dear_mun | voice testing!

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voice testing!

Heeeey, mun. I'm always up for a new adventure and all, but I get this feeling that we need to have a talk before this one.

First off: I want to actually do stuff. A lot of your muses just sit around all day. I already tried that, remember? It was a fiasco. Second: how am I supposed to have awesome adventures if Cake isn't here? Third: I also need some more icons.

Okay, I guess that's all. For now. As long as you're sure the Ice Queen isn't stirring up any trouble right now....

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You kidding? If mine are anything to go by, it's pretty much guaranteed she's up to something.

Bad guys are predictable that way.

That's sort of what I was thinking, but apparently there's this thing where time's standing still back home while we're here! And that's just as well, because otherwise I'd probably miss out on the sandwich I just made.

Couldn't you just make another one here?

[You are one weird girl, whoever you are. Oddly enough the bunny hat's something he sees as semi-normal.

...his is a charmed life.]

Yeah, probably, but I just made that one.

Yeah, but you could make like, ten here to make up for it. Or more.

Was it really that special a sandwich?

You're missing the point here. That's my sandwich.

But it's just a sandwich. And you could make another one!

Haven't you ever had someone swipe a sandwich you made?

No.

[They were made by Aunt May. So, technically, that's not really a lie.]

One of the benefits of being a superhero is that people don't go around stealing your lunch. Kind of an embarrassing story to give once they get sent to prison.

Huh.

[She sounds genuinely interested here.]

Maybe that's the next step. How do you become a super hero? But, uh... prison?

Superpowers and an unnatural desire to run around in a brightly colored costume.

[He's actually being kind of serious, with that.]

Prison's...well, prison. A jail. How do you not have those?

Oh, jail. You could have just said that. Or dungeon, I guess.

And that sounds fun! I'm not sure how I'd get superpowers though. You got any ideas?

I did say that! I said prisons! And who has dungeons anymore?

And yeah, the superhero gig's fun and all, right up until crazy nutjobs keep trying to kill you all the time. I got mine from a genetically engineered spider bite, but I hear that origin story's not for everyone.

And that there's a shortage of genetically engineered spiders running around.

Hmmm... Well, Ice Queen has... actually that's more a cage. But Prince Gumball has one. I guess you're right, they're not all that common.

Eh, if crazy nutjobs try to kill you all you have to do is sock 'em in the jaw, and usually that takes care of it. Genetically engineered spider, huh? Hmmm..... Yeah, I don't think I've ever met one.

Obviously you've never had to deal with someone like Rhino or Sandman. Socking-in-the-jaw isn't really an approach that works out.

Plus I'd probably just hurt my hand. On Rhino, anyway. With Sandman, it's just like punching a sand castle. A sand castle that occasionally tries to violently kill you. Back when he was still evil, anyway.

[And, y'know. Alive. Though Spidey doesn't know that part's still true yet.]

Hmm, sounds like a tough case. Usually when Ice Queen or whoever gets out of hand or there's a monster or something I just beat them up.

Well. Cake helps.

Okay, helps a lot.

Well, so do I, but it's not exactly easy.

[Wait, did she say cake? Like, food cake?]

...how exactly does cake help? Do you fight better after dessert, or what?

Now there's an idea. But nah. Cake's my best friend. She's a cat with magic stretchy powers.

...o-kay...well, I guess she counts as a superhero? Not sure if there's a rule that no cats are allowed. Dogs, either. Or any kind of animal, actually.

There really should be a rule book for this sort of thing.

What? Aw man, she doesn't remember how she got her powers, so I don't know how I could get them.

Just do me a favor and don't go around trying to get things to bite you. Pretty sure my case was a fluke.

In the meantime, it sounds like you do enough butt kicking on your own, so that's gotta count for something, right?

[She shrugs]

Somebody's gotta do it.

Hey there!

It's good to see you again. Your name is...Fionna, right?

[Fionna gives a little almost angry sort of gasp and slides into a fighting position.]

Ice Queen!

[Then she sort of pauses, confused, straightens up a bit, and looks her over more carefully.]

Uh, you are Ice Queen, aren't you?

No, at least not exactly.

I'm, well I'm me before the whole Ice Queen thing. I'm nothing like her, but I can't deny I'm the one who has caused you trouble.

[... well that's confusing.]

Huh?

My name is Simone Petrikov

[She gestured to the tiara at her hip.]

I received this tiara some time ago. It may look familiar to you. As far as I can gather from talking to other people this tiara will eventually make me go crazy and start calling myself the Ice Queen.

Oh. Well why don't you just do this?

[Fionna lunges forward to kick the tiara away!

Fionna. Fionna no, violence is not the solution to every problemla;gkdfhuigtfh]

[That causes her to jump back and fall on her rear. She looks up at Fionna rather disgruntled.]

Because I have to use it to protect Marshall Lee! It doesn't matter what happens to me as long as I can keep him safe.

Oh. Well, there's better ways to protect someone!

Not in our situation. I explored my fair share of ruins, but I can't fight radioactive zombies with no weapons and no help.

And unless you can time travel I won't be getting any help.

Hmm, well, have you ever tried it? And huh, time travel. Maybe PG would have an idea how to do that.

Of course. I had some idea I was going crazy from the crown, but nothing I did worked except using the crown to mow them down.

If I had any other option I would take it.

Mmmm I guess that makes things tricker.

Well short of the time machine thing there is something you can do for me whenever you get home.

Oh yeah? Well, what is it?

Help out Marshall Lee. I know he's older and stronger than the time I'm in, but I still worry.

Not to mention I imagine this whole Ice Queen thing didn't go over well with him.

Oh, him? Psh, you really don't need to worry about him. He's fine. Annoying, sometimes, but fine.

I know I've seen him. He grew up stronger than even I could of hoped, but I think he needs someone he knows he can rely on.

[She gives a half-hearted laugh.]

Besides since I'm not around somebody has to show him around some awesome ruins.

Okay I guess. I mean, we already hang out. Sometimes. I mean, not like that, so don't get any ideas, but I'm okay with giving him a hand or whatever.

Besides with an adventurer like you around you might find a way to get me back to normal. I have to be in there somewhere.

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voice testing!

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