He's making me look at other games. Or trying to, anyway.

[gunslingerguy]

Any game I go to has to allow me to have my gun, pure and simple. I've lost everything else I ever had, you ain't takin' this from me without a fight. I don't care what you were looking at previously, I am sick and tired of going through all this and never even glimpsing a light at the end of the tunnel. How much torture are you willing to put me through? 'Cause I am not a hero, lady. I will break on you. Remember canon? Remember the part where I got smashed? That is just a hint of who I really am. You want unstoppable will power you go for some other muse hanging around this headspace. I am human. I have limits. And the gun is the last damn straw.

Also, before you ask about the kink meme fic: it doesn't matter if it happened or not. Anything that happened in that prison was unprovable. Therefore, it never happened. Therefore, it doesn't freaking matter. Don't let it get into your headcanon. Sometimes things aren't real even when they did happen.

Now get me whatever passes for decent vodka on this planet and find a game that won't break me. There's got to be one or two out there that aren't nightmares.

Comments

[sailorlaughter]

Okie-dokie-lokie! [Beams]

[gunslingerguy]

It's not condescending for me to pet you, is it?

[sailorlaughter]

Nope! I don't think so!

[gunslingerguy]

Just thought I'd ask. Wouldn't want to offend you. Not much in the way of non-humanoids in my universe.

[sailorlaughter]

We've got all SORTS of things in Equestria! The closest thing to a human-shaped creature would probably be a Diamond Dog, though, and they're not very nice.

[gunslingerguy]

What's a Diamond Dog?

[sailorlaughter]

They're like...these big gray monkey-dogs that live underground and collect gems! I dunno why, I'm pretty sure they don't eat them. One time a bunch of them kidnapped my friend Rarity.

[gunslingerguy]

Wait, if they're into gems, why take a pony?

[sailorlaughter]

She's got a special spell that helps her find gems, so she can put them on her dresses!

[gunslingerguy]

Your people put gems on dresses? Mine mostly use them to power magic or technology. Seems like they'd be heavy to wear.

[sailorlaughter]

I guess they're not that heavy. I don't really wear them, I usually just bake the ones I get into cakes for my friend Spike! He's a dragon.

[gunslingerguy]

And dragons eat gems? Huh. Didn't know that, but I've never met a dragon before.

[sailorlaughter]

Yep! That's why they hoard them! Well, that and 'cause they're shiny.

[gunslingerguy]

If he likes shiny things, then does he like tinfoil, too?

[sailorlaughter]

Oh, Spike's not allowed to hoard things. He's just a baby dragon still! I think I have seen him eat foil once or twice, but only when there was chocolate in it.

[gunslingerguy]

Chocolate. I miss that. [Jaeris looks wistful for a moment.] It used to be easy to get ahold of on my world, but I never realized how much I'd miss things like that until I couldn't get ahold of it.

[sailorlaughter]

Do you want some? I've got a few pieces here!

[Yes she just pulled that chocolate bar out of her mane. It's hammerspace in there.]

[gunslingerguy]

...you are a wonderful, wonderful pony. And your world would make me obese. By which I mean heck yeah, I'd like a piece!

[sailorlaughter]

Here you go!

[Pinkie flips that candy bar off her nose to him, then pulls out another for herself.]

[gunslingerguy]

[Cute Jaeris nibbling and savouring chocolate like it's some kind of mythical food. Oh, normal food. He missed it so.]

[sailorlaughter]

You want more? I've got TONS!

[gunslingerguy]

I can't eat too much or too fast, Pinkie. Remember what I said about getting sick on normal food. But... thank you. For everything. You're a good friend.

[sailorlaughter]

Oh! Okie-dokie-lokie, then.

You're welcome! [She beams up at him.] You're a good friend, too!

[gunslingerguy]

[Jaeris pets her with one hand, smiling.] I haven't done anything all that good for you yet. We've just talked.

[sailorlaughter]

Well sure! Friends do lots and LOTS of talking! And also partying, but munny-mun says I shouldn't throw those in dear_mun for the sake of her sanity!