dear_mun | Entries tagged with canon: dc comics (wildstorm)

Look, I'd say I'm grateful for you remembering that I exist, but I'd be lying. The last time you showed an interest in me you shoved me into a torture-happy space station and I wasn't the one doing the torturing. I'll give you that the less interesting Back to the Future pseudo-futuristic America is a step up from that, but just barely. I have no intentions of being stranded someplace where I get dragged into yet another corrupt administrations's delusions of grandeur. Been there, done that, threw the guy that tried to sell me the t-shirt out the window.

Yeah, yeah, I'm aware I don't have a choice. Let me pretend that I do.

P.S. Have you seriously learned nothing from this damn reboot nonsense? How the hell can you possibly be looking forward to that Edward Cullen rip-off that inexplicably shares my name getting his own series? I can't wait to laugh in your face when it all inevitably goes to hell.

lifer

Not to come off as a puppy-hating jackass if I ain't peeing myself with excitement --

But at this juncture, schmoozing with the whole menagerie after it gets purple-eyed and carnivorous at you on a weekly basis is kinda like, say...

... Eating a deep-fried stick of butter. On a stick.

Too much of a "good thing."

waiting

Hey. Hold up a sec, would you?

Dying three times in nine months is kind of overkill. Don't you think I deserve to catch a break after everything else you put me through?

And stop trying to make that other thing happen while you're at it, because seriously. Seriously? I don't need my life to be any more complicated than it already is.

maidofiron

I'm not all that sure that showing Tony the Carrier was that great of an idea. I mean; you heard him talking! If we ever see a Reed Richards in our World I'm not sure he can resist the temptation to brag. Still...the look on his face. Good call Mun. That was pretty awesome.

sarah_rainmaker

Okay so maybe I'm being selfish. But it's your fault for introducing us! Okay yes I haven't seen her in a while but...[there's a bit of a sigh]

It's just not fair.

And by the way don't think I didn't notice! HAM! You had HAM for chirstmas dinner! Do you know what they do to those pigs in those places!!? And DON'T GET ME STARTED ON YOUR USE OF PAPER PLATES! Your recycling plastic does not make you exempt from other forms of waste! And I don't want to hear about the "expensiveness of the meat free lifestyle". IT'S NOT MORE EXPENSIVE THAN YOUR SOUL.

No I am not making too big a deal about this. You knew what you were getting into when you picked me up. Now you're stuck with me and if I cannot picket then I will make sure at least you are doing better for your planet than you have in the past. Why do you think you get sick so much? It's all the garbage you put into your body.

Damn straight you're going to start shopping at the farmers market again. That headache you have is me electrcuting the nerve endings in your temples.

maidofiron

Mun! Why would you do this!?

That's terribly mean of you (even if I am interested to see the rest of them).

cutestcentury

Wait, let me try to understand this again.

You reread the issues with Sparks death and suddenly my voice is back.

...yeah no, sorry, you're nuts.

And this is me saying that.

waiting

Hey.

Can't say this is the worst life decision you've ever made, but it's definitely not the best one you could have. I just don't think it's a good idea, all right?

Try to remember that I have more than two facial expressions, though. Yeah, yeah, I know you can't find any other icons of me you like, but maybe if you actually bothered to make more of your own you wouldn't be having this problem. Guess this is the closest to a picture of me smiling you'll get.

viced

No, I don't want to fucking hear the bullshit about platforms, and you don't have to think about it as my party's platform, either. It's not funny, or cute, and I don't care if it makes it bearable. Our second run probably went a hell of a lot smoother than that, and if I can remind you of the fact, it'd be a breath of fresh air. Politics isn't a goddamned joke, remember?

Now get your ass in gear and stop getting distracted. We've got a lot to do, and procrastinating on doing your part of my job. Don't drop the damn ball, not right now.

viced

I know what it looks like, and don't think I've been ignoring just how fucking much you've been enjoying shit recently. Look, just because things have had to progress in a certain way doesn't mean that I'm going to keep going that way. So what if I used the talents of some people? It's not like there's a fucking downside!

Besides that, you know how I feel about this shit. How else am I supposed to deal with some of the media heat if we don't take steps to keep it off? We can't, so why don't we just agree that this has to be done right now, and then move on. Let's especially get to the moving on part. We can do that, right? Skip over everything else? I think I'll be a lot more happy if I'm not busy pandering for the shitty gossip rags.

maidofiron

So! New site huh? Pretty good I gotta say. And I'm kind of excited about the possibilities it brings with it. Of course I know you miss all the icons but whatever alright. You'll save up money and get new ones! I know you know how to save money. You don't have to be a math genius for that.

And while I'm giving you life advice: stick to the healthy eating! I know I don't have to but hey, I have nanomachines keeping every cell of my body in pique physical health. YOU on the other hand have no idea when you're going to make it to a doctor again. So you need to take care of yourself.

cutestcentury

Okay, so first things first.

One, that username has to go. No, I'm not kidding.

Two, you've got a lot to reread. And not the time for it at all- which brings us to point three.

...What the fuck do you think you're doing?

grouchinleather

It's gone from a cute joke to insulting to overpriced kindling. Stop it. That isn't me, and that sure as hell isn't Apollo or Jenny Q or the Engineer or even Hawksmoor. Even when we were stuck on all those alternate earths, it was still some sort of broken funhouse mirror version of us. I refuse to acknowledge that "bwahaha" world exists. This isn't even close.

Now flip to that last page so I can see whose skulls I need to crack.

parroted

We both know there's many worlds beyond the one I come from. This one is different. It doesn't have a me. But it does have Hundred. So you intend to send me to face my murderer again?

At least I won't be without friends. Manhattan, even Faux-Manhattan is a jungle, full of cats, rats, and cockroaches, birds, bees and canines. I can protect them and they can PROTECT ME.

Dear Mun . . .

I think we have issues.

Entries tagged with canon: dc comics (wildstorm)

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