dear_mun | (no subject)

She's rarely quite that far out of the water. But at least she's working on it.

Steve. *bit of a smile. Guess who is generally set after Steve gets him to remember being Bucky, as opposed to Winter Soldier...*

If she's working on it, then you've got a chance.

[He hadn't been sure if Bucky'd remember him, but this place is supposed to be neutral so he'd figured he'd give it a shot. Ducking his head, he tries to sort through his thoughts, but he just ends up chuckling nervously, stuttering like he had when he was smaller.] Bucky, I - it's - 'M glad you're here.

The question being, a chance for what.

*Oh, he remembers. It hurts a lot, but he remembers. Small sigh, but the next bit is perfectly truthful - and with a smile*

I'm glad you are. Complications notwithstanding.

[Steve really wouldn't have been surprised if Bucky'd thrown a punch, or worse, at him. He's never quite forgiven himself for everything that happened, so he kind of expects Bucky to feel the same way. When the punch doesn't come, he smiles tentatively.]

We can deal with complications. And I'm sure you can deal with whatever your mundane's planning on throwing at you.

*no, anything that Steve did was right, and anything caused - well. Richly deserved. The smile, now that is... possibly less so.

Not that Bucky can quite help it. Not after everything*

Oh, no, she isn't. Aside from the fact that she rarely does that to her people, she isn't really intent on playing me - she just can't get rid of me. ~~Sound familiar?~~ That doesn't mean she knows the last thing about what she's doing.

*shakes head* Enough about that. What is happening to you?

[The smile turns to a grin when Bucky mentions not being able to get rid of him. His mundane had had the same problem, now he's one of the only that seems to get out anymore.]

I'm glad she can't get rid of you. She seems to be doing fine for now. And, whatever she's got planned, at least you're able to get out sometimes.

Depending on the um...verse...I've been zapped smaller, met Peggy again but she - um - disappeared. Met a god. Met Howard's son. I've seen versions of you a couple times - [His expression falters slightly.] - they disappeared too.

My mundane's been thinking about putting me in a game, but she hasn't decided yet.

*dammit, Steve, how u do? Bucky's shoulders relax slightly, just. easier.*

She has... six different characters in three games with activity checks, and several more in looser games. Putting one more anywhere would be... unwise, I agree with that.

I know the disappearing thing's bad. At least she doesn't tend to let anybody go.

[Steve almost winces when his mundane perks up at the mention of looser games. He'd hope to keep out of one of those...]

It's good to know you'll be sticking around. Wouldn't mind seeing you, if - [If you don't hate me for everything.] - when you can get out.

Mine has two characters in games. One might be dropping soon so she thinks she has time for me to be in one. I don't mind the idea but most of them but I worry about the others who might follow me.

Unfortunately, the ones she knows are not... relevant. *one being Tron and the other X-Men.* But yeah, it's... it's good, I guess.

*for the sake of friends. Like Steve.*

Thanks.

... which places? She can't really help the curiosity.

She's thinking about putting me in the game she's keeping. It's called Ruby City. If I go, Howard's son's probably going to follow me. Maybe Thor eventually.

There's another game, she's considering, but it looks slow right now. But that'd probably be good for her since she's been struggling lately.

So... with her majestic delay. Are things settling down at those places?

[Steve manages to surpress a chuckle, but his eyes are bright with laughter.] She didn't send me to the city, but I'm in this place that's kind of like a fairy tale. It's been pretty quiet so far. Just not too sure about being a knight.

Did your mundane decide to send you somewhere?

*yes, Bucky likes that. The brightness. And then his own eyes crinkle in return* You? A knight? I couldn't imagine how such a thing would ever occur to anyone.

*shakes head* Not really, not for now. But she did catch up with the story, at least.

Some book dragged me into this place. [He smiles sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck.] My mundane keeps calling me a beggar knight. None of my armor matches and I have no idea how to ride the horse they gave me. But I got to keep my shield. And some of my team is there.

