welp, voice-test!

[halfdressed]

You've got great taste, sweetpea, but let's be realistic here for a sec. Where doesn't need my extra special touch? Everyone could benefit from a little love to spice up their frankly boring lives, this isn't going to be an easy decision. I can tell you're stressed, Cupid gets the same ugly lines when he pulls that face. Honey, no, c'mon! Smile.

You've got the Goddess of Love on your side no matter what happens, what could possibly go wrong? Okay, shush, that was totally rhetorical. 

Comments

[fotlenke]

You might turn a young child into lusting after their parent?

[ Freya's daughter is hating her mun right now. ]

[halfdressed]

[ ffff talk about making Ditey wince in record time. ]

Ew, gross! Rhetorical! I said rhetorical.

[fotlenke]

You could turn so green over your beauty that you damn any woman who is called more lovely than yourself.

[ Have the Norse and the Greek EVER gotten along? ]

[halfdressed]

[ Hey, Thor and Loki are hotties. FREE PASSES. ]

Yeah, except me and Psyche get along. Nice try, though! Who are you — Discord's newest and skankiest little disciple?

[fotlenke]

[ Lay off the boys, Ditey. Loki...well who cares about Loki, but Thor goes to Jane. ]

Keep speaking words. A little more and I shall have reason to report to Freya.

[halfdressed]

[ Just let her get these manicured hands on Mjolnir ... ]

Oh, no! Freya. [ Cringing, she straightens and abruptly wipes the mock-fear. ] Whatever. Go about your sad little life and stop advertising it to me already, missy.

[fotlenke]

[ Yeaaaah like that will go well. ]

I am no "missy". And you are no Warrior of Love.

[ It goes, Aphrodite, Sirens... ]

[halfdressed]

I'm the Goddess of Love! Who wants to fight and make war when, hm ... well, you know how it goes. Look, you want a warrior? Ares is a teensy, tiny bit out of your league.

Like, a pantheon and a good attitude away.

[fotlenke]

In what realm? [ Excuse her because she might need to throw up. ] Disgusting. Like most your pantheon.

[halfdressed]

Ugh, what is your damage! Did the person who usually shaves your back not check in this morning? Lighten up.

[fotlenke]

I would say same for your toes but the hair between each says different! It I difficult to lighten up when Mother's profession is bombarded by a cheat and a lie in regards to love.

[halfdressed]

Ugly and rude, there's just no hope for you. Exsqueeze me, what was that little angry mutter about 'a cheat and a lie'? Because I deal with hearts, I don't pitch in for the whole mind-reading gig.

[fotlenke]

For true? I have seen prettier faces on horses. [ zing! ] Why must you show your face? You are provoking the unwanted appearance of Zeus or Hermes or -- the worst of your pantheon!

[halfdressed]

Then you're checking out the wrong species.

Legit, honey, what are you babbling about? I don't even know you and you're ripping into my family. What sort of nasty rash are you?

[fotlenke]

You are the nasty rash! You have committed countless atrocities and don't even hold remorse.

[ When she finds out that you're not the Ditey of her world, don't worry, she'll eat crow. ]

How could you twist and abuse love for the sake of your own vanity?

[halfdressed]

Hey! Twist and abuse it? Alright, now you're making me angry. [ Getting all kinds of Discord!vibes off this one. ] Who are you? Last chance before I feel like living up to this new rep you're styling and make you fall in love with a toad.

[fotlenke]

Try and face punishment for laying a hand upon Freya's daughter, bubble-headed twit!

[ You want a fight, Ditey? Let's light up the magic goddess wooshy power and get a rumblin'. And we'll sell sets for $12 a pop. ]

[halfdressed]

[ Ahw hell no, don't make her do this. ]

Freya's daughter — that's you, right? It's still not an answer!

[fotlenke]

Why should it not. Freya is the only Goddess of Love who matters.

[ She magically yanks mud from a nearby puddle and magically shapes into a ball. She hefts it. ] Stop picking your scabs and do something.

[halfdressed]

Girly! I don't know who you are.

[ Hand on a hip, she eyes that mud. ]

Freya's some Norse chick as far as I know, you don't even register. So, what's your name? Last chance, since you seem determined to be an obtuse little bitch.

[fotlenke]

My name is Sigyn.

[ And mud is thrown! ]

[halfdressed]

[ BAM, have a shield of pink glittery hearts. BADASS. ]

Who?