On bringing Lassie into A_Facility

[wedonthaveballs]

So.

Mun.

Let me get this straight.

Because I am not allowed to have a gun, or will not have my own upon entrance into this ... madhouse of misfits, you've decided that I'll go to my 'old-time' survival instincts - stay off camera, forage for food, live in the woods because obviously I've stumbled onto a government conspiracy and they're out to kill me, and I can't trust any of the technology, or anyone there.

Also, I'm going to believe that it's Spencer's fault.

...yeah, that sounds about right.

Carry on.

Comments

[littleblonderiddle]

...Don't you think that's maybe giving Shawn just a bit too much credit?

[wedonthaveballs]

Nothing doing. I would completely believe that Spencer would set up an elaborate prank slash horrible mental experiment to get me.

[littleblonderiddle]

I don't know, with his attention span? I think he'd be more likely to superglue your coffee mug onto your desk, or something a little less time-consuming like that.

Forage for food? Really?

[wedonthaveballs]

Hmm. Fair. Guster's probably the mastermind.

Like I'm going to trust this 'cafeteria'.

[littleblonderiddle]

He'd have more common sense than to actually execute a plan like that. Just out of curiosity, do you ever not automatically think of either Shawn or Gus whenever something goes wrong?

And foraging is the safer option?

[wedonthaveballs]

Not when it's clear that something this insane would be right up their alley, nope. Because you have to admit, this place is downright crazy.

Food that I can test myself before it's cooked? Damned right. I don't know what that megalomaniac computer has gotten into.

[littleblonderiddle]

Right. Of course. [ She'll just indulge him, since she suspects they'll never see eye to eye about Shawn and Gus, anyway. ]

Computer? Okay, I'm starting to see your point. Maybe there's still a chance your mun will decide not to send you there, after all? You never know with them.

[wedonthaveballs]

Of course, this level of diabolical behavior might be beyond the two of them ... so it might be Henry. Yeah. Henry. I'd believe Henry capable of all this. Just to teach a life lesson or some crap like that.

[A thoughtful pause] Well ... honestly, I'm not sure how long she thought I might have to forage. Or that I might have other options. [Folds his arms over his chest] Keep talking, O'Hara.

[littleblonderiddle]

I just don't think it would be high on Mr. Spencer's to-do list, even if he were capable of it. Unless, of course, you've done something recently to upset him.

[ Oh man, being put on the spot now. Sometimes her optimism has its downsides. ]

Oh, well, based on what information I've gathered so far, there seem to be several of these places referred to as games, although each of them seems to have some kind of unfavorable trait to them. And uh, apparently these muns can't always be trusted to stick to their decisions. I mean, mine is still trying to figure out where to send me, and she keeps changing her mind almost every hour, so. Maybe there's hope for you too, Carlton.

[wedonthaveballs]

No.

Not today, anyways.

[He pursues his lips, and sighs.]

Well, I'll keep my options ... fluid. [He doesn't sound hopeful, merely grim.]

[littleblonderiddle]

Don't worry, I'm sure you'll manage just fine wherever you'll end up in. I have full faith in you, partner.

[ Still, it's probably a good thing for everyone else if there are no guns involved. ]

Try to look at the bright side, it could always be worse? It could be that sex island place I've heard about.

[shockinglyold]

Sounds like someone needs a good cup of coffee and clue.

[wedonthaveballs]

I often could use a reliable clue and a good cup of joe, missy.

Doesn't mean I'm wrong here.

[shockinglyold]

Well you'll get plenty of clues where you're going. Though we keep our coffee pretty tight.

[wedonthaveballs]

That ... is going to be inconvenient.

[shockinglyold]

So you planned on taking our coffee but not our food?

[wedonthaveballs]

I was going to test it first.

[shockinglyold]

By stealing it. I'll fry your ass if you touch my coffee.

[wedonthaveballs]

Well I'm hardly going to be walking into your apartment and taking it. That's stealing.

Under the California Penal Code, it would also be considered breaking and entering, and theft, but still. Only if I steal it out of your apartment.

[shockinglyold]

Stealing is stealing, no matter where you steal it from.

[wedonthaveballs]

[There is literally the grinding together of teeth.]

Then I'll just go without, now won't I?

[shockinglyold]

Can you do that?

[Seriously, this guy looks like he'll become savage without his coffee.]

[wedonthaveballs]

I'm going to have to. I do not steal.

[shockinglyold]

You could just get to know people on the ship. We share ... mostly.

[wedonthaveballs]

[Folds his arms over his chest.]

And I should trust any of you right off the bat because ...?

[shockinglyold]

Because otherwise you'll be forgiving for food in our bloody greenhouse. Which, is also stealing.

[wedonthaveballs]

Fine. I can eat roots. And bark. Bark is very nutritious for you, you know. The soldiers used to eat it when supplies ran low in the Civil War.

[shockinglyold]

So you're going to kill our air supply by eating it's roots.

[wedonthaveballs]

I'm one person - I can't eat all the roots in one damned day!

[shockinglyold]

And how long do you intend to be playing survivor?

[wedonthaveballs]

I don't know ... but there are worms and bugs I can eat as well, so don't worry about your precious trees.

[shockinglyold]

There are no worms or bugs.

[psychouts]

Yeah, sounds like something my dad would set up as one of those teaching moments that he swears you'll thank him for later. But I gotta say. It's a really late later and no thanks feel forthcoming.

Weird though, he's sworn off them since his last teaching moment taught me the opposite of what he wanted. And he usually saves those for family...

...is this your way of telling me that you've been adopted? Am I finally getting the little brother I never wanted? Do you want the top bunk or the bottom bunk?

[wedonthaveballs]

...Spencer, I would sooner ... just ... No.

[He points a finger at Shawn, his teeth gritted together.]

Just. No.

[shockinglyold]

[See that? That's a big smile.]

I like him! Can we have him too?