[He probably shouldn't suggest it since someone in the game will sulk if Bucky says yes, but he can't miss a chance at seeing his best friend again.] You could be a knight too. Or one of the other roles there.

Which story did she catch up on?

... come on, it can't be that different from the bike, can it?

*oh, do tell, making people sulk is always fun...* Do you really think I'd be a knight, Steve? I do work best from the shadows, not in the sunlight.

Ah... most of the story since just before you used the cosmic cube on me. To the end of fear itself.

None of my bikes tried to chew on my hair like Harley does. [Yes, Steve named his horse after his motorcycles.] And they never had a mind of their own.

[Tony will sulk for days if Steve's best friend shows up.] Well, if you don't want to be a knight, 'm sure the place will find a role for you. I almost got another role, but then I would've lost my shield.

Yeah...my mun's been avoiding Fear Itself and some parts of Civil War. The rest she's trying to catch up on.

I've every confidence that you'll find a way to get along with him. *seriously. Mouth. twitching.* You have that way about you, it'd be hard to resist...

*oh, proprietary already, are we? Not to mention the very loving relationship Bucky and Tony tend to have generally.* Let's see, what are the options? Knight, mage, damsel, crook? She *thumb over shoulder* is already laughing at the idea of me in a ragged up dress. And how would that place handle my arm, anyway?

Mine suggests Fear Itself 7.1. And I must admit there were parts of Civil War which I would have liked to avoid, too - especially what your gal went through.

[Steve sees that twitch and grins. He doesn't mind being laughed at, especially when it's Bucky teasing him.] Get along with her. Clint and Tony are going to give me lessons but until then, I'll stick to walking. Safer that way.

[Very proprietary. Little cartoon hearts everywhere whenever Tony's around Steve. But Steve will verbally smack Tony if he gets too snarky with Buck.] You wouldn't have to wear a dress. There's a couple different roles and if nothing fits, you can suggest one as long as you have a reason for it. I almost ended up the Ash Lad since I was a scrawny orphan.

If they allowed Tony's arc reactor, they should allow you to have the arm. It'd just be magic based instead of tech. Or maybe. [He pauses, grateful that Bucky's alive and regretting that he hadn't done more to try to save him.] Maybe the magic would make it so you wouldn't need it anymore.

She'll probably look for that issue soon. She's still dancing around trying to decide if she wants to read it. [Sighing, tries not to think about how that had effected everyone. Not just Sharon but everyone he'd cared about.]

That issue was the first from our canon that my mundane read. 'M surprised she decided to keep me after how she reacted to it.

*definitely amused. And hey, who wouldn't laugh at the mental image of a horse trying to eat Steve's hair! Really!* I see. Well, I'm sure the rich boys can do that for ya.

*hoo boy. In the still highly unlikely scenario where Bucky ends up there, that would explain why Steve's letter was to Tony, of all people... but don't worry, Steve. Bucky can do quite well with snark.* Right. That avenging spirit thing would be tempting if it would be a bit too no-touch. And I can't really claim faithful loyalty that would befit a knight, now can I.

Heh. Considering how many times that thing has been torn from me, cut out, cut through, reattached, and upgraded since I've had it, and how useful it is, I'm not sure having my own arm back would be that much wiser. It's an advantage, not gonna lie, and, well. I did earn it, one way or another.

*another liptwitch* Well, let's see. You get good news, and you get to punch Nick Fury through a couple of walls. I'd say go for it. *softer* It wasn't your fault, Steve. None of it was. And you came through, despite everything staked against you. It's what matters.

... wait, which issue?

[Steve and his mun are hoping that it might become more likely that Bucky ends up there. He needs his best friend and Tony's mun loves the idea, even if it will make Tony sulk. And Steve knows Bucky can hold his own, but he's not going to stand by and do nothing if the snark escalates too much.]

[Despite his smile, there's still a hint of guilt and grief in his eyes.] Even if you were a spirit, I'd still want you there, but we'd all prefer a role where you're alive. I think that you could be a knight. You can't judge someone just be certain parts of their past.
[Steve wouldn't eventually give Bucky his shield if he didn't believe that he was a good man even after everything that had happened before.] But we have a rogue there. That'd probably work.

