strawberry milkshake tastes better than voice tests

[gin_san]

Oi.

Ooooiiii.

Are you listening, Mun-chan? Are you really, really listening?

You are, huh? That's good, 'cuz I've got something real important that I gotta ask you.



WHY'D YOU THINK IT WAS A GOOD IDEA TO MAKE ME AN ACCOUNT WHEN YOU ONLY BOTHERED TO GIVE ME FIVE ICONS, HUH? You went and made 30 just the other day for H*take K*k*shi and that guy already has over 150! He's not even the main character of N*ruto! I'm in every episode of Gintama and I only get five? Five? That's not even enough to take up all the space in the most basic account setting!

Are you saying Gin-san isn't as handsome as the C*py N*nja? Do I need to wear a mask to make myself more charming?

Maybe I should quit Gintama and join the cast of N*ruto, huh. I bet they make tons of money and have their own personal assistants and dressing rooms and everything, those bastards. They're probably taking up all the budget from TV Tokyo which is why Sunrise never has any money to give us and Gin-san has to do dumb things like talk for five minutes straight without a script to take up time so the production team doesn't have to animate that part--

Wait a minute.

WAIT. A. MINUTE.

You didn't even MAKE these icons! You just went and found them at some icon site! All the other JUMP characters in your head have icons that you made just for them, but Gin-san doesn't get even one?? Is my existence so insignificant that I don't even deserve to have you spend a lot of time making icons to represent me? Am I so meaningless that I have to use some pre-made icons, and only just five??

Oh, this is bad, ne. This is really, really bad. Gin-san is having an existential crisis, now.

I can fire you, right? I won't be stuck with you forever, right? Right?

Comments

[thegodofdestruction]

[A bizarre purple rabbit/cat man appears next to Gin.]

Hey silver-haired guy, are you a strong warrior?

1/?

[gin_san]

Strong warrior, shmwarrior, it's all the same--

[gin_san]

[ ... wait a minute. ]

[gin_san]

[ WAIT

A

MINUTE ]

[gin_san]

[gin_san]

DONE

[gin_san]

You're B*lls, right? You're definitely B*lls, right? I'm not imagining things, right? No, wait, that can't possibly be the case, that's impossible, B*lls should still be sleeping, it hasn't been long enough yet, definitely not. Definitely not!

[...LAUGHING NERVOUSLY. ]

[chinagirl]

Maybe now you'll step up and be a better main character aru, right? I have 162 icons, and my mun made most of them. Maybe it's time to change the title to Kagutama.

1/?

[gin_san]

[gin_san]

[ ... ]

[gin_san]

[ 162.

162!?!?

Kagura gets 162 Mun-made icons, all lovingly cropped and resized just for her, and Gin-san doesn't even get one? Not a single measly one?!?! Oi, come on now, that ain't fair, not one bit! Who's the main character of this show, hah? It's definitely not Kagura right? The show's not Kagutama, right?! WHY DOES GIN-SAN ONLY HAVE FIVE ICONS, HUH? There's something very wrong about this, entirely wrong!

Oiiiiiiiiiiii! ]

[gin_san]

[ To his credit, Gin's expression doesn't change at all, and he shoves a finger up his nose, digging out a booger and flicking it in Kagura's general direction. ]

DONE

[gin_san]

[ But of course, booger-flicking is not enough of a comeback. Gin-san needs to now demonstrate that he is still, indeed, the main character and star of Gintama. He can't let Kagura's 162 icons overtake his spot in the opening credits! Besides, what kind of title is "Kagutama" anyway? "Gintama" sounds so much cooler! ]

You're just saying that because you're just a kid and you don't understand the challenge of five icons that adults have to go through. [ A sage nod. ] My mun is challenging me because I'm the main character of the show, and main characters always have to have a great challenge to overcome. [ Another sage nod. ] See, I'm doing just fine with five icons, just fine! I don't need 162 icons!

Who needs 162 icons anyway? That's way overdoing it! It's like when KimuTaku* overacts, no one likes that, not one bit.

*KimuTaku is Kimura Takuya, a rather popular actor in TV dramas and movies, and one of those boy band idols. Kind of like Justin Timberlake, but with bigger hair.

[keepcalmandbomb]

Five sound rather sufficient, Gintoki. No matter what expression you make, you still look like a dead fish. Perhaps Mundane-dono is merely being economical.

[gin_san]

[ Yeah of course you can say that, Zura, you have something like 50 fucking icons, you bastard. And it looks like your mun went and painstakingly colored them all from the manga too. Aaaaaaah! This is so fucking annoying! Why do all the minor characters get more icons?!!?

Gin stares at Zura, trying not to let a vein twitch at his temple, because that would totally ruin the entire Main Character Is Too Cool For School act that he's trying to put on here. Which involves sticking a finger in his ear and digging at the ear wax. ]

Or maybe she's just trying to give me a real challenge. Not that you'd know what a real challenge is. You have ten times the amount of icons I have, Zura.

[ Oh, look, that's a nice big chunk right there on his pinky when he pulls it out. He holds it up in front of him and blows.

It lands rather perfectly dead smack center between Zura's eyes. ]

[spicycracker]

Gin-san, I'm sure everything will be alright even with the lack of icons.

1/2

[gin_san]

[ Wait a minute. Hold on a second. Wait wait wait! You're dead, aren't you? You're definitely dead! Since when did dead characters come back to life on Gintama? That's just ripping off N*ruto! Is this some kind of edo tensei? Is Or*ch*m*ru behind this? Or maybe... *****? Have we crossed over into another shounen show?

Oh right. This is one of those things that happen in roleplays. Calm down, Gin-san, it's perfectly normal. ]

[gin_san]

Hahaha! I'm sure you're right! Hahaha!

[ Nope, not nervous laughter, definitely not. CONFIDENT LAUGHTER, IT'S CONFIDENT. ]

[sucksatkidou]

[Renji just. Stares for a second. Then blinks.]

Oh, boo-fuckin'-hoo. Welcome to the muse life.

1/2

[gin_san]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know, I know, the muns are in charge and the muses are their bitches and we gotta just take it up the ass all the time, especially when the muns are into that yaoi shit, blah blah blah.

[ Waves a hand dismissively. ]

That doesn't mean I can't still feel like I've been really shortchanged with the whole ico--

[ And it's then that Gintoki actually gets a good look at the guy. ]

[gin_san]

Oi, wait a minute. No one told me that we were doing a crossover with BLEACH.

[nattoujutsu]

[ HERE'S SOMETHING TO TAKE YOUR MIND OFF ICON PROBLEMS. There is a totally innocent knock at the door. It's not ominous in any way. ]

1/2

[gin_san]

[ So here's Gin-san, who had just been relaxing on the couch watching an episode of Att*ck on T*tan, eating potato chips and scratching his balls, when the knock came. He called for Kagura to answer the door but when there was no response (she's probably taking a shit or something), he finally got up and padded over. ]

Haaai, I'm coming, I'm coming!

[ And then he opens the door. ]

[gin_san]

[ Oh.

It's just the stalker.

He promptly closes the door in her face. ]

[fireworkshow]

Maybe you just didn't do anything to deserve more attention, Gintoki?

((ooc))

[gin_san]

((omg it's a takasugi! hiii! sorry i didn't notice you before, i think you tagged me after i went on hiatus or something and i just saw this... are you still playing takasugi? :O))