thinking of maybe shipping off to teleios

[soloed]

Since when did I become the top contender for this? Weren't you looking at wolf-lady just like a week ago? What about the guy with all the scars and the chip on his shoulder that would punch vampires repeatedly in the face or something? Why the sudden interest in me again?

I know, I'm nosy and speak my mind too much so hijinks could ensue, I get that. But you've put way more work into the others than me. Are you sure you really wanna consider going down this path? I mean, it took you nearly a whole day just to settle on my damn name. Fleshing out my whole story from the vague details you got's gonna take forever

I don't care if you would have the whole month to work it out, it just won't get done and we both know it.

Comments

[soloed]

I think that's the only thing keeping her from writing it out. This one sometimes has a little foresight even if time management probably leaves a lot to be desired sometimes.

[kalicatastrophe]

Jealous.

I have a built in psuedo-brother that she is trying to keep me from. And there are people there that are crazier than me.

So, what is your dealio that she hasn't written out yet?

[soloed]

My little brother's some kind of chosen one Messiah for my people because hey post-Apocalypse kinda sucks. And I guess he's supposed to hug it out or something because we've got a pretty strict rule against acting in anything less than self-defense when it comes to violence.

But the real humdinger is that I killed someone to keep my little brother safe.

I'm gonna let you guess on the reaction to that.

[kalicatastrophe]

Well that's stupid.

I mean the no violence except in self-defense thing. I mean, were you supposed to let him die? Isn't that being an accomplice? What if someone was trying to commit suicide and instead of punching them in the face 'cause violence is negative on the copacetic you just let them jump. That's like assisted suicide.

It was self-defense, it just wasn't yourself.

[soloed]

That's how I put it, but nope too late. Sullied and all that good stuff.

Best part? She can't decide if that'd mean having my powers bound or getting me kicked out and forced to survive on my own. Or both.

[kalicatastrophe]

Wow.

At least mine just made me a sociopath.

[At least.]

[soloed]

Well, you're not bad for a sociopath.

Not that I've met many. Or how that reflects on me in general now that I think about it...

[kalicatastrophe]

I'm a closet sociopath. It only shows up when I'm killing people. Or if you talk to me long enough. Or if my non-biological siblings are in danger. But I was genetically engineered to be adorable so people instinctively like me.

[Like pie!]

You might have met some. It's a broad category.

[soloed]

So basically you're a killer hamster. Good to know.

Are all your siblings like that?

[kalicatastrophe]

I prefer koala.

No, they have social skills.

[soloed]

Koala? They poop in their sleep. Why would you want to be a koala?

That's good. I mean, non-biological or not, I'd be a little worried if everyone was ready to start stabbing people in the throat all the time in your family.

[kalicatastrophe]

They're unassuming and adorable, and then they rip faces off with their tiny, chubby little paws. Hamsters get vacuumed and college guys so inappropriate things with them, I wouldn't want to be a hamster.

I don't stab people, that so messy. There are other ways to kill people without getting blood all over your shoes.

[soloed]

Wow, okay, point definitely made.

[Images definitely not needed.]

Kill from a distance then or poison? Strangulation seems like it'd still get your shoes scuffed.

[kalicatastrophe]

[VICTORY.]

Well, strangulation depends if they're laying down or not. If they're standing up there's going to be a struggle, but if they're already on the ground you can just tuck your toes on top of their legs.

But usually I just go for distance. Or if I have to: neck snapping, but they take so long to die from that, it's annoying and you usually have to do something else horrendously violent to their brain stem.

[soloed]

I feel like I should be taking notes.

[And staying on your good side.]

[kalicatastrophe]

I could give you lessons.

[soloed]

Do you usually do that?

[kalicatastrophe]

Sometimes while I'm actually doing the assassinating, I give them a step by step run through of what's going to happen so they have the facts straight. But no, I guess not usually. My job blew up last year though, so I'm looking for something new.

Unless you're still a pacifist.

[soloed]

[She worries her lower lip in silence before shrugging.]

Little late for that now, isn't it?

[kalicatastrophe]

No. One instance of violence in defense of a loved one doesn't make you violent, it means your priorities are right. Pacifism should only go so far.

[soloed]

Guess you'd be the expert on it, huh?

[kalicatastrophe]

Yes.

Wait, was that sarcasm?

[soloed]

What? No.

I'm really fluent in smartass, but I can speak English.

[kalicatastrophe]

Oh. Okay, well then I stand by my expertise in murder.

Unless you're Gandhi and have, like, a total thing for salt, I'm pretty sure you can still be a pacifist even if you have been violent before. There are born-again virgins, why can't you be a born again pacifist?

If you wanted, I guess.

[soloed]

I guess I never really put much thought into it. I never really had a choice about it before. Or after.