I wasn't sure if you'd want to keep your arm or have it the way it was before. But you're right. You earned it. If you want to keep it, then you should.

[It's almost impossible not to grin when he considers the idea that he punched Fury through a wall, even if he knows he shouldn't be amused by it. Sometimes he really dislikes SHIELD, especially right after he was revived. But the smile dims slightly.] She saw scans of that, but didn't know what issue it was in. I know it wasn't my fault, but it doesn't make it easier. Never will.

The first one she read was the one of me on the courthouse steps. [His voice is strangely calm considering he's discussing his own death. Or as close to death as he seems capable of.] When I was killed.

That... might just do.

*Fiiine. Bucky does catch that glimmer of sadness, and shakes his head, stepping closer to give his friend a tight hug. Very tight* Hey, whatever happens, I'm coming back, and so did you. Don't you forget that, all right? Not the easy way, it's never easy when we're fighting the fight, but we don't let go of those who matter that easy.

And... I know. It's never easier, and that's why I didn't let them keep you in the dark for even a few more hours, once I was awake. The rest of the world doesn't know and a great big bunch of them don't even care, but you, you and Nat - you've carried the weight of my absence for too long. No more.

Ah. *closes his eyes for a moment* I'd been such a coward. *not able to face Steve. Even when they'd been fighting together again. Maybe if he hadn't run away, things would be different. But... too late for that, now. He's not running away on him now, not any longer.*

Anyway. Can't change the past, and maybe it's a better idea not to try.

((Sneaks the message here instead of the subject line. The game is pretty slow and the AC is almost non existent. The mods even do the AC for you. It's one of the most laid back games I've ever been in.))

[The hug is welcome, especially since most of the time he doesn't know that Bucky is alive. It does feel kind of strange since even after all the years with the serum, part of him still thinks Bucky should be taller.] When was anything ever easy for us? We wouldn't know what to do if it was.

'M glad you told me. If you hadn't, I would've dealt with it, but... [But if he'd found out the truth, even knowing the reasons why he hadn't been told, Steve would be as devastated by those lies as he'd been by Bucky's 'deaths'.]

Even if we could change the past, where would we start? When we were kids or during the war? Too many thing'd change and who knows what that'd lead to?

Thank you. It's less the activity and more keeping track of one more set of storylines that goes with another game. Buuuut I'll poke at the application. ;) And if I do, it'll probably be from the time frame after Steve returns his memories using the Cosmic Cube and before Steve gets killed. For maximum reunion owie... even with the sliiiightly different backstory. Which I may waive, if the mods will let me.

Well, no, if I'd just shown up while you were composing my eulogy, that wouldn't be a good thing. I made Nick tell you. Hence the punching through walls, because he hadn't told you in the first place.

*headshake* No, things will remain as they ever have been. Even if they hurt. Just trying for a better present, right?

There really isn't much going on at the moment. Mostly it's been introductions and small plot lines between the characters that know each other. The tagging is really slow (which I appreciate). Steve won't know anything about the Cube...oh so much reunion fun with that.

Probably best that he didn't. That way it was believable. [Because he never would have been that convincing if he'd known the truth. Knowing that wouldn't make him any less angry or ease his occasional dislike for the man. He still resented the trick with the hospital room.]

Yeah. A better present and a better future.

Well, it was a cosmic cube that was Red Skull's blue thing/tesseract in the movie, he just doesn't know that it's what brought Bucky's memories and all? Augh augh augh my brain, it's fried.

The eulogy? You did fine knowing, I'm told. But it wouldn't have been fair to keep you grieving any longer than they already had. You'll see when you and your mun get through it.

*slight, very slight smile* That's the idea.

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AAAAH I don't have smiling icons for Bucky here yettttt

NP and I'm totally offering the enabling cookies now

<3 SOB SOB BUT TO BRAIN ANOTHER GAAME

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