couldn't resist. update talk.

[syncopator]

old mcdonald had a farm
e i e i o
and he bought that farm with two demon doggy swords to the gut
e i e i o

i mean lets be honest
as much as i bitched about wanting to avoid this exact thing
it was probably always going to happen
and isnt this how it works in every shitty movie about some heroic dude
his wife or his buddy or his dog dies or something
and thats what inspires him to go out and murder everyone
or in our case save a bunch of universes or something
we all know whose job that is
it was never going to be mine
im the sidekick
here for laughs and to tug at your heartstrings with his sad and noble sacrifice
who gets double stabbed by some dogs with wings and dies on top of his best friends corpse

man
this is pretty bullshit actually
but to be meta for a second here
will this even stick??
who the fuck knows anymore
shit got too real for me to handle
strider out

Comments

[syncopator]

you offering
cant say ive got an infinite supply of cowbell on hand

[anachronologistics]

sure ill just call up the cowbell depot and clean them out of their entire stock
then well make some magic happen
cowbells will become the new uggs
well be more famous than we already are
and peta will finally shut the hell up about the inhumanity of our fashion statements
children will sleep a little better at night
maybe there will be some sick parties
and when this bullshit doesnt stick youll be ready to get back in there and get some shit done

[syncopator]

glory fuckin hallelujah to the holiest cow bell on high
may it ringaling forever amen
you really think this shit wont stick dude

[anachronologistics]

dude itll be like be like similar poles on a magnet
repelling that shit like the universes best bug repellent
that shit is simultaneously filing for divorce and custody of the kids and family st bernard
peep peep shouldve signed a prenup asshole

[syncopator]

why is everyone so optimistic about this
everyone and their ancient double prototyped granny is convinced that everyone who just died wont stay dead
and well all get a miraculous reset and live happily ever after
like when did we all decide to start having shared communal delusions that hussie is into that sort of thing

[anachronologistics]

well its not like the douchebag hasnt already exhibited symptoms of chronic case of deus ex machina-itis or anything

[syncopator]

ok
point
but arent those deus ex machinas usually murder machines
deus ex murderas
man
all this optimism is starting to make me think im some kind of cynic
which we all know is patently fucking false i am a fountain of everlasting hope