On weird, twisted AU ideas.

[willoffire]

Oh, hell no.

Comments

these icons are so inappropriate for this. ALSO I AM APOLOGIZING RIGHT NOW

[1stguardian]

C’mon, Naruto.

[ Coaxingly spoken as it is, there’s an undercurrent of amusement in Ichigo’s voice as he moves toward Naruto, his unhurried gait that of a predator stalking particularly difficult prey. It’s slow and measured, so controlled that he wastes not an ounce of energy more than necessary.

There’s deliberation in the way the smirk slides across his lips. And there’s something wild and wicked in his eyes. ]

It’ll be fun.

WHAT EVEN. NEVER APOLOGIZE!

[willoffire]

[ alksfhgsjfkg mental keyboard smashing, it begins! Naruto's recoiling already. See that, Ichigo? One step back, finger pointed at the approaching young man. He's heard about this and it's all wrong. Motions which should have a warrior's grace have shifted and Naruto recognizes that. This is Ichigo, but it's not, and it's the 'not' which forces that tiny retreat. ]

Hold it! Hold it right there! You got me mixed up with someone else!

Yeah, yeah, you totally do! See, I'm not him! So-- uh. [ Oh hell, he's run out of bullshit. Think fast. ] Uh.

It won't be fun, 'coz I'm not him! So you stay right where you are, damnit!

APOLOGIES FOREVER

[1stguardian]

[ The smirk only grows sharper. The amusement more obvious. It's so much more fun when they run. ]

Of course you are.

[ But he'll play the game. At least for the moment. ]

I'd know you anywhere. See? I remember you this time.

SHDKJHAKJHD NO! SHUSH!

[willoffire]

That's-- [ True. Technically. He does remember him this time, that much is obvious. But it's also obviously for all the wrong reasons.

Naruto takes one more step back, before he pauses. Takes a breath. ]

Listen. Ichigo. I dunno what weird ideas you got in your head, but you gotta get rid of them right now. Alright?

FUUUUUUUUUU

[1stguardian]

[ Naruto pauses, but Ichigo doesn't. One step. Two. Stalking forward undeterred. ]

You don't know?

[ Closer. Closer. Just a few steps more... ]

Want me to tell you?

[willoffire]

NO! [ Kneejerk reaction. Spluttered out as he catches himself on the cusp of taking another step back. He forces himself to stop. No more retreats. It's not acting as a deterrent in the least.

So he needs to find one. Really damn fast because Ichigo is still getting closer. ]

No tellin' me ideas. No tellin' me anything. You gotta turn around and go back-- Back. Nn. Home! You shouldn't be here.

[1stguardian]

Okay. Fine. I won't tell you anything.

[ His agreement comes easily. Carelessly lazy. But he doesn't stop, not until he's close enough to lean into Naruto's space. ]

I'll show you instead.

[malignancy]

Only three words? I think that's a record.

[willoffire]

Hey! What the hell, Sasuke? I don't talk that much! Besides, there's nothing else to say when stupid ideas are so stupid.

[malignancy]

Stupid ideas should be right up your alley.

[willoffire]

Kinda like being a jerk is right up yours. [ Wait. What. ] NO, THEY SHOULDN'T! I got great ideas! All the time.

[malignancy]

Enlighten me.

[willoffire]

What.


Right now?

1/2

[malignancy]

Oh, I suppose I could wait for a bit. It's not like I have a village to slaughter or anything.

[malignancy]

When do you think, idiot?

[neverbetold]

Getting into trouble again, Naruto?

[willoffire]

NO! It wasn't me! It-- Hey, don't go blamin' me this time! I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING!

[neverbetold]

Did I place blame?

[willoffire]

No!

Not. Yet?

[neverbetold]

Do I strike you as the sort who would?

[willoffire]

Uh, no. Just. It's the 'again' part, like I always get into trouble. I don't always get into trouble! Hell, some of the trouble I've gotten into, you caused!

[cadaveregis]

Quiet, aren't you?

[willoffire]

Not a lot t'say sometimes. Besides, actions talk louder than words. Right?

...s'weird. Seeing you.

[cadaveregis]

Standard reaction, used to it by now.

[konohalegend]

No to what?