On the mun's readthrough of the Clone Saga

[unobtainableredemption]

Hey, do us both a favor and leave my past where it is. There's nothing I want to relive there.

I don't care what Aracely thinks, thinking of Reilly doesn't make me want to be a better man, it just reminds me of what a monster I was...

am.

Comments

[arach_nerd]

Why don't you ever call me?

No, seriously, you need to call me. I think you're the only person that might possibly be able grasp that Otto's using my body as a meatsuit right now. Everyone else is tossing around the idiot ball.

[unobtainableredemption]

I've been--wait. Otto as in Doctor Octopus? So that's why "you" tried to kill me back in New York. And why you accused me of killing you. [Sorry, Pete, he's been preoccupied with his own problems down in Houston... that and his latest chat with "you" ended in a fight with the Jackal and a crapton of clones, so join him to the list of people tossing around the idiot ball. Really, blame Slott and Yost--he would have noticed otherwise.]

How the hell did you let that happen!?

[arach_nerd]

It was the Octobot's hivemind. Accessing it let Otto get into my brain, and he used that to swap our minds.

I tried getting it back, but it didn't work, so before Otto's body died with me in it I forced him to relive pretty much everything I've ever been through as a last ditch effort. Figured if I couldn't live I could at least make him try to turn over a new leaf.

It sort of worked, in that he's apparently attempting to be a hero, but he's still the same selfish twisted manipulative jerk who's only out for himself he ever was, just on the right side of the law

[unobtainableredemption]

Heh, and here I thought you were finally realizing what had to be done with those idiots that continually terrorize you. [Shakes his head. Who'd have thought that his belief at the height of his insanity that Doctor Octopus would one day harm the Parker family actually came true?] How much time did I spend harassing you and Reilly, trying to "protect" you and the one time your life gets fucked up beyond repair, I'm too busy with my own problems to notice.

Figures. I inherited your awful luck, after all.

So what do you want me to do? Kill him again?

[arach_nerd]

Well, seeing as that's my body, no. Tell someone who can actually do something about it. Like Dr. Strange. And let the Avengers know what's going on.

[unobtainableredemption]

[What? You're asking your evil clone to take care of a problem. You should know by now what his definition of "taking care of" is!] Right, let me just go walk into the Avengers mansion or tower or what-the-fuck-ever building they're in right now --[Makes a mental note to put a dollar in the swear jar later.]-- and say "Hi, my name is Kaine, Spider-Man's evil clone. You might remember me as the fake Spider-Man who killed the Spider Queen, or the guy who's still a wanted fugitive. I've just stopped by to borrow a cup of sugar and more importantly to let you know that the guy parading around as Spider-Man right now isn't actually my idiot brother, but Doctor Octopus possessing his body. Yeah, as a matter of fact I have been in Houston since Spider-Island, so don't ask me how I know this."

[He glares.] And then they all try to kill me at once.

[arach_nerd]

They wouldn't try to kill you. Beat the hell out of you, possibly. And at least some of them are suspecting something is up. It's not entirely out of the question that they'd listen after they finished beating the snot out of you. Weirder things have happened

[greatestheroever]

You don't have to be a monster. It would help if you didn't bring people here that make the telepaths scream and fall over.

[unobtainableredemption]

So I've been told. I'll believe it when I no longer feel like one.

[Runs a hand through his hair.] I didn't know Aracely would do that. I brought her to be a decoy and to bring the telepaths up to speed, not send them all into convulsions.

That and I wanted to find out what the hell she is.

[greatestheroever]

I know a lot of good people who've done bad things. So long as you work at it, you can be someone's hero.

[His hero is Deadpool. Just saying.]

Okay, I believe you. It just kind of freaks us out because it's never a good sign. But Aracely seems nice.

[unobtainableredemption]

[Snorts] I've been trying the whole "superhero" thing. [He can barely say the word superhero.] I'm still trying to figure out why.

[Please don't say that out loud. He won't take that as a compliment.]

She's a good kid.

...I'm sorry, by the way. For murdering your headmaster.

Even if I knew it would only be temporary. [Well, he thought it would be, anyway. Either way he figured it would be a win-win for him.]

[greatestheroever]

Because you can help people! And you won't feel bad anymore.

[Evan does not look happy at that reminder.] I wish people would stop trying to kill Mr. Logan. And that he'd stop killing people. But it doesn't seem like that's going to happen.

[unobtainableredemption]

I've been helping people. But the scales just aren't balancing.

Sorry kid, I can tell you from experience that's never gonna happen. People like us, like me and Mr. Logan, pissed off too many people in the past... and the past always catches up to you. Even if you have the best of intentions in the here and now.

But he seems like a nice enough guy now... so focus on that. [Yes, he's aware he's a hypocrite for saying that.]

[skullfudgingmotherfunker]

Can't say you look very monstery to me, mate. I mean hey, I know that sometimes the real monster is the one inside us and man is the biggest monster and all that jazz, but like... if you say you're a monster with that kind of tone, odds are that you really aren't.

[Yes, suddenly a burning, hovering skull with a pleasant British accent. Because why not?]

[unobtainableredemption]

[Okay, weird, but definitely not the weirdest thing he's seen since Tuesday. Also, he may not look like a monster on the outside, just don't look in his head.]

Is everyone trying to be my friggin' psychiatrist now? You don't know me.

[skullfudgingmotherfunker]

That I don't! But let me put it to you like this: have you ever coralled a bunch of people together and set their faces on fire simply because you like the sound of boiling eyeballs?

[unobtainableredemption]

[Kaine's hand starts to glow.] No, but I've enjoyed burning my mark onto the faces of my prey before I killed them. [He says it with an absolute straight face, but inside he can feel the pangs of guilt punching him in the gut. Why the hell does he feel like he has something to prove to this asshole?]

[skullfudgingmotherfunker]

Oooh, that IS approaching some pretty hardcore levels, that I do admit. So what was your game, eh? Children? Prostitutes? The elderly and slash or infirm? Presbyterians? Please say presbyterians, they've always rubbed me the wrong way.

[And the skull, well. The skull keeps on talking as if they're discussing the weather and how it's a bit balmy, innit, instead of a traumatic series of events that has forever scarred this mans soul.

Bit of an asshole, yes.]

[unobtainableredemption]

[Dear god, he thought his brothers talked too much.] Whoever I was paid to.

Who the fuck are you exactly?

sorry this is so late but i just couldn't resist!

[bedeviledspider]

Don't tell me you've tricked another kid into thinking you're some kind of hero, Kaine.

[ Gosh, mysterious devil dude, why you gotta be so snarky? ]

oh god this is going to be awful in the best way

[unobtainableredemption]

[Who are you, fake Daredevil and why are you acting like you know him?]

Never claimed to be a hero. To anyone, kid or otherwise.

Do I know you?

Re: oh god this is going to be awful in the best way

[bedeviledspider]

Sounds to me like this Aracely thinks otherwise.

Anyway — my guess? This is some alternate universe thing. Your face is a lot less horrifying than I remember.

[unobtainableredemption]

[That actually gets a short laugh out of him.] Aracely knows exactly who I am. I don't hide it from her--not that it's any of your business at all.

[Dryly] It's amazing what a good dermatologist and a haircut can do. [Takes a step towards Reilly.] Not good enough. You know me and I want to know how. [Mainly because everyone in his past has been trying to kill him and he'd really like to be prepared for once the next time someone goes after those he cares about.]

[bedeviledspider]

[ To his credit, Reilly doesn't budge an inch, even though there is a menacing dude all up in his space now. ] Hey! I don't owe you an explanation. After all, it's your fault I look like... this.

Most of the time.

[ Not that it bothers him. Much. Besides, maybe that little tidbit will keep Kaine from asking the really tough questions. ]

[unobtainableredemption]

[That gives Kaine pause. He'd certainly given people makeovers, but that was certainly not his mark.]

Good try, but I'm not buying it. I've done many things, but turning someone into some sort of zombie Daredevil wannabe isn't one of them.[He's so unprepared for alternate realities... That's Peter's thing, Ben's thing. Hell he can barely comprehend the microverse and he was there.]