stupid!Luke makes his DW debut...canon point is pre-Empire

[not_a_farmer]

Oh c'mon. It wasn't bad enough that you dragged me through that other place, but now I have to be here too?

I have important things to do! The Rebels need me!

[Deep shouldered sigh.]

Well, at least maybe someone here will tell me the "big secret?"

Comments

[not_a_farmer]

What kind of close?

[neverjoinyou]

She, ah, loves us. Like a brother.

[not_a_farmer]

[Thunk, thunk, thunk. Luke headdesks like a boss.]

Great. Just great.

[neverjoinyou]

Luke, um...

She is our sister.

[not_a_farmer]

Our...sister?

[neverjoinyou]

Yeah. Like... same parents.

[not_a_farmer]

...

Are there any other surprise family members I need to know about?

[neverjoinyou]

Not that I know of. But hey, what do I know? I was as clueless as you were, once.

[not_a_farmer]

I'm not clueless! I know...things. Stuff. Ya know...

[neverjoinyou]

You didn't know that. And neither did I. So for all I know, Han's our uncle.

Which...

Okay I really hope not.

[not_a_farmer]

Why not? That would be all right...

[neverjoinyou]

Not for Leia, it wouldn't.

[not_a_farmer]

What does...

Oh, you've got to be kidding me.

[neverjoinyou]

Yeah. No.

I mean not that I... I mean... I think it's great. They should be very happy together.

[not_a_farmer]

But, but...she's too good for him!

[neverjoinyou]

Don't tell her that. And you know... Han's a good man. He grows on you.

[not_a_farmer]

Yeah. I guess.

[But there's still pouting.]

[neverjoinyou]

Yeah. I know.

[not_a_farmer]

[Sigh.]

Any other surprises?

[neverjoinyou]

Let's see... Do you know Yoda yet?

[not_a_farmer]

Who?

...

Okay, I guess that answered that question.

[neverjoinyou]

Okay, great. I can save us some embarrassment. Ben tells us to go find Yoda, a great Jedi master, on Dagobah. And he is. A great Jedi master, I mean. But he's also a tiny old green guy, so... Just warning you, don't make fun of him because you'll feel really stupid later when he starts talking about how much of a loser you are.

[not_a_farmer]

The great Jedi master is little and green. How does that--

Hey! I'm not a loser!

[neverjoinyou]

I didn't say you were! I said he starts talking about it.

And he's kind of cute when you get used to him, but... yeah.

[not_a_farmer]

A cute Jedi master?

It's getting harder and harder to buy into all this Force stuff. The Jedi seem to be liars and...and...cute.