Director Fury (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
motherfuckin_avengers) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
dear_mun2012-06-10 12:16 pm
motherfuckin_avengers) wrote in dear_mun2012-06-10 12:16 pm
"Let that which is unsaid be said"? Funny, pretty sure I've heard all these threats before.
You, Stark, have an unprecedented and unbroken record of 45 consecutive absences.
That's not a compliment or an achievement, by the way.
That's not a compliment or an achievement, by the way.
Edited 2012-06-10 16:33 (UTC)
[Gasp! How dare you insinuate such a thing.]
It's forty four and you know it. I was ... at least half-present for that one where Barton took three bathroom breaks in a half hour. You might want to get that checked out, by the way, I've heard prostate cancer and uncontrollable bladder impulses are pretty common for compromised assassins these days.
It's forty four and you know it. I was ... at least half-present for that one where Barton took three bathroom breaks in a half hour. You might want to get that checked out, by the way, I've heard prostate cancer and uncontrollable bladder impulses are pretty common for compromised assassins these days.
You were still hungover from god only knows what you were doing the night before.
[The mention of prostate-cancer, however, earns a slightly arched brow. Nothing else. Just his usual stone cold face]
Why are you telling me this instead of him?
[The mention of prostate-cancer, however, earns a slightly arched brow. Nothing else. Just his usual stone cold face]
Why are you telling me this instead of him?
I was fine. You should consider yourself lucky Pepper thought that meeting was important enough to get me up at all. [She owes him sexual favors for that one.]
[The answer, to him, is obvious.]
He's an assassin. I would really like to avoid taking an arrow to the knee just for helping the guy out.
[The answer, to him, is obvious.]
He's an assassin. I would really like to avoid taking an arrow to the knee just for helping the guy out.
Sometimes I think I should have hired Pepper to be your keeper.
[Siiiigh]
Alright. I'll take it under advisement.
[Siiiigh]
Alright. I'll take it under advisement.
In my defense, sir, I've been quite busy in the lab while your team rebuilds my room. Speaking of which, a cot in the hallway, while familiar, is not suitable for a full night of sleep.
I'm not being included in your little group exercise, Director Fury?
I'm hurt.
I'm hurt.
Your record of missed meetings is significantly lower than the others. I just wanted to make my intentions clear to everyone
I don't need a letter to tell you to clean up the motherfuckin' mess you made of New York City.
Duly noted. I'll make an effort to schedule tests around the meetings.
But it would have been so much more civil if you had!
Surely you of all people, know about collateral damage? Sometimes it's a city, sometimes it's a... subordinate.
That's never stopped you from turning it to your advantage in the past.
Surely you of all people, know about collateral damage? Sometimes it's a city, sometimes it's a... subordinate.
That's never stopped you from turning it to your advantage in the past.
I would appreciate it if you did. I feel like I should start giving Rogers gold stars for his spotless attendance record.
You don't exactly have a P.O. box and it's hard to get mail all the way to Asgard.
[ Ooh, no rise to the bait? Bravo, Director... ]
I'll make a special trip to Midgard just for you. I wouldn't want you to be put out your way.
I'll make a special trip to Midgard just for you. I wouldn't want you to be put out your way.
In my defense, I was out of town during the last meeting. And the one before that was during the whole... you know. Brainwashed thing.
[Ahaha- oh man, the boss is pissed, isn't he?]
[Ahaha- oh man, the boss is pissed, isn't he?]
I've noted those excuses. This is a general warning for everyone. Especially Stark
[He prides himself on remaining calm in the face of insane gender-bent criminals]
Or maybe I should just direct-mail some footage of you and your army leveling Midgard and let your daddy handle things from there?
Or maybe I should just direct-mail some footage of you and your army leveling Midgard and let your daddy handle things from there?
You know some of us have other jobs right?
Though Stark is just doing it on purpose.
Though Stark is just doing it on purpose.
As long as it doesn't blow your cover, I expect you to be there for every meeting that you can.
[ She likewise refuses to snap at him for that remark. ]
Odin is not my father. I am Loki -- not Odindottir, not Laufeydottir -- only Loki. Send your missive to Asgard if you want, human.
Odin is not my father. I am Loki -- not Odindottir, not Laufeydottir -- only Loki. Send your missive to Asgard if you want, human.
Oh yeah! Any of them would have blown my cover. Yep, that's it.
I would be pleased to attend the meetings of your war council, as soon as I am able to return to Earth.
Then you're excused.
[Huff]
This is mostly for Stark anyway.
[Huff]
This is mostly for Stark anyway.
Just make sure Loki gets lock up good and tight in Asgard.
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