Muse does not appreciate how I play the Deadpool game | Dan Vs.

[angry_jerk]

No no NO! You're playing all wrong! You need to upgrade the points you can get for each kill first! Then you'll be able to afford stronger attacks!

Oh my god... Did you learn how to play shooters from your grandmother?! You've hit a grand total of nothing in this game! Have you even played a shooter before?! No, LA Noire does not count!

... Just... Give me the controller. Before you givr me an aneurism with your unbelievable stupidity.

[...]

You're giving me crap about being a voice in your head... WHILE PLAYING A DEADPOOL GAME?!

Oh wait, don't do that, don't- WHAT DID I TELL YOU?! GAME OVER! AGAIN! WHY WOULD YOU RUN IN THE MIDDLE OF A FIREFIGHT, YOU IMBECILE?!?!

Comments

[hangthedj]

Oooo, somebody's gettin' mad about video games!

[Don't ask how she knows what those are.]

[angry_jerk]

I wouldn't be so pissed if this ignoramous played the damn thing with even a smidgen of his brain cells!

[hangthedj]

Man, if you're gonna get all fussy about games I think the problem's on your end.

Just simmer down a little, is all I'm sayin'.

[angry_jerk]

My problem? It's not my fault this neanderthal can't hit the broadside of a virtual barn!

It's not about the stupid game, it's about the principle of the thing. He sucks and should let me play instead!

[hangthedj]

And how're you gonna manage that? You're just a voice in his head, it's not like you can just take control of his hands and play the game for him.

Actually, no that sounds super rad. Give it a try.

[angry_jerk]

That is both a phenomenal and awesome idea. I'm gonna go for it!

[He stares off into... wherever the brain is in this place. He glares angrily at whatever he's looking at, which is nothing new. He starts grunting and straining his neck and arms.

Finally, he collapses.]

[hangthedj]

[Just the biggest shit-eating grin possible, over here.]

So, uh...

How'd that work out for ya?

[angry_jerk]

[Slowly peeling himself off the ground, he glares at Vinyl.]

Shut your stupid horsey-mouth.

I don't even really care. Last thing I want to be is a pretentious French subconscious.

Sorry for the lack of actual icons. Image hunting for pony stuff is a nightmare

[hangthedj]

That look says otherwise.

Maybe you just didn't try hard enough.

No problem. I can only IMAGINE how tough it is to find good icons for background ponies.

[angry_jerk]

Maybe you're a stupid-face. Ever think of that?

It's like jamming my hand into a pile of medical waste looking for an unopened box of bandaids

[hangthedj]

I think, if you look real deep inside yourself, you'll find that it is in fact you who is the stupid-face here.

That does not sound like fun times.

[angry_jerk]

No, it's I'm whom is the stupid-face here.

[Pause.]

And shut up!

[hangthedj]

No dude, it's totally you who has the stupid face.

I swear, I could draw your head with a straight edge.

[angry_jerk]

Shut up! My face is awesome! You're just jealous.

[hangthedj]

Oh yeah, I'm totally jealous and intimidated by you and your soulpatch.

[Can you feel the sarcasm?]

What, d'you just glue some toothbrush bristles your chin and call it a day?

[angry_jerk]

Hey! Don't knock the soul patch. People dig the soul patch. I dig the soul patch.

And it grows naturally, thank you very much.

[hangthedj]

Yeah, y'know who digs the soul patch? Other people with soul patches.

And I'm glad you took the time to separate yourself from the category of 'people'. You're making this way too easy, dude.

[Vinyl, no, stop taunting the violent sociopath.]

[angry_jerk]

[But he does make it easy. Even if it's a terrible idea.]

I've never met anyone else I liked with a soul patch.

And why shouldn't I seperate myself? People are stupid. I'm awesome!