's more, I'm not going to do it, and you'd be daft to think that I'll go ahead with this rubbish. It's bullshit. 'Sides, if you don't even know where to start at all, maybe you shouldn't bother looking in the first place, yeah?


...Are you even listening to me?

Comments

[easy_a]

Or maybe Plan Piss is retarded.

[tripled]

Retarded, not retarded, it still works! He's just a freak of nature!

[easy_a]

Well... I'll agree with you there.

[If you get her drift.]

[tripled]

Oh, don't even go there or I'm going to have to piss all over your tampons, or whatever it is that you ladies like.

[easy_a]

I've already been there. Relax, yeah?

And if you touch anything of mine, I'll get Kelly to kick you in the balls so hard you'll go sterile.

[Maybe if she didn't have her stupid power and didn't have to risk accidental skin-to-skin contact, she'd do it herself.]

[tripled]

Alright, alright! I'll leave your little lady products alone!

I can't risk having this guy out of commission. I've got a tight schedule as it is! These ladies need me.

[easy_a]

You keep telling yourself that, Nathan.

Just remember to actually look at your track record before you go around spreading your crabs.

1/2

[tripled]

Are you suggesting I have a sexually transmitted disease?

2/2

[tripled]

I'll have you know that's curable!

[easy_a]

...That is way more information than I needed.

[tripled]

Well, you brought it on yourself by attempting to ruin my good name! It's not exactly the kind of information that needs to be spread around, alright? It's taken care of! I'm good!

I only sleep with clean women these days! I've learned from my mistakes. And, you know, it could have happened to any one of you!

[easy_a]

Alright, alright.

I always carry rubbers around with me, so unlike you, I don't have that problem. [And she usually goes after the handsome, wealthy-looking fellas who would pay the difference in treatment... yanno, if they didn't want their dirty laundry out for the public to see.]

[tripled]

Well, not all of us can be so prepared!

There's a window! I don't have time to go get a condom, I've got to strike when the time is right or the window could close and chop some very important parts off!

[easy_a]

Like a fetus?

[Bad, Nathan, bad. You're going to knock up all the prostitutes of Wertham.]

[tripled]

Oh, everyone knows that can't happen if you drink a Mountain Dew before the shag! It's a scientifically proven fact!

[easy_a]

Let's be straight here, yeah? I'm not babysitting for you.

[tripled]

Oh, I know. If you were, there'd be some totally hot babysitter fantasies going on here, but instead all it is is blah blah blah, nag nag nag, I've got a stick up my fine arse.

[easy_a]

I do not have a stick up my arse; I just have standards, unlike you.

[tripled]

Okay, I think we've already established that your standards are horribly low.

A weird little guy like Barry's got a beautiful girlfriend and I've got nothing! Life is a cruel mistress.

[easy_a]

M'not that freak's girlfriend. [Yet.]

Where the fuck did you get an idea like that?

[Mun thought an earlier point in series two would make for a decent canon point.]

[tripled]

[WELL THIS MIGHT BE AWKWARD]

Harsh breakup, huh?

It's alright, I'm right here with open arms and a shoulder for you to cry on. No shagging necessary.

Humping encouraged.

[easy_a]

Stop dicking around, Nathan. I've never dated Simon, and I don't plan on starting anytime soon. He's so... creepy.

And I'm not touching you. Won't matter who I choose to date.

[tripled]

I'm not dickin' around! You're the one who's dicking around!

He is a creepy little twat, but you snog him anyway! I saw it, I was there! It's been scarred into my brain, never to be forgotten!

[easy_a]

No, I'm not.

And I'd never kiss him! I don't know what the fuck is wrong with you all of the sudden, but you've gone mental.

More than usual.

[tripled]

Mental? I'm not even shitting you in the slightest! I'm as serious as Alan Rickman, man! You know, the guy from the movies about the little magic twat that could?

You were there, and he was there, and it was just a massive slurry of tongues and hands! It was horrible!