Second Try

[amon_fire]

 Dear Mun...

Uh... sorry the original post got deleted. I didn't know I had to talk to you. Just, y'know... you're kind of lame. Didn't... didn't really want to talk to you.

But, uh, I guess this gives me a second chance to... to do that... comedy thing I do. So, uh...

Yeah.

Anyway, I'd love to stay and chat, but, uh...

AMON a tight schedule!

...

Did... Did you get it?

Amon?

I'm on?

... You suck, mun.

XOXO,
Amon

Comments

[amon_fire]

... You're a dick.

[smackdownsoup]

I'm a dick, but at least I'm not putting people in danger because people don't think I'm funny.

See, it's funny because the fandom thinks I'm funny and I've never hurt anyone.

[SHIRO, DON'T SASS COMEDY AMON]

[HE'S MORE DANGEROUS THAN NORMAL AMON AND TARRLOK]

[amon_fire]

Oh.

Well, I have to say, ignoring how dangerous I am is a...

Shiro-versight.

...

Get it? Sheer oversight?

well, *I* think it's funny

[smackdownsoup]

You can't just threaten people into laughing at your jokes! That's the sort of stunt I'd expect from Tarrlok!

I'm not laughing on principle.

[amon_fire]

I'm not threatening them. I'm changing the world so they'll... have to laugh at my...

Okay, uh... it doesn't make a lot of sense, but I came up this plan back in art school, uh...

Yeah.

[smackdownsoup]

[OBJECTION!]

So you were able to afford and go to college after all!

[amon_fire]

What?

Yeah, did I say I didn't?

I'm sorry, man, sometimes I just open my mouth and... I dunno, man, it's like a flood. A flood of words.

[smackdownsoup]

You said, "Some of us never went to school because we were too busy being orphans."

How did you even manage to pull off taking over the city?

[it was the lieutenant, wasn't it]

[amon_fire]

[... Seriously? That bumbler? The guy can't stand up to a lone Polar Bear Dog.]

I dunno, man, I just, like, told people what I thought.

[smackdownsoup]

Your gift's not comedy, it's managing to survive so long as a leader without getting yourself killed.

[Comedy Amon, it is Shiro's professional opinion that you are dumb as a brick.]

[amon_fire]

Actually, my gift if the ability to strip benders of their imperfection.

Also, I can pain with my toes.

[smackdownsoup]

At least, for our new leader, you don't seem particularly malevolent.

[amon_fire]

Meh. Not yet.

[smackdownsoup]

Not yet?

[amon_fire]

Give it a few weeks. I'll start bombing people at random.

[smackdownsoup]

You what?!

[NEVER MIND, THIS AMON CAN DIE IN THE FINALE]

[amon_fire]

What?

Not, like, because I hate them, or anything. I just get bored, y'know?

[smackdownsoup]

You're worse than Tarrlok!

[amon_fire]

Whoa, dude. Low blow.