Of course I'm taking her to mylittlejamjar - was there ever any doubt? (Lunaverse AU)

[meltsicecastles]

I demand an explanation for the username you have given me, Mundane.

I am Dame Trixie Lulamoon, the living embodiment of the principle that Friendship is Magic and Knight of Princess Luna's Night Court. A Night Court that, through my quick thinking, a tiny bit of help from my friends, and yards upon yards of rope given to Equestria's enemies, I have exposed for the morass of corruption that it is. Well, was before I reminded Luna that doing her job isn't diving into the sun with power, anyway.

I saved Ponyville from an Ursa Minor, Twilight being Twilight, the Curse of Saturnalia, parasprites, the Apple Trust being tres stupide during a famine, the Night Court being the Night Court, and - oh yes - CORONA. TWICE. My legerdemain, illusions, slight of hand and showmareship are second to none. I taught Dinky Doo magic and my teachings with some small help from Twilight are responsible for at least two young ones getting their Cutie Marks.

BUT YOU MELT ONE ICE CASTLE...

Comments

[cape_and_wizard_hat]

[Worried about Ponyville? Oh boy, where does Trixie even start?]

...Surprisingly, yes. Ponyville still stands, something short of a complete miracle, given the insane and crazy denizens that make their home there. Trixie knows not why she continues to make repeat returns to such insanity.

[meltsicecastles]

Oh, compared to Corona and Grogar I wouldn't call them that fou. Even my Twilight turned out to be a decent person, once she realized what she had done. Besides, I'm sure you have true friends there.

...Erm. Well, knowing what I was like, I HOPE you have true friends there.

How are Derpy and Dinky, by the way? And Lyra?

[cape_and_wizard_hat]

[Hey, remember when you found out that Twilight was just information in, application out?]

The Great and Powerful hath no need for friends, for she has survived for year upon year on her own, never failing, never faltering even for a single second!

[Yeah. This Trixie's similar. Kinda.]

Trixie does not recognize the former two names, but... Lyra...

[She winces a little.]

Just... just try and stay away from any strange liquids she offers to you.

[meltsicecastles]

[Facepalmhoof! Apply directly to the forehead.]

Funny. Back home, I'm the oenephile and bourbon afficionado, not her. She haunts Berry Punch's place?

Derpy Hooves is Kindness, mon... ah, me. [she'll get her coat and wizard hat.] Dinky Doo is her daughter. You've never heard of either? How different is Celestia's principality from Luna's?

And... whether or not you need them, the element of magic is that which is at your side. I would not be so quick to discount the aid of friends. I'm glad I have mine.

[cape_and_wizard_hat]

No, not alcohol. "Squink". "The Works". Sometimes Trixie wonders if such a unicorn is as strange as the supposed Overlord Zetta. The mare that stands before you does her best to try not to interact with them too often. She values her sanity too much to allow such a tragedy. And let us just not speak of The Pale Pony, currently.

The Kingdom of Equestria is but a Diarchy, lead by both The Princesses of the Day and Night! Trixie is unfamiliar with your world, outsider, but...! It may exist akin to structure of either Griffaltar! She knows not if the moon holds any type of government. Alas, she had only performed there of little time.

[Trixie huffs.]

You of all ponies should not be so weak as to have to rely on the aid of others! For you- wait, you hold The Element of Magic?

[meltsicecastles]

I was as surprised as you, at the time.

You know, I've always heard my taste in food called odd. Neigh Orleans and all that jazz. So now I really will have to talk to your Lyra... with that in mind.

She isn't Loyalty itself either, is she. [This is in a flat voice. It's also very clearly not meant as an insult but about the Element] Okay, please do me a favor and tell me of your element bearers. I'm sure you're as dazzling a showmare as I am, so revel in it!

[cape_and_wizard_hat]

[...Oh Celestia, not another Lyra.]

Neigh Orleans? Trixie wishes to adorn you with respect over that name and wil take drastic steps to never perform in such a town if she ever reaches the confines of your world. Tell Trixie at least Los Pegasus is sane.

[Well... Since Trixie asked, Trixie launches into the story of how Nightmare Moon was defeated. It lasts quite a while, and it's clear that this Trixie is accustomed to storytelling. She takes some liberties, especially with the identities of the Element Bearers, in order to make the story flow and sound better. A few of those liberties are also taken in order to show off a few simple magic tricks, both spells and sleight-of-hoof. When she finishes, she takes a bow and awaits applause.]

[meltsicecastles]

Wait, wait, wait. Hold on. APPLEJACK, the Element of Honesty? Miss "The Apple Trust will go bankrupt tomorrow if I don't throw around my weight" Applejack?

Rainbow Dash, RAINBOW DASH, the Element of Shirking of all ponies as Loyalty?

I can sort of see Fluttershy as Kindness and Pinkie as Laughter, and I've met a Twilight who bore Magic so that's not too surprising but -

Okay. You've got to be putting me on.

[cape_and_wizard_hat]

[...Okay. Different Trixie, different world. That's to be expected. Still, she would've wished for a Trixie coming from a more similar world.]

'Tis different and odd to an outsider such as yourself, yes, but tell Trixie:

[She dispels the illusion on her royal blue cape. And now, instead of just a simple sapphire clasp, there's a collar with a spherical sapphire in it. She points to it.]

Is this The Element of Magic you so hold dear to you? Nay! It is an Evoker, filled with the power of a Persona! Trixie holds no Element, alas, but many an other skill and possession are to make up for such a cauterizing shortcoming!

[meltsicecastles]

I have literally no idea what that is or what that does - and tell me it's not a dark magic artifact.

[cape_and_wizard_hat]

Fear no more, for it holds no corruptive influence within itself! Behold, the greatest equine to grace the lands of Equestriua shall give you but a tiny demonstration!

[She holds her hoof up to it.]

Andras!

[It glows for a second, and then a strange owl thing allears beside Trixie.]

A one and only Persona! Meet Andras, of Moon Arcana.

[meltsicecastles]

...I don't even know where to begin. That looks like the sort of artifact a zebra would make. It's worth studying.

Wait. The Moon Arcana?

[cape_and_wizard_hat]

The Great and Powerful Trixie deems that of no need. Minato and a few others possess such an artifact, and she ha seen witness to many others wielding Personae!

[Though that was during the fog, but still.]

Indeed, you hath heard correctly! It is simply fitting, that Personae are connected to the Arcana mostly found in Tarot Cards, is it not?

[meltsicecastles]

It would not have occured to me to tie summoning to cartomancy, no. Of course, I imagine that La Soleil means something VERY different to you...

[cape_and_wizard_hat]

Unfortunately, no recognition is gained from such a phrase, or place, or thing, whatever it may be.

[meltsicecastles]

The Sun. It is not a happy symbol where I am from.

[cape_and_wizard_hat]

Ah. Such a strange concoction of the mind to believe the sun harmful. Though, many a pony were frightful of the Night! Trixie, however, has always enjoyed gazing at Princess Luna's sea of mystical stars. She dubs most of them with their own names.