at capeandcowl, canon is The Guild

[egohalfempty]

Let me get this straight.

Your plans for me are... one, I get trapped in some weirdo labyrinth that looks like the Guild Hall. Two, while I'm there, the evil version of avatar spills all of my secrets and threatens to kill me. Then, finally, number three...

I start crushing on a serial killer?

Are you SERIOUS?! I didn't think I could possibly hate you any more, but-- but-- you are just the world's biggest jerk!

Comments

[egohalfempty]

That's close to what I said.

In between all the tears.

You want to know the worst part? She thinks it's funny! How is any of this funny?!

[jailbrake]

Hell if I know, but you ain't gonna get anything done by bitching and moaning about it.

[michiko is
literally the least qualified person to give advice on anything but]

I got a better idea.

[egohalfempty]

[ so is cyd
but that
has never stopped her. girl totally could've been an amateur advice columnist okay ]

Hit me. I mean, it's gotta be better than anything I can come up with.

[jailbrake]

Okay. So the first thing you do, you get an ice cream truck.

[egohalfempty]

What... ?

I can't steal stuff! Okay, there was that one time with the traffic cone, but I was just an accessory! At best.

[jailbrake]

Well, what the hell else are you supposed to run the bastard over with?

[egohalfempty]

What?!

He's an awful guy even if he seems nice right now but I can't just run him over!

[jailbrake]

Look, girly, who's the one with the privilege [privileged...] information here? I'm tellin' you, it'll work for sure.

[egohalfempty]

I'm not sure that's the word you're... never mind.

[ lip. quivering. ] C- can't I just get him thrown in jail? I don't think I have the stomach for vehicular manslaughter. I mean, I once threw up on a guy just because he was wearing fake eyeball makeup. Fake! The thought of really hurting someone makes me want to anxiety vomit.

[jailbrake]

Police there just don't give much of a shit.

[egohalfempty]

Ugggh, I don't want to do this.

I mean, I don't want to get murdered either... or let other people get murdered because I didn't do anything to help, but...