dear_mun | (no subject)

Look, really, this is a positive highlight for me compared to what I usually get.

Well, yeah. I'm amazing in bed. Of course this is positive for you. I get what? Insulted about my family because that's not a low blow?

No. Really not. Seriously, get over yourself. You were adopted. Your parents aren't genetically related to you. They love you. They raised you. They spoiled you rotten. Words carefully chosen.

You're pretty. That doesn't necessarily mean amazing in bed.

You have no idea and I'm not listening to this from you. Some things remain off limits. That is one of them. Hell, that's it. Talk shit about anything else but my parents stay out of this.

[Because it wasn't his parents. It was him needing to measure up to being chosen. If he failed, he wasn't letting down someone that had fucked someone else. He was letting down two people that had done all of that. All because they chose him.]

I'm gorgeous. You're damn lucky to have this shot with me, and the virgin really has no place talking shit about sex, does he? Your carpal tunnel doesn't mean you know what you're doing.

I'm not talking shit about your parents. I'm talking shit about your attitude about your parents. I don't know your parents.

I can think of people I'd sooner have this shot with. Or any shot.

Again, you don't know anything about me and my attitude towards them. You know what I let you know. Not your problem to deal with. Unless you want to start talking about encouraging your dad's drinking. Wanna do that?

Then scamper off, Thumper. You'll be back. Nothing in this town as good as I am.

I'm a terrible person, I know. It keeps me up at night.

Thumper? Seriously?

I thought that was internet porn and drooling over Derek's ink.

<<--- Thumper face

Porn is not interesting enough to keep me up at night. And I'm not really an ink guy.

Dammit. Two seconds of wondering what kind of guy you are may have ended me getting some tonight.

Look, if you feel uncomfortable thinking of me when you're with someone else, no skin off my nose.

I'm not thinking about you. Ever.

Not even while we're talking? That who the hell are you calling Thumper, if not me?

You knew what I meant. You're not even nearly as cute as you think you are.

You have no idea how cute I think I am.

So you're delusional too? Huh. That explains a lot.

I might not think I'm cute at all and instead be putting up a false front of bravado and worthiness.

No, sorry. That's not me.

I'm not falling for your supposed games, Stilinski.

Though if this is how you think you get people into bed, no wonder you're a virgin.

I'm not trying to get you into bed. Frankly, you have way too much ego and self interest to be any good for a poor innocent and virginial boy looking for a good start in the wide world of sexual escapades.

You would be damn lucky to have me get you started. Well, maybe not. You couldn't handle it. You'd spaz out, hit your head and then I'd be blamed for killing you with sex.

I can already picture it. You'd be all, Wham, bam and back to the Porsche, man.

No wonder the muns think you need a bit of pressure to do things right.

You could learn road head and skip the having to go back to the Porsche. It's a good lesson for you to learn.

That isn't what they're thinking. They're into torment and torture!

Okay, so I don't presume to know what a mun thinks. They're all crazy like Peter.

They really are. Seriously on this... Is this something you want?

Look at it from my point of view, Jackson. There are several possibilities going on for me. This is the one I favour over the others. Because the others? Not such good endings for me. I will let you suffer if it means I can avoid Peter's dead, creepy grip.