on reading In The Seraglio of the Complacency of the Goodnight Puppies

[redhairedislandgirl]

Why would you

why would you even

make me read that, mun

I thought things were okay between us, you and I.

then you made me read puppy porn.

I don't want to play this game anymore! I just want to go home and indulge in things not even related to animals. I am never ever talking to Goofy again ever.

Comments

[vainvoid]

Puppy porn? Do I even want to know what this is about?

hey sexy.

[redhairedislandgirl]

no. you really don't.

... hey, wait a minute. You look.. familiar.

What's up

[vainvoid]

How so?

[soyoudonthaveto]

...PUPPY PORN?!?

Sorry Nash, but, to your mun, WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?

[redhairedislandgirl]

[I DID NOT WRITE IT OKAY]

irrelevant!

[soyoudonthaveto]

YOU MADE THIS GIRL FUCKING READ IT! OF COURSE IT'S YOUR FAULT!!

(to Kairi, now with a smile)

Want to go beat her up for making you think of Goofy in the worst way possible?

[cowardsoftware]

porn writing is lyk half the game tho

just try not 2 take it so srsly

[redhairedislandgirl]

bu
wh

it's PUPPIES, though.

and then they wrote porn of merricat and oh god don't tell me I'm next.

this feels like a terrible horror movie, except instead of death it's badly written porn.

[blackberries]

3:

[redhairedislandgirl]

do not mourn me

for I am already gone. :(

[itsbraveanditburns]

DUDE, SHELLY MADE THAT PORN. HE'S RESPONSIBLE FOR THE ORIGINAL WE HAVE ALWAYS LIVED IN THE CAPTURED CASTLE.

WE JUST COMBINED IT WITH OUR OWN TERRIBLE ALCHEMITER-MADE FURRY PORN TO SEE HOW AWFUL THE PRODUCT OF COMBINING TWO REALLY AWFUL THINGS WOULD BE.

[darkfiraga]

Look, just be glad you weren't there for the troll reproductive organs memo, okay.

[redhairedislandgirl]

but I already asked Vladik how they work.

I think you just get too flustered at the thought of touching another person's butt.

[itsbraveanditburns]

HOLY FUCK, KAIRI. I ALREADY TOLD YOU WE DIDN'T ACTUALLY WRITE IT. WE ALCHEMIZED IT. WITH THE ALCHEMITER. USING BOOKS WE ALREADY HAD. IT WAS FOR SCIENCE.

ANYWAY, WHAT DO YOU EXPECT HAPPENS WHEN YOU COMBINE VICTORIAN PORN WITH GOODNIGHT MOON, THE POKEY LITTLE PUPPY, AND COMPLACENCY OF THE LEARNED?

[redhairedislandgirl]

you combined porn with puppies, okay?!

you are still not blameless!

[itsbraveanditburns]

KAIRI.
YOU HAVE NOT YET REALIZED.
IT WAS THEO'S IDEA TO COMBINE THE TWO.
AND EVERYTHING HE TOUCHES TURNS TO PORN.

[redhairedislandgirl]

he is already getting an earful!!!

[itsbraveanditburns]

DON'T TELL ME YOU'RE TRYING TO MAKE HIM STOP HIS PORNOGRAPHER'S WAYS.
IT WON'T WORK.