voicetesting

[ex_elucidation693]

You hardly have a handle on this language yet you wish to attempt me.

Somehow I don't think this is anywhere within the range of an intelligent decision.

Comments

[ex_elucidation693]

[One day, John. One day. Also you get to solve these because you're the only one who cares, there's nothing wrong with toes being stuffed next to the broccoli.]

I vote fridge. You can move your silly dairy and tuna into it and not contaminate my samples.

[He's such a caring creature, isn't he.]

damn you for using that icon <3

[brb_blogging]

Because you've already sullied the one we have now, am I right? [A long-suffering sigh.]

Fine. I'm not putting these back, though.

it describes these two perfectly, imo <3

[ex_elucidation693]

Why not. Open the door and put them back, it honestly doesn't take that much effort to accomplish, why did you take them out in the first place at all?

[DOES NOT GET]

It's true!

[brb_blogging]

[Why is this hard to understand....] Sherlock, I am not going to have you keep your experiments next to food we're going to eat.

You say it's perfectly sealed and safe, and I don't bloody buy it.

[ex_elucidation693]

You think I'm being directly misleading about what I put in the fridge.

Is there some hidden mystery to your common intelligence that's been kept from me all these years, John, because I don't see why you're being disingenuous to my reasoning when you - or anyone yet - has to prove me wrong in anything.

Your food is safe. I'm not going to poison you beyond your inability to tell castor oil from honey, you're an adult, keep yourself informed and leave my kidneys alone.

[brb_blogging]

You know what--you being catty about it just lost you the kidneys. [So very casually, and no, John does not regret a thing. There are times when he is just not in the mood for Sherlock's... well. There are times when he's just not in the mood.]

[ex_elucidation693]

[This is Mr. Punchline, he's going to trip you on the way to the trash can.

No regrets either, on here.

Also, guess it's time to sign for that medical school purchase for the decapitated head. Gotta text Lestrade for a heads-up, now.]

[brb_blogging]

[This is John falling into the trash bin and getting kidneys all over the kitchen floor. This would be John swearing loudly and chucking the container at Sherlock's head in a fit of bad temper.]

[ex_elucidation693]

[kasjfhsdf]

Are you an infant?

[there's a word here for this, it starts with H and ends in ITE.]

[brb_blogging]

[Scrambling to get back up to his feet, covered in slime and trying his best to keep himself from punching Sherlock right in the face.]

For your sake, I am going to pretend you didn't say that. [Don't you dare tempt him, Sherlock Holmes. Don't do it.]

[ex_elucidation693]

You could have just put them back.

[Were you expecting him to be nice? You touched his things. You know how well these things work out for you in 221B.]

[brb_blogging]

[Do not throw a kidney at him, Watson, do not do it.]

Yes, well, now they're all over everywhere.

[ex_elucidation693]

I'm not cleaning it up.

[Pause.]

It's of no use to me on the floor, you see.

[brb_blogging]

Of course you won't. [Of course not. That was okay. John didn't say one damn word. Time to find a bloody mop. And disinfectant.]

[ex_elucidation693]

[Is Watson giving the sad vibes? ...D: ]

You're angry.

[brb_blogging]

Caught that, did you? Bravo. [But now he knows he's losing his temper.]

[ex_elucidation693]

Your breathing pattern's become erratic and there's visible tension along the line of your shoulders, did...

I've made you angry, haven't I.

[brb_blogging]

[He doesn't speak for a moment, trying to grab the sodding kidneys with a paper towel. He's trying to calm himself down, in reality, because as much of a right royal pain Sherlock can be... he's very naive, somehow.]

Yes.

[ex_elucidation693]

[He thinks he understands; he does. He just can't sympathize at all.]

...You can have the top shelf of fridge.

Top shelf only.

[He's not saying sorry but he can compromise here.]

[brb_blogging]

[That surprises him, and strangely, makes him feel even worse than before.]

...Fine. Deal. [John isn't going to look a gift horse in the mouth. But now he's standing there awkwardly with someone's kidneys in his hands, wondering if he should apologize or be done with it all or. Well. What he should do.]

[ex_elucidation693]

[Life with Sherlock: making you feel bad for being a decent human being.

He does stare at John like he ought to get a move on, but is trying to be somewhat polite about it now. Somewhat.]

It's always a good idea to incinerate long-dead body parts, in lieu of a compost heap.