Tumblr broke his brain for the umpteenth time.

[gammabruce]

I'm at a loss for words here, mun. Something like this simply would not happen. I know you had hopes, your mindspace practically screams them at me sometimes, but it's just not feasible.

I couldn't take the risk of something going wrong. Which means it'd have to be very, very safe, and slow, and downright boring. Certainly nothing like... well, that. Besides, I don't even own that many necklaces, and...

I mean, I'm not actually thinking about it. I'm only pointing out how things would go if, hypothetically speaking, we ventured into a relationship beyond professional. Which we wouldn't, except as friends, and I think we already are.

No, I don't mean friends with-- actually, I'm not going to finish that statement. Discussion is over.

Comments

[lunging]

[SERIOUSLY VOLSTAGG YOU ARE THE BEST AND WORST BRO AT THE SAME TIME]

Oh, in that case, I'll have to take them for runs whenever Father and Mother need private time and therefore I am kept on babysitting duty.

For my knees' sake, of course.

[voluminous_one]

[Is that not the ideology of the Warriors Three?]

As long as you do not lose any of them. I'd rather face the wrath of Surtur than that of my wife any day.

[lunging]

[Ask Hogun. Maybe we'll get an answer out of him this century. We can try!]

I would rather face death than your wife in a foul mood, that is no exaggeration.

[Yeah handing over her kids hopped on sugar was something Fandral was never, ever tempted to do.]

[voluminous_one]

Aye, t'is no wonder I am known as the bravest of Odin's warriors, as I live under the threat of more than one Ragnarok at any given time.

[lunging]

The bravest? My, my, how highly the Valiant thinks of himself today!

[voluminous_one]

Am I not the Lion of Asgard?

[lunging]

[Oh you had to go there.]

Only because your overwhelming, voluminous hair is reminiscence of a lion's mane. A male lion does not hunt, you know.

...perhaps that is why you and your wife are such a beautiful match.

[voluminous_one]

Hmph! The lion does however, defend his pride and land to his last breath.

Perhaps at the next feast I should do more like a Lion and leave you only scraps.

[lunging]

You say that as though you leave anything behind at a feast. You would sooner hide those scraps beneath your helm for later than toss them at a starving dog.

[voluminous_one]

More so now, were that starving dog named Fandral.

[lunging]

Said starving dog would not be starving. He would be flawless.

[voluminous_one]

Though still a dog.

[lunging]

Don't let Sif hear you say that; she already treats me like one enough as is.

[voluminous_one]

Then the Lady Sif has my thanks.

[lunging]

[HAVE THE HARDEST OF BACK CLAPS

you're good people bro

never change xoxo]

[voluminous_one]

[HAVE A BEARHUG IN RETURN, BECAUSE VOLSTAGG]