donnie darko + brotping her with the hulk

[neveracoward]

Do you even know where that movie is? What reason other than "the Smurf analysis" would incline you to watch it when you've totally forgotten about it up until now?

I get it. I'm blue. The Hulk is green. It was mildly amusing the first time, but marrying him? Can I trade you in for a newer model before you pick up on something just as moronic and run with it?

Blue and green don't even coordinate all that well, and they don't even make a color worth writing home about.

Quit it.

Comments

[icanreadyourmindyes]

Christ Raven...

[ nope, you don't get tony, you get movieverse charles. 8) ]

[neveracoward]

[UHM EXCUSE YOU]

...Raven?

[No. No. No no no. Never. Never ever.]

[icanreadyourmindyes]

Yes, Raven.

[ blank look man. ]

[neveracoward]

[As if she didn't hate Charles enough for stealing her daughter...]

Ah, okay, yeah. All right. I'm not your sister, I'm not your Raven, and I don't answer to that name. Especially not from the lips of any Charlies Xavier, do you dig my jive?

[icanreadyourmindyes]

[ Yes, he can see you hate him. But he's just going to smile disarmingly and lean against that wall. ]

Many apologies, Mystique. I never found you to be so... [ pause... thinking of the word. the one that won't get him punched because raven hits hard, this one is older and stronger so yes, she will hit harder fsdjkgfasdlfjkasgdf ] ...testy. But I am well aware you're not my Raven.

[neveracoward]

[Testy? Don't be jealous that she has more manly testes than you, Chuck, it's not a good look on you.]

Last I heard, you didn't have her anymore anyway, so drop the possessive pronoun shit before I put you in a chair right here and now.

[smashing_good_time]

...

You're the one that wanted to go to Bakerstreet. [And just so you know? If it wasn't obvious? He's blaming you for this.]

[neveracoward]

[Oh, hush. You got a trophy wife and a puppy out of the deal and she also nearly killing Bruce with a frying pan. Your life is good.]

Not me. Her. Don't compare us ever again.

[smashing_good_time]

[If Bruce dies. He dies too. You know that right?]

...

You're the one that wanted to "hang out." [Still blaming you. Either way this is your fault for trusting muns you know.]

[neveracoward]

[She was trying to make Bruce Hulk out! It was a pandemic!]

You do realize it goes two ways, right?

[smashing_good_time]

Yeah. It's still easier to blame you.

[Because Hulk is a douche like that.]

[neveracoward]

The most charming Avenger, ladies and gentlemen, give him a round of applause.

[white_queen]

Red and blue coordinate quite well together, and there is a Red Hulk running around these days. (Or even a Red She-Hulk, if your tastes run that way.)

Keep in mind that red and blue make purple. A dreadful colour, though why Psylocke insists on drenching herself in it, I'm sure I'll never know.

Regardless, it's certainly worth writing more about than blue-green.

[neveracoward]

[Oh, ew. Gross. Gross.]

I went my entire life without knowing that red and blue made purple, Emma, you have truly enlightened me.

[white_queen]

Sarcasm, Mystique? I'm merely trying to help you find a suitable, color-coordinated match.

[neveracoward]

Aw, are you playing Cupid? Are you trying to insinuate that Psylocke and I would make a beautiful, loving, caring, and perfectly matched couple?

[white_queen]

I actually meant the Red Hulk, since evidently you enjoy them large and prone to smashing things.

I wonder what that says about you.

keywords bb

[neveracoward]

[Emma, why would you ever.]

I'd rather be with someone who's completely honest about their abilities than be with someone who took advantage of me in a professional situation in order to get me to fall back on them when their true love died.

[master_of_magnet]

...You seem upset.

[Deadpan sarcasm the way only Erik can do.]

[mechatronic]

So, not only did I not get an invite, I didn't even know this was a thing--sounds like Bruce is a sly dog when he wants to be and can even keep a lid on it; I knew he had it in him. I'm so proud. [Ignoring the whole other universe and different relationship set-up thing, of course. Shh, no-one tell Tony about what happens in 616-land...]

And I don't even know where you're registered. It's a tragedy.

[neveracoward]

[If it isn't her favorite person in the entire world! Her absolute favorite human being! (Spoiler: it actually isn't)]

No, honey, no. Not Bruce. Hulk. Doctor Banner isn't at all my kind of guy, and the Hulk would undoubtedly be smash-ready at being compared to him. [Though, she does offer a shrug.] I'd really rather not deal with Bruce if I don't have to, which is why we make such a great team.

[mechatronic]

[Oh, he's so many people's least favourite human being :')

And you know, he's Tony Stark, nothing should surprise him anymore. But in spite of himself he raises an eyebrow and involuntarily, but not subtly, gives her a brief up and down glance before raising an eyebrow.

He pause, taking a breath in to speak then shuts his mouth again and shakes his head, hands raised.]

I got nothing. And by nothing I actually mean everything but shouldn't touch it.

... No, it's gotta happen: how does that even work? I mean, he's--[vague hand-gestures to clearly signal huge]--and you're--[And an arm outstretched in her direction to clearly say not huge]--y'know.

[neveracoward]

[One of those perfect eyebrows arches as though he's just said something so incredibly stupid she can't be arsed to even tell him just how stupid it is.]

Are you asking how it would be possible for me and the Hulk to have sex, Mister Stark? [It's actually a sexless marriage, but Mystique does love talking about her mutation. She's also older than dirt, so there's very little that surprises or bothers her, especially nothing in relation to sex.] You would like me to tell you those nonexistent details? Because it's very, very simple—and it would be simple, if he ever felt up to it.

[mechatronic]

[He's not always the smartest of geniuses, I'll give you that...

He holds his hands up and shakes his head, sort of apologetically if he wasn't, well, him.]

Nope. I'm good. Some things are best left to the non-imagination and the question itself was just a slip of the tongue that I absolutely saw coming a mile away.. That'll happen from time to time, anyone will tell you.

Fashionably late

[knowsbetter]

What words of infinite wisdom.

[That's sarcasm, by the way, just in case you didn't pick that up.]