update

[sentient]

Why does it have to be so complicated to get one dude to kiss another dude?
I think he knows what the problem was just as well as I do, though I don't see how it could get more special than mackin' in front of an exploding volcano, which, by the way, was hella phallic and totally inappropriately indicative.
Lava squirting everywhere, shuddering out the depths of that rock hard mesa.
Let's do it again sometime, Jake.

Comments

[cyanbeast]

What exactly happened?!

[help her out here glasses she's really lost.]

[sentient]

We synced up. DS kissed, like, all the babes.
It was rad.

[cyanbeast]

Yes I saw Jake kissing Dirk's decapitated head with my own eyes, thank you very much.
But I still don't understand how so much happened in such a short time.
Dirk couldn't have possibly planned THAT far in advance in an emergency situation!
...Could he?

[Because when she thinks about it, it is Dirk they're talking about.]

[sentient]

Doesn't matter if he did or not because it worked out perfectly.
If I tell you he did, you'd probably be even more freaked out about such huge foresight re: cutting his own head off and timing when and where to necro you and Roxy, and if I tell you he didn't plan any of it you'd freak out 'cause you'd wonder what would have happened if none of it worked out.
But it worked out, so we're basically fine for now, aside from standing under a volcano.

[scrumsandwhatnot]

Jesus friggin christ.

[sentient]

I want another smooch.

[scrumsandwhatnot]

I dont flippin think so!!
I still have no idea what the fuck is going on TO BE QUITE HONEST.

[sentient]

Don't be a tease.
Kiss me, Jake.
You did it before, Jake.
Jake, just lean in and kiss me.
Then I'll explain everything.

[testifies]

You have to admit.
We were really ahead of our game here.

[sentient]

I don't recall factoring Freudian Mountain into the thing, but it worked out well.

[testifies]

Sometimes these things just happen. Don't kick a horse in the mouth when opportunity comes knocking.

"Lil Hal"?

[ladyslayer]

HA HA HA HA HA.
SORRY IM KIND OF BUSY KISSING HEADS THAT ARE ALIVE.
Which is actually a lie because i dont make a point of kissing innocent decapitated heads no matter whose visage they are!!
That was a one time deal bucko if everyone i knew didnt happen to be hightailing it to corpseville i wouldnt have put my mouth anywhere near any dead orifices belonging to anyone.

[sentient]

For a dude so deep in denial, you sure were enthusiastic about the kiss once you actually did it.
Your jacket was even fluttering in the breeze.
You had one foot up on the rock.
You looked like an action hero, and you basically owe that to me.
You should be thanking me, Jake.
Now kiss me again.

[ladyslayer]

Oh my flipping christ on a cracker can we just bury this entire moment and never talk about it ever again?
Who am i kidding of course we cant because youre such a CHOICE BRO.
The palest of pals!!!!

[niaev]

bow chika wow wow ;3
did u even see all that sick rocketsnugglin action i got in on???
i got 2 touch ur BOOTAY

[sentient]

Yeah. I'm sure that were I able to feel it, I'd be blushin' right now.

[niaev]

it its ok boy next time it happens ill make damn sure that its ur rump im gettin firksy wit
*friksy
*gonnan touch all up n ur butt

[hearticulate]

Nobody grasped the dick reference.
Thanks for pointing it out. Such an observation was, to be honest, a quintessential cog in this convoluted maze of gears serving as the metaphor for our current situations.

[sentient]

You're welcome.
Dick.

[hearticulate]

Cute self-designation, though. Props, I guess.

[nukeoleptic]

lmfao

[sentient]

You're not Jake, but you can kiss me anyway.

[nukeoleptic]

hahaha i appreciate it
but i think i have kissed enough striders for one life time
jesus i hope the corpsesmooching is done with

[tipsygnostalgia]

i c youve been causing trouble again
so much smoochign goig on everwhere like WOW

[sentient]

It worked out great. Everyone got a piece of the action.