new to dw. be gentle with me yo

[coolness]

hey sup

so my mun thought it would be legit smart to do one of these things when theres like a million and one daves walking around

i know im pretty used to that but he isnt and hes being a genuine fucktard

just let me handle this shit and lay back

anyway whats crackalackin

Comments

[youlikefishilikefish]

Pssht, okay, sorry, didn't mean to downplay your 'natural talent'. You're just too excellent.

[coolness]

its all good
as long as we come to agreement about that i think well be fine
your mun has to be pretty ok if they thought it was a good decision to come chat it up with dave motherfuckin strider
at least thats my opinion

[youlikefishilikefish]

I mean, she thinks you're pretty excellent and actually means it. I'm not so easily convinced. Can you fly or blow shit up with your mind or anything because if not, forget it.

[coolness]

hell yeah thats what im talking about
flying and blowing shit up is so lame dude
i could fly before i even hit god tier
what does that tell you
my sweet duds should already be a marking of authenticity of how much of a badass i am

[youlikefishilikefish]

Your sweet . . . duds.

You mean the hood?

[coolness]

fuck the hood
i mean the hood is pretty awesome
but it fucks my hair up when i pull it off and it takes a good 2 minutes to fix it
im talking about the whole package
this shit is the equivalent of direct tv's ultra package with like 480 stations and porn on half of them

[youlikefishilikefish]

So the sweet tights.

Are you talking about your sweet tights.

[coolness]

yes
my sweet tights is apart of that package
unless you thought package was a euphemism for my crotch
ok i guess it kind of us but i didnt mean to
fuck it
yeah my tights

[youlikefishilikefish]

. . . Okay, anybody who has the balls to wear tights is pretty excellent. Congrats.

[coolness]

basically
its not like i chose to wear this
it just kind of appeared on my hot naked bod
im just rolling with the punches here

[youlikefishilikefish]

Hard life, man, hard life.

[coolness]

i know right
im glad someone can appreciate the problems in my life
everyone just fucks with me and its retarded
these clothes are a double edged sword
do you know how hard it is to take a piss

[youlikefishilikefish]

I can imagine, so don't, you know - no details.

[coolness]

aw man
just when i thought you were here to listen to my struggles
can i at least complain about how fuckin hot it gets
can i please

[youlikefishilikefish]

Hold on, let me cover my ears - okay - okay - go.

[coolness]

ok where to start
wait what the fuck dont cover your ears
now its like im talking to myself again
can you lip read or something

[youlikefishilikefish]

What?!

[coolness]

dammit man i refuse to move my hands from my pockets
youre just gonna have to sit there and watch my pouty lips move up and down
ill even throw a compliment out there cause i know you wont hear it
you are a cool dude

[youlikefishilikefish]

. . . Okay that's actually kind of boring.

[hands downnn]

I'm all ears, tell me about your crotchsweat problems, I guess.

[coolness]

nah the moments past
i dont feel like it anymore
lets do something surprising and talk about you
do you have to deal with crotchsweat

[youlikefishilikefish]

Aw, Mr. Sensitive!

I wear spandex all day yes I have to deal with crotchsweat.

[coolness]

damn man nice get up
just kidding what the fuck is up with all that yellow
are you on a team comprised of human bees

[youlikefishilikefish]

I didn't design that shit. The guy who designed it now looks like a blue bear because he shot himself in the ass with mysterious, untested serum, so, you know, not the best judgment, obviously.

Anyway, shut up, at least there's no hood.

[coolness]

he shot himself in the ass with an untested serum
is it me or does that sound unambiguously homosexual
im not judging though man
if you feel like you can pull off the human bee then go for it
might as well get a hood with antennas though

[youlikefishilikefish]

I don't know, he did pass up a chance at the only non-psychotic girl around so.

If I wanted to be a human bee I'd be an awesome human bee, okay.