dear_mun | canon is far cry 4, voictesting our great king

Hello? Is this thing on? What do you mean I'm not talking into a camera, isn't this being televised or-- Or, what is it called again... Ah, streamed? No?! Fucking... Gary! Gary! Ah, right, Gary isn't here. Remind me to dock his wages for this. Lazy shit not coming with me to this--

Hello, boys and girls and those who don't quite fit into the gender binary! It's your King here, Pagan Min, wishing you all a very happy holiday season. In this time, please remember who it is that has guaranteed your survival, your happiness, over the past year, and give thanks. You can thank me now or later, however do keep in mind anyone who... forgets to express their appreciation will be executed for treason.

Now, if all of you could just do a nice little turn away from your screens for a moment, I would appreciate it greatly. Are you turned? Good!

Since everyone's gone, mun, I suppose we can discuss our future together. I'm thinking a complete takeover. Heads rolling, blood, guts - not near me, of course, I have people for that - but I wanted your opinion since we're partners now, I suppose. Peas in a pod, birds of a feather, etc, etc. First thing's first, though, I'll need you to dig up a nice little Yuma for me. Oh, Ajay, too! We can finally have a nice family dinner and discuss things a little further, yes?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

~~[ poor gary, we hardly knew ye ]~~

You really think that anyone here even knows who you are? [ not that mouthing off at the king of kyrat is particularly high on his list of priorities, no; it's mostly a genuine question, since, well. ajay barely knew anything about the guy himself until pagan made it a personal point to abduct him for some crab rangoon. ]

That's why we introduce ourself to people. [ all of a sudden, pagan doesn't look like he's getting into the christmas spirit anymore. no, now he's annoyed. good one, ajay. ] Y'know, unless you're you, in which case you just shoot them in the face like a fucking lunatic.

Speaking of which, you've caused quite a mess, my boy. Been a real little shit, slaughtering your way up my mountain. What would you mother think, hm? Naughty, naughty, little Ajay.

Don't talk about my mom.

[ the words come out in a snap before he can think to stop himself. backpedal, ajay... ]

If you didn't want me to do any of that, then why didn't you call off your attack dogs? [ or don't. poking the bear sounds like a winning strategy, ajay, keep at it. ] Besides, I haven't shot anyone who wasn't asking for it.

Why not? Ishwari was a wonderful woman. [ and he means that. although her son's a golden path loving, 'oooh king min is the devil, stop kicking puppies' tool, he knows she wouldn't have let him turn out this way if she was still around. ]

Asking for it... Yes, I'm sure each of my men politely lay down their weapons and asked for a nice soup to be made from their brains. The screaming? Probably just 'oh, shoot me harder, Ajay, I still have a few pieces of my skull!' Truly, boy, you're not that dense, are you?

What, so I should have just— rolled over and let them shoot me, instead? Because that's the only thing that would have happened if I didn't defend myself.

[ leaving aside the fact that he's been the instigator on several, several occasions. as far as he's concerned, it still just boils down to him fighting for his life... right? ]

'Complete takeover'

[smirk]

That's pretty funny.

Would you prefer 'total'? 'Utter'? Wait, let me get a thesaurus, I'm sure I can think of more words.

[You and your fancy suit and fancy accent - he has no idea if he's amused by you or what]

That I do not doubt - but, instead of wasting time with that bullshit, I think I wanna see you try your little 'takeover'

[Have some sarcastic hand gestures to go with that]

Edited 2014-12-27 22:19 (UTC)

[ that tends to be the typical reaction. thankfully most people figure it out around the time he's stabbed them in the back for texting at the dinner table. ]

Takeovers - proper ones, not like that little fiasco you and your coke-addled pals orchestrated - take time, my boy. I can't just snap my fingers and have the world bowing at my feet, I need to understand the economy, the culture, what the people hold dear. It's quite a complicated process.

And for the record, Vic, Voc, Van - whatever your name is - I'm still rather sore about what you did to Christopher Mintz-Plasse. He seemed like such a nice boy.

I'd wager you know what the fuck my name is. Can't say I know yours, ese

[A snarl pricks at the corner of his mouth while he speaks. This guy isn't like Hoyt, but he's rapidly getting the feeling he'll piss him off just as much. Although, his expression is replaced just as quickly with a nasty smile, this time accompanied by a short laugh]

Ahh, so you were watching! He was a good sport, eh? Knew how to get views, how to really make an audience root for him, all the crying and the yelling...But you know, I didn't do anything the people didn't vote for.

[The torture and forced cannibalism aside.]

You know how many views that fucking video has now..? I don't even know, that's how fucking many.

W-what's "treason?" Yh-you don't need a motive to stage a bloodbath. Just a will.

I-I want to see, the measure of your will.

Treason, my dear boy, is when people don't do what I tell them. [ what are you, 3? pagan doesn't say it, but that condescending-ass tone makes it pretty obvious. ]

Alrighty then. How about you crawl back into whatever dirty little pit you managed to stumble out of, and I'll resume ruling a country? Sounds guh-good to me. [ don't make fun of people who stutter pagan, you giant dick. ]

[He speaks haltingly but it's hardly notable next to the fact he's almost naked; the young man's wardrobe ends with a pair of briefs and Crocs.]

I didn't crawl out. I arose. Th-to rule, is to pick up the shit after your dogs. Y-your responsibilities can wait.

[He starts to approach the glorious despot, all the while smiling with shut teeth. He takes the man's shoulders, then dusts them off with care.]

Life can leave us in a second. Is it fun, th-to end it with the snap of a finger?

[ yes, he picked up on the unique wardrobe choices. honestly pagan's seen far worse, so the nudity doesn't bother him much. the crocs, however... ]

'Arose'. Well, don't you know a big word. Perhaps I'll give you a cookie later.

[ disgusting. pagan's face falls, his expression annoyed when those hands, so disgusting, touch his suit. his lip curls slightly, and he vaguely wonders in he should get this brat in the throat with a pen, or just have someone torture him for a few days. ]

You touch me again, and I'm going to gut you. Is that clear?

[He watches Min's expression sour with the look of a curious beast. It'll take more to discourage him.]

W-why's that? Anyone can be touched, e-even you.

[He knows the threat is meant to the letter, as it should be! That's a plan he can get behind. The man before him emanates death and this hardly repels him. Quite the opposite.]

Send me, th- ... the meanest thugs on your payroll. I'll make 'em cry, like children. Y-you might even enjoy it.

... Mind repeatin' that for me, love?

'Love'? I'm more of a 'sugarpie' kind of man, myself.

Really now? Wanna show me how sweet you are?

canon is far cry 4, voictesting our great king

shrieks

come give your stepdaddy a kiss, ajay .3.

he will do no such thing >:[

your MOTHER would have >:T

well he's not his mom so quit being a creepazoid >:I

I've been away from RP for so long, but I couldn't resist

come antagonist brother, lets hold hands

you sure you want to, Pagan? He's probably been places you wouldn't even make Gary go

gary's done things, man. don't underestimate those filthy hands.

Poor man only came to Kyrat for the scenary...

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