malignantrage: (bitching)
Karkat Vantas ([personal profile] malignantrage) wrote in [community profile] dear_mun2013-09-16 12:58 pm

Karkat made a new friend

OH MY GOD!
I SWEAR EACH SUCCESSIVE MUSE THAT ENTERS YOUR HEAD IS A BIGGER ASSHOLE THAN THE LAST.
I DIDN'T THINK IT WAS POSSIBLE FOR ANYONE TO BE MORE OF A DOUCHEBAG THAN DAVE
BUT SOMEHOW STRIDER NUMBER TWO PULLS IT OFF.
DIRK ACTS LIKE HE'S THE HOTTEST SHIT EVEN THOUGH HE LITERALLY BLOWS CHUNKS ALL THE WAY OUT THE PROTEIN CHUTE.
WHO DOES HE THINK HE IS TO TELL ME WHO I CAN AND CAN'T HAVE A CRUSH ON?
I AM THE EXPERT ON ROMANCE.
ME, NOT HIM.
AND THE LAST THING I NEED IS SOME INSUFFERABLE PRICK TELLING ME WHO I CAN'T DATE.
SERIOUSLY, GET THIS SMUG, NOOK SNIFFING BASTARD OUT OF HERE.
DIRK IS SUCH A DICK.
HE IS SUCH A DICK THAT DICK IS GOING TO BE HIS NAME FROM NOW ON.
WHENEVER I SAY THE WORD DICK IN THE FUTURE PLEASE ASSUME I'M TALKING ABOUT DIRK.
ALSO, DICK IS COMPLETELY DISRESPECTFUL OF MY PERSONAL SPACE.
I GUESS IT RUNS IN THE STRIDER FAMILY.
IF HE FLICKS MY HORNS WITH HIS FINGERS ONE MORE TIME I AM GOING TO SHIT SO MUCH RAGE SNAKE THAT THIS ENTIRE THINK PAN WILL BE FULL OF IT.
NOT THAT IT ALREADY ISN'T, BECAUSE WE BOTH KNOW YOU'RE FULL OF SHIT.

[personal profile] smuppetwrangler 2013-09-29 05:58 am (UTC)(link)
My lips are hereby zipped
Your palespades complexity is safe with me