Voicetesting | Simon Says...

[jailbirdprosecutor]

... I refuse.

There are matters of far greater precedence that require my attention. I will not have you squander my time with such petty games. Furthermore, it has already become abundantly clear that your own schedule will not allow for tomfoolery either.

It is best to leave chained dogs lie.

[Mun wonders if perhaps Simon means "tethered birds", which instantly causes his face to turn from default frustration to Menacing Death Glare^(tm). He reaches down by his side as if he's about to draw a sword.]

SILENCE! Cease your outrageous jabbering! If I hear another quip about birds out of you, I will strike you down with my blade!

[Aww, don't be like that, Simon. It may be hard to swallow, but mun has a whole flock of bird jokes ready to take flight and each one is a hoot.]

......Tch.

Comments

[snakearm]

Better things t'get in a flap about than a pun, Deville

[jailbirdprosecutor]

[Auuugh that one was terrible.]

Believe me when I claim that these horrid puns are the most petty of my mundane's offenses.

[snakearm]

[Intentionally terrible. You're welcome Simon.]

Why? What's worse than bird puns?

[truthsnomiracle]

Should you find a way to commit murder across the fourth wall, I expect such knowledge to be used only to the end of seeing that anyone else who discovers the secret is found guilty of any crime they might commit with it.

[jailbirdprosecutor]

Chief Prosecutor! [-errr. Younger Chief Prosecutor? He's not sure how that's possible. One thing's for sure, he needs to show proper respect. He straightens his spine to stand up straight and bows his head.]

I apologize if my animosity was out of line. I simply meant to impart a due warning upon my mundane.

[sketchingideals]

That's not really how it works here. Besides, you shouldn't hurt someone over a few jokes anyway! But I guess I do have to admit that they're, ah...

[Really bad ones. And when even Jeb knows it...]

[jailbirdprosecutor]

... Bah. Perhaps she isn't worthy to feel the sting of my katana regardless.

[Which translates to the notion that Simon's just a big softy and he wouldn't lift a finger against his mundane even if the fourth wall weren't in his way.]

[roboticists]

Did being in jail drain the irony from you? Considering that your mun has gifted you with a username that is wholly accurate yet cringe worthy and admirable at the same time.

eeeee hi

[jailbirdprosecutor]

[Oh Aura, if only you knew. There was a split moment where his mun offered the suggestion of Hawkwardjailbirdpeepsecutor. Thank the lords that be that she toned it down somewhat.]

Aura. If you are claiming that I should give credit where credit is due, I must disappoint. This 'joke' has existed for quite some time already.

[yuureiressha]

I think they're quite clever!

Don't you enjoy a turn of phrase, sir?

[jailbirdprosecutor]

Only when it is done in good taste. [And he's the one turning the phrases. Considering he takes his own brand of grim humor to the courtroom quite a few times, he's being more than a little hypocritical about this.]

[1/4; I couldn't resist, sorry!]

[pinokosthewife]

DOC, you're back~~! ♥

[Sorry, with that skunk hair and drab attire of yours, she's mistaken you for the famous Dr. Black Jack.]

[2/4]

[pinokosthewife]

It was sho cruel of you to weave your poor wife all alone all thish time! Now, where were you, who were you with, for how long— was it a woman who kept you away all thish time? I shwear, if you cheat on Pinoko, I'll know!

'Cause Pinoko's the wife and she knows these things!

[3/4]

[pinokosthewife]

[Wait.]

[4/4]

[pinokosthewife]

HMPH! What a mishguiding appeawanche.

All thish time and it's jusht shome imposhter.

[cykedfists]

So your mun has finally decided to bother you?

[jailbirdprosecutor]

"Bother" is, perhaps, a bit of an understatement. She is proving to be quite the nuisance. It feels rather like a cruel joke of fate, as I find myself moved from one prison into the next.

[fixespeople]

You.... You look familiar....

[Come on Athena... He hasn't changed his outfit at all...]

1/2

[jailbirdprosecutor]

[!!!]

You... How can this-

2/2

[jailbirdprosecutor]

[He draws a deep breath through his nose to steady himself, then tries again. It's been too long since he last spoke to her like this and he's quite sure he can't go back to the simpleminded soul he used to be, but he can try.]

...Good day, Athena.

[disarmingsmile]

Are you skilled with blades?

[Babyshelly has PRIORITIES.]

[jailbirdprosecutor]

[...] I have devoted quite a few years to honing such skills, yes. However, I fail to see why such a thing is relevant.

[A better topic of discussion than bird jokes, sure, but an odd one nonetheless.]

[thefaceofjustice]

It doesn't sound like you have a choice, Prosecutor Blackquill. So you might as well go along quietly and be on your best behavior!

1/2

[jailbirdprosecutor]

[Simon becomes aware of Fulbright's presence before the man even speaks up, because... What is this ominous feeling of foreboding that threatens to engulf him?!]

2/2

[jailbirdprosecutor]

[Oh, he is not amused.]

Fool Bright. [The name leaves him in a rather stiff tone of voice.] It seems I am still unable to wander too far without being followed by my own personal mutt. A miserable fate indeed. Regardless, I am affronted you would assume I am not on my best behavior already.