On the lack of a BLU Scout at 3Step.

[quickly]

MUN. YO.

I'm freakin' bored. Wasn't someone supposed t'bring that lamewad copy'a me over t'Paradise? 'Cause it sure didn't happen! I mean, yeah, there's other BLUs around but they're kinda boring. At least that BLU Scout loser tries to put up a fight. I always win 'em, but still. It's somethin' t'do.

Also I'm glad yer lazy ass finally got a new computer, but didja have t'get the slowest shippin' option? 'Cause I will be old and shit when it finally gets here.

Comments

[hasstandards]

What, you can't find someone else to fight with? You're obnoxious. It oughtta be easy for you.

[quickly]

I ain't obnoxious.

Yeah, there are some BLUs at Paradise, but one's a cop and I don't feel like goin' t'jail or anything. Plus, some'a the others are chicks.

[hasstandards]

Right. And you havin' another Scout will help you with all that because...?

[quickly]

[Shrugs]

I guess he'd be most interestin' one t'fight, 'sall.

Hey, you should keep an eye out for the BLU Sniper. He's a cop and I think he's lookin' for someone t'send to jail.

[hasstandards]

He's not the cop. I am. He's a fisherman of some sort.

BEST THING IS, Scout still won't know this in 3Step! :D

[quickly]

Really?

But y'were wearin' blue.

And RED has no idea why people mistake him for BLU. They look nothing alike. Nope. XD

[hasstandards]

It's the uniform. I didn't pick it.

same with Scootles here :o

[quickly]

Couldn't ya dye it or somethin'?

People keep thinking he's brothers with BLU Sniper. Those fools.

[hasstandards]

I don't think you can go from blue to red, mate. I'd end up with a purple shirt, and that's even worse as far as I'm concerned.

hahaha

[quickly]

Purple's better than blue, at least.

What if ya bleach it first? I remember bleachin' some'a my clothes when I was little by accident. Ma was pissed.

[hasstandards]

That might work. I don't know much about laundry.

[quickly]

Figures y'don't.

No offense, man, but yer clothes kinda look a little grungy, if ya know what I mean.

[hasstandards]

I'm aware.

[Because his mother has told him so. And so has Pyro. And Spy. And Medic at one point.]

The point is it's still a uniform. I probably oughtta try not to ruin my work shirt even if the color is awful on me.

that icon is cute!

[quickly]

Who cares if ya ruin it?

Yer boss? Who issat, anyway?

I do love it. <3

[hasstandards]

[Pause.]

A bloke named Constable Cooper.

[He is a talking raccoon.]

[quickly]

What a weird name.

I haven't seen this dude around yet. Bet he's real threatening if yer scared'a makin' him mad by bleachin' yer uniform.

[hasstandards]

I'm not scared. He's my boss. There's a difference.

[quickly]

I'm sure some bosses wouldn't care 'bout something as silly as bleachin' uniforms, though.

You can admit it if yer scared, I won't tell anyone. Promise.

[hasstandards]

I'm supposed to be on my best behavior with this one.

And I'm not scared. Stop calling me that.

[quickly]

Chicken!

[Scout's going to flap his arms like a bird and make 'bawk' noises now.]

[hasstandards]

I said knock it off!

[sentryslinger]

You two just can't get along anywhere, can you?

[quickly]

Nope.

Not until he admits I'm better than he is in every way, at least.

[bring_the_beatdown]

Make me.

[sentryslinger]

Come on, fellas. Don't you start this now.

[bring_the_beatdown]

What? We're not doin' nothing!

[Picture of innocence here.]

[sentryslinger]

What did I just get through sayin' about you two not gettin' along?

[bring_the_beatdown]

I dunno. I didn't know there was gonna be a test. I wasn't takin' notes.

[sentryslinger]

I said don't start, and y'all better remember it this time.

[bring_the_beatdown]

Don't tell me! Tell him! He started it!

[quickly]

Maybe I will!

Threadjack please?

[stabstabstab]

/popcorn.gif all the way over here, thanks.

C'mon dad, I can handle it!

[bring_the_beatdown]

I'd like ta see you try, pally!

BLU Scoot can't even handle getting dressed in the morning :P

[quickly]

[Puffs out his chest.]

Fine! But don't go cryin' ta yer Ma when I'm done with ya.

You know what? I'll be nice.

I'll give ya the first move. Go.

COME SAY THAT TO MY FACE.

[bring_the_beatdown]

Pff. Like I even need it. This is just gonna be embarrassing for you.

[Run, double-jump, SWINGING BAT AT YOUR ALMOST IDENTICAL FACE.]

He is so impressed by both your maturities.

[stabstabstab]

[Just...going to be a creep and watch the two of you fight for now. It's not because he wants to see how good his son the BLU Scout is doing. Nor is it because he's secretly rooting for the BLU Scout supporting his fellow team mate. He's just...bored. Yeah.

Popcorn Engie?]

Sigh. Kids.

[sentryslinger]

[Yeah, give him some of that popcorn. Engie's just going to erect a Dispenser over here in the corner for when both boys are inevitably bleeding all over the place and crying for Medics.]

They'll learn. Hopefully.

[stabstabstab]

[Good idea. Spy hands over the popcorn and watches as Engie starts up the dispenser.]

I suppose I should contact my own Labourer as well, for my team's Scout?

[Doesn't sound too happy about it either.]

Nope.avi

[sentryslinger]

No need for that, Spy. I'll just adjust mine to work on both of 'em.

[medick]

[ he'll either be back for corpses ( yay ) or whiners ( sigh!! ) right?? ]

[bring_the_beatdown]

[Yeah see? He's way more awesome because he has a dispenser and parental support! He's totally gonna win.]

[medick]

If you are so bored, I know the perfect, useful time waster for you.

[ GET ON THE OPERATION TABLE ]

[quickly]

Uh, no thanks, Doc.

Yer time wasters are a little weird, alright? I don't want nothin' to do with 'em.

[bring_the_beatdown]

No way you always win! I think your visions all screwy on account of me beatin' yer brains in. But don't worry, maybe I can hit 'em back into place.

And who are you callin' a copy? Look pally, I'm as original as they come. Just cuz you saw me one day and decided to nab my style ain't my fault. It's an improvement over whatever lameass shit you were doing before.

[quickly]

Whoa.

Dude.

I think ya got this all wrong. I didn't copy you, shit -- I would never even think'a that -- you musta copied me somewheres down the line. I mean, I can't blame ya, seein' as I'm real awesome and slick and everythin' but ya obviously messed up somewhere in yer copyin' 'cause yer skills are still lackin'.

Maybe you'd be a real threat if ya picked up some glasses.

[bring_the_beatdown]

Wow. You really must have taking a beating. You should get Medic ta look at that before your brains ooze out your nose or some gross shit like that.

How do you even function? Does your team have to remind you to breathe and make sure you don't run into walls? Where's your tinfoil hat?

[quickly]

[Laughs.]

I got my tinfoil hat right here, pal.

[With that slick line, he flips BLU off.]

[bring_the_beatdown]

Oh har har har. Where'd ya learn how to insult people, kindergarten? I've seen better insults on the back of cereal boxes.