re: being dusted off after forever

[stretchy_pants]

I thought I'd gotten away from you, to be honest. Life is completely fine in my little corner of your headspace because it's uneventful here. The only people who bother me are those wolf kids who keep coming around to ask for my autograph, and they're mostly harmless. If you're back and thinking about sticking me somewhere again, that really can't be a good thing. Your intentions are always the opposite of harmless. If I could just give you my autograph and make you go away, that would be fantastic; but I know you and I doubt it's going to be that easy.

Comments

[bowsbeforehoes]

So can I have your autograph?

[stretchy_pants]

Do you have a Sharpie?

[bowsbeforehoes]

Shouldn't you have one? I mean, you're the one handing out your autographs to teenagers.

[stretchy_pants]

It's the easiest way to get them to stop staring. Normally they bring their own writing utensils.

[bowsbeforehoes]

I'll make sure to bring one the next time I see you.

[stretchy_pants]

Okay. I'll get yours while we're at it. Make it an even trade.

[rebuffs]

Wolf kids. [ well, why not, she's talking to the guy who turns into the hulk. ] No offense, but you're.. shorter up close than I expected you to be.

[stretchy_pants]

Werewolves. [He takes absolutely zero offense to that. Quite the contrary, he looks kind of amused.] I get that a lot, actually. What were you expecting?

[rebuffs]

You know, uh. [ a pause. ] Actually, I'm not sure. I was always paying more attention to the Hulk when I was a kid. Way cooler than science talk when you're ten.

[stretchy_pants]

I hear that a lot, too. Somehow, broken city streets just aren't as cool when they're your fault.

[rebuffs]

Yeah, I get that. I mean, sort of. Impending apocalypse and Revolutionary War guy instead of giant green dude hell-bent on breaking stuff, but-- [ she trails off, then waves a hand dismissively. ] You know what? Nevermind, it's not even remotely the same.

[stretchy_pants]

Well, it doesn't sound pleasant, at least? The apocalypse part, mostly. How does a "Revolutionary War guy" fit into the apocalypse?

[rebuffs]

Don't ask me. Something about his wife being a witch and he's connected to a headless guy who might be Death with a capital 'D'. [ a sigh. ] It's seriously a long story. I think I'd prefer aliens.

[stretchy_pants]

The Headless... Horseman? He was certainly a Revolutionary War guy. [But he can see the connection to Death, too.] Huh. That's an interesting spin on it.

[debts]

[ In response, Natasha only throws a tiny plastic figure of the Hulk at him.

Tonelessly (though not unkind): ]

I'm your biggest fan.

[stretchy_pants]

Oh yeah? I bet you've read all of my publications, too.

[He's not quick enough to catch it, so it just kind of bounces off of his chest. When he picks it up, he raises an eyebrow.]

You took it out of the package.

[debts]

[ Simply, as if that's all the reason Natasha needs to do just about anything: ]

I liked it— and it looks good sitting on my dashboard.

[stretchy_pants]

Aren't dashboard figures supposed to have bobble heads or grass skirts?

[Gives the Hulk's head a good flick because he can.]

[debts]

I'll ask Tony to custom-make me one.

[ Why not replace those shorts with a grass skirt? ]

[stretchy_pants]

[Mental facepalm.] I'm sure he'd be more than willing. Especially if it had a tiny ukelele and a lei.

[Also a purple grass skirt, yes.]

[labcoatgirl]

[fondly amused smile]

I wouldn't mind an autograph.

[She's teasing him.]

[stretchy_pants]

[Oh. Staring. There's staring going on.

Give him a second. He's actually never come across Betty here.]

I-- Are you sure you don't have one laying around somewhere?

[labcoatgirl]

Well...sadly most of them were confiscated... [Betty is almost apologetic...if she wasn't quietly happy about seeing him. Holding her clipboard close as she takes a step closer as if hoping he's not going to disappear somehow.]

Perhaps you could sign my notes on fluid dynamics? [Her smile playing around her lips.]

[starkingenuity]

Admit it, Banner. You just really missed me.

[eignaz]

I do hope you're charging them double the price for your autograph, given who is doing the signing.

Mr. Endless Rage beneath the calm exterior, meet. Mr. Angry unhinged, and totally psycho

[captain_t]

Yeah, these mun people wanna make us do things we really don't wanna do, don't they?

Jesus, I wish they'd leave us the hell alone. Then again, you say you've got... wolf kids?

[He doesn't even know what to make of that.]