upcoming fourth wall events, maybe.

[cancerousrage]

I DO NOT *FLAIL*. I MAKE MY POINTS WITH GRAVITAS AND DIGNITY, YOU RIDICULOUS PINK-SKINNED IDIOT. ALSO, WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING? I THOUGHT YOU'D HAVE FORGOTTEN ALL ABOUT ME BY NOW, BUT NO. YOU CAN'T LEAVE ME ALONE, CAN YOU? EVERY TIME I THINK I'M FINALLY SAFE, BURIED SAFELY DEEP INSIDE THE PILE OF EXCREMENT THAT FILLS YOUR THINKPAN, YOU HAVE TO ROOT THROUGH THE SHIT AND DRAG ME BACK UP KICKING AND SCREAMING, YOU SADISTIC JERK. I'M ALREADY DEAD, IS THAT NOT PUNISHMENT ENOUGH FOR WHATEVER FUCK-UP I COMMITTED WHEN I WAS ALIVE? DO I REALLY HAVE TO SPEND ETERNITY SAT AROUND WAITING FOR YOU TO REMEMBER I EXIST ON THE RARE OCCASION YOU FEEL LIKE IT? BEING ERASED FOREVER IS STARTING TO SEEM VERY ATTRACTIVE, HONESTLY.

...NO, I DO NOT WANT TO SEE THE ASSORTMENT OF MORONS AND WASTES OF SPACE AT THIS OTHER PLACE. TRY THE OTHER GREY SHOUTY IMBECILE. OR NEPETA. THEY MIGHT ACTUALLY WANT TO SEE NEPETA, EVEN IF SHE IS ALREADY THERE.

Comments

[tenthsicle]

Do you always talk this much?

[using the word "talking" loosely here.]

[cancerousrage]

I CAN TALK AS MUCH AS I LIKE, HUMAN. NOBODY IS MAKING YOU LISTEN, IF YOU'RE SO STUPID AS TO THINK YOU DON'T NEED TO.

[tenthsicle]

Just because you can doesn't mean you should. You sound like an idiot.

[Also he's not moving. He likes it in his throne chair very much, and has no intention of getting up. For anything.]

[accept_the_consequences]

Gravitas my ass. You might be grey and have horns, but you're the same Vantas I know. I swear I don't know how I haven't gone deaf being your friend.

[He looks Karkat up and down.]

So what's with the look? I can tell that ain't body paint.

[cancerousrage]

TROLLS DON'T HAVE FRIENDS, YOU PANDEAD PINK FREAK OF NATURE. THIS IS ONE OF THOSE REALLY STUPID WORLDS, ISN'T IT? THE ONES WHERE I AM NOT, IN FACT, AN AWESOME KILLING MACHINE OF GLORY AND VICTORY, BUT HAVE BEEN REDUCED TO A PATHETIC HUMAN.

[accept_the_consequences]

So you're a troll. I'm guessing not the type that lives under a bridge.

I'm also going to call bullshit on trolls not having friends on the grounds that I'm pretty sure Kanaya Maryam exists in your universe.

[He shrugs.]

I wouldn't deny my world being stupid and I sure as fuck hope you didn't turn into some monstrous killing machine when you were put into the program. I never ran into my version of you though so the only thing I know is I died before you did.

[cancerousrage]

YOU'RE THE HUMAN KNOWN AS DAVE, RIGHT?

CLEARLY I DON'T LIVE UNDER A BRIDGE. FOR ONE, I'M CURRENTLY WHAT YOU MIGHT CALL MORTALITY-CHALLENGED, SO I'M NOT LIVING ANYWHERE. AND FOR TWO, WHY THE FUCK WOULD ANYONE WANT TO LIVE THERE? IT SOUNDS LIKE A STUPID PLACE TO LIVE.

HUMAN ME SOUNDS LIKE A WASTE OF SPACE, HONESTLY.

[accept_the_consequences]

Yeah Dave Strider, professional badass, unprofessional soccer player.

I'm the same way, but kind of hard to get over the vernacular. I've only been dead a few hours probably.

He's a shouty asshole, but he's not a waste of space. That honor belongs to Ampora.

Still probably wouldn't wish SBURB on him either though.