Because romance is dead.

[deadliestviper]

Sweetie. Let me make this perfectly clear, since you seem to have trouble grasping it.

The past is the past, and it ain't never happenin' again. Do you think I got this far by being stupid? Now I know Bill was one thing, you do too. But if I worked with O-Ren, Vernita, and Elle so long without anything besides well-deserved respect and hate developing, why would lust enter into it after they left me for dead? Why the fuck would I want to fuck anyone after the whole coma thing?

"Hate sex"? Please, bitch. My fucking and fighting days have gone the way of the Deadly Viper squad, I don't care who you're offering. Drop this bullshit; all I want to do is live what's left of my life in peace. So here's an idea: save your shipping and your lesbian fantasies for some other girl and let me find my daughter.

Comments

[butisitzen]

[He says it slowly, mulling it over.]

"Live... what's left of my life... in peace." I like that.

[deadliestviper]

Easier said than done, huh?

[butisitzen]

Maybe. [Maybe more than he wants to admit]

Then again, the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.

[deadliestviper]

The problem is once you get started, how do you change course?

[butisitzen]

[He shrugs]

How about taking a step in another direction?

[deadliestviper]

Touché.

[butisitzen]

[Uh-oh, he's losing her. He takes the opportunity to pull a pluot out of his pocket, shining it on his lapels.]

Want one? I grew it myself. It's a pluot. Plum-apricot hybrid.

[deadliestviper]

[Only lost in thought, Charlie, don't worry. She looks down at the pluot and smiles.]

That's sweet of you, thanks. Daoist and a gardener?

[butisitzen]

I try not to limit myself.

[He takes out another pluot, takes a huge bite, and keeps on talking]

My attorney thinks I'm making up for lost time.

[deadliestviper]

Your attorney, huh? How long were you in prison?

[butisitzen]

[Mild surprise, since most people don't catch on that fast. Though maybe she's been in a prison of her own. He can usually sniff out someone who's done time.]

Twelve years.

What's a 'Deadly Viper Squad'?

[deadliestviper]

[Hey, mention an attorney and making up lost time, and it falls into place.]

Sorry to hear.

Old garage band I was in, way back when.

[butisitzen]

It could have been longer.

Wow, that must have been some music. What was your 'weapon of choice'?

[deadliestviper]

What were you in for?

Oh, I could shred... on guitar. Haven't played in ages though.

[butisitzen]

Murder one.

You ever thought about picking up the axe again?

[deadliestviper]

Mm. Did you do it?

Every once in a while, I miss it. Hard to do when you've got a teenager, though.

[butisitzen]

You know, most people don't bother asking that. But no. I didn't.

Are you afraid it'll rub off on her?

[deadliestviper]

I didn't think so. In my experience, people who've killed are quick to boast about it. But I'm sorry you had to go through that.

[chuckles] My daughter is Mommy's girl. Knowing my kid, if she wanted to learn she'd learn quick and do her damnedest to best me. No, I just don't want it to split my attention.

[butisitzen]

Hard times build determination and inner strength. Through them we can also come to appreciate the uselessness of anger.

Do you know a lot of killers?

[deadliestviper]

Well said. I like the way you think.

Not anymore. Back in my rock days I ran with a rough crowd.

[butisitzen]

Thank you. The Dalai Lama said that, but it's an inner truth we all possess. I can give you some books if you're interested.

I know a lot of killers. Some of them aren't as rough as you'd think.

Sorry this is so late...

[deadliestviper]

I think I'd like that.

Yeah? Guess they don't all hang out in biker bars hustling pool then.

pfft it's okay, I'm the latest of lateville

[butisitzen]

They have them on tape, too. Hands-free. Just in case you want to listen to them in your car. Sometimes you can't beat a comforting voice to drown out your own thoughts.

Do you think that's why so many people hang out in bars? I mean, they're so noisy and crowded. Maybe they're trying to drown their thoughts out too.