(no subject)

[chafe_meister]

Ladies and gentlemen of all races and species, and those in between...except Krogans, let me offer you this amazing one time deal!

CALIBRATIONS OF ALL THE THINGS!

All the things.

All.

Comments

[thats_me_shepard]

I do not require your services, Garrus, but this is very generous of you.

Though why exclude Krogans? What if Grunt were to need a calibration?

[chafe_meister]

You sure? You're passing up a once in a lifetime opportunity here, Thane. I'm pretty good at calibrating.

[Shrug.]

Because they probably wouldn't appreciate it as much. Wrex is welcome to it though.

[thats_me_shepard]

Once in a lifetime... that is certainly quite the offer.

[He will ponder it now, but not say anything else on it.]

Offering this to the leader of Grunt's clan but not him in turn does seem a bit odd. Don't you agree?

[chafe_meister]

I thought so too.

Fine, fine Grunt as well. But that's it, just those two. They can feel special.

[thats_me_shepard]

Then perhaps I could take you up on this offer. I usually have no issues with up keep for my weapons, but lately I have had some difficulties with with rifle. Perhaps the expert calibrations from someone so skilled would benefit me.

I would go into battle with weapons in perfect condition as it were.

[A soft, if not very light chuckle.]

That is very kind of you.

[chafe_meister]

The only way the thing will be better, once I'm through with it, is if it could travel about and shoot itself.

[thats_me_shepard]

I would rather like to see that.

[Though really it was much more fun to shoot it himself. What was the point of being a trained killer if he didn't do his own killing?]

[dreamofdays]

You said all the things, y'know. So would that include watches and stuff? 'Cause mine keeps slipping cogs on the inside. Makes it hard to keep track of time, y'know.

[Please, Space Batman?]

[chafe_meister]

[He humphs and aahs as he ponders over this.]

It falls under all the things.

[Sob.]

[dreamofdays]

Okay. So, y'know... could you please fix it?

[:)?]

[chafe_meister]

...I'll make it better too.

[neuterskrogan]

Generous offer, Garrus. Not currently in need of calibrations.

In fact, would appreciate if lab equipment were left uncalibrated.

[chafe_meister]

None at all?

[WELL HERE, HAVE AN AWKWARD SHUFFLE.]

[neuterskrogan]

No. Have everything under control here, Garrus.

Sure someone has a big gun somewhere that could use calibrating.

[8|]

[chafe_meister]

Uh...okay, if you're sure. I mean, it is a one time deal. [Unless y'know...Shepard and stuff.

:| Don't judge him Mordin]

[spacesamurai]

The code has rules on "calibrations".

Just so you know.

[chafe_meister]

Yeah?

[unwilling_messiah]

[What. She leaves you alone for...however long and this is what happens?]

...Garrus, did you hit your head?

[chafe_meister]

[OH HAY SHEPARD WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG? :| You left him alone...and then he got talking to Thane.

All the calibrations.]

Everyone thinks I've done something. [If he could pout, he would be doing it right now.]

Just making a very generous offer. I even extended it to some people, that's just how nice I am.

[unwilling_messiah]

[SHE WAS BUSY...you know...fighting a war and everything. It's no easy task.

....The politicians and everything. Yea.]

It's just new to me, is all. [She holds her hands up, she didn't mean to offend, bro.]

I mean, you don't usually make such...offers.

[chafe_meister]

Hey, you aren't the only one, this is new to me too.

[Aw, Shepard.]

I can take it all back and just make it for you. [LOOK AT HIS SMILE SHEPARD, AAAW YEAH!]

With less fail in reading this time

[unwilling_messiah]

Well, the next time you decide to do something like this, let me know first.

[Dammit, Garrus. That smile gets her every time.]

Well, now that you put it like that... Now I'm not so worried about you going crazy or some silly thing.

[chafe_meister]

I'll send you a request, mark it urgent so you read it first.

Or you know, just ask.

[Why do you think he does it, huh? It's a secret weapon. Bwa haha.]

That changed things, huh?

[missedtwoyears]

...Well, now I have some idea where Tali got the brandy.

I DIDN'T FORGET YOU SHEPARD!

[chafe_meister]

Shepard...just what are you suggesting, hmm? Hmm?