Voice testing...and he's not thrilled...

[alwayspenetrated]

Bitch, wait just one fucking minute!

"Always penetrated"? Are you fucking kidding me? What is that bullshit!? I'm fuck-mothering Dante! Do you understand what that means? It means I do the penetrating!! And I'll have you know that I do that penetrating A LOT!!

Now, if you wanna' air my dirty laundry for all to see, go right ahead. I don't really give a shit.

But do it right God dammit!!

[He pauses to cross his arms before his broad chest, grumbling to himself.]

Jesus...you get stabbed a few times and people can't let it the fuck go...

Comments

[alwayspenetrated]

...there is nothing more important in this world than women, pizza and strawberry sundaes thank you very much!

And I do not take orders from women!!

[Yes you do. Trish may be a bit more submissive but Lady's got you wrapped so tight around her finger it's not even funny.]

[daemon_militis]

[Vergil just gives Dante a long stare before pulling out the coup de grace.]

You let a child redecorate your 'office.'

[alwayspenetrated]

Okay you can just go fuck yourself - just because I'm not as stiff and inflexible as you doesn't make me weak!

Fucker you don't even have an office!!

[...because that's just what Vergil wants, I'm sure...a dirty, stinky office with a strip club down the block...]

[daemon_militis]

Yes, and I'm sure putting the frilly sun-bonnets on the demonic skulls mounted on your walls was your idea.

...Why would I need one? If you recall, I did not make a profession out of bloodshed. [Just a hobby.]

[...Also, Vergil has gotten more tail than you. Or at least has PROOF he got some. He very highly doubts either Trish or Lady has done anything other than put him on a leash.]

[alwayspenetrated]

It was not but don't be jealous because inanimate objects got to wear them and you didn't.

[Dante leans up close to Vergil with an expression on his face that is daaaaaangerously close to being troll-face.]

Does wittle baby Vergil wanna' wear da' bonnet?

[...Dante please start running before he actually kills you...]

[daemon_militis]

I wouldn't be one to talk, if I were you, Dante.

[Vergil remains stoic, though is concocting his own troll response.]

Though Trish did mention that the bonnet the girl picked out for you did match your eyes nicely.

[Pulling out his book again.]

[alwayspenetrated]

Well we both know Trish is a fucking liar, now don't we?

[And he means that in the most caring way possible.]

It's rude to read when people are talking to you, y'know. It's called fucking etiquette.

[daemon_militis]

[Opening the book up.]

If there was a person capable of intelligent conversation here, that would indeed apply.

[alwayspenetrated]

I have very intelligent conversations, fuck you very much!

Go ahead! Ask me a question! Any question, I dare you!

[daemon_militis]

[That gets a look up from his book.]

Fine. What play does this quote come from?

To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day,
To the last syllable of recorded time;
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player,
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage,
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.

[alwayspenetrated]

Mac-Fuckin-Beth! HaHA! Suck it, bitch!

[...not technically wrong but not right either, Dante.]

[It's a play about the supernatural, of course Dante knows about it!]

[daemon_militis]

I will admit to being surprised. I didn't think you had any more of an attention span than the common squirrel. To think you could sit through a play of that caliber is rather... odd.

[No, he's not pouting that he didn't get to stump you. Nope. Not a bit.]

[alwayspenetrated]

Well fuck you very much too! I'm not as stupid as you thought I was!

[You tripped into that one, Dante - admit it!]

[And he didn't really sit through it so much as he nodded off between scenes. He's had some...interesting dates